Hey, you know what would be cool?
1. The Cure doing a cover of Heart’s “Barracuda”
2. Battered, deep-fried M&Ms
3. A computerized guitar with LEDs in the neck so you could download tabs and chords into it of your favorite songs and learn how to play them that way
4. Alberto Gonzales receiving an enthusiastically hemorrhaging rectal polyp for every single lie he’s told during his testimony on the Hill
5. Everyone who is getting ready to type “Oh, yeah, how about [insert Democrat and/or Clinton administration figure] getting a [insert terrible physical punishment] for [insert alleged incident]?” into the comment thread for this entry suddenly being consumed by an unexpected pack of carnivorous goats, which just happens to be passing by their homes
6. Joan Jett fronting Van Halen
7. Some pie right about now
8. A hybrid engine lawn tractor (he said, after paying $40 for gas for his lawn tractor yesterday)
9. A remote controlled monkey
10. Oh, I don’t know what else. You tell me in the comment thread.