Oh, Look, a Novella

As most of you know, I recently wrote a novella for Metatropolis, the audiobook anthology I edited, which also features kickass stories from Jay Lake, Elizabeth Bear, Tobias Buckell and Karl Schroeder, and which is coming out next month through Audible.com. Since Krissy prefers to read longer stuff like this in printed form, I headed over to Lulu.com and ran off five bound galleys of my story, entitled “Utere Nihil Non Extra Quiritationem Suis.” The galleys arrived today, as you can see here. One copy naturally goes to Krissy, and one copy I’ll keep for my own personal stash. Two of them will go to fulfill this contest I ran earlier in the year; I ended up not writing the novella that I originally attached to that contest, but this one will work just as well. And the last one I’ll keep for a future contest of some sort or another. Since I’m not planning to run off any more bound galleys of this particular story, it’ll be another one of those “highly collectable” things.

Speaking of contests, a quick note: I now have all the stuff I need to fulfill all the contests I ran over the last few months (the folks who were doing the contest for the Zoe’s Tale ARC, remember you’ve been upgraded to the signed first edition), so everyone who is wondering where your winnings are, I’ll make sure those are all in the mail by the end of the month (I’d say sooner, but I’m traveling over the next week). Sorry for the delays. What can I say, I’m a flake. Now you know why I want an assistant.

20 thoughts on “Oh, Look, a Novella

  1. Speaking of assistants, Lynda La Plante has recently been in trouble because it appears that long passages from a novel she wrote in 1993 appear to have been lifted from another book written in 1947 by a holocaust survivor. She claims a research assistant must have lifted the passages and put them in La Plante’s book without her knowing. Seems the assistant wasn’t just researching but collaborating on the book. John, would you use research assistants and would you let the “write” sections of your books? Sorry it is OT but I just happened on the story.

    That is one fine pig. Certainly doesn’t need tarting up with lipstick.

  2. Shane:

    a) No, and

    b) Anyone who claims to write a book without knowing exactly what got into it deserves what she gets. If she owns the copyright, it’s her problem to handle.

  3. Thanks for the reply John, I always wondered why some novelists had research assistants. How hard is it to at least google? Anyway, background research is kind of fun and I am just anal enough to not trust anyone else to come up with the right information for something I was writing. Now assistants to lick envelopes is an entirely different matter.

  4. I dig the cover.

    Then again, I dig pigs in general. Which is why I don’t eat them.

    You read that right… I no longer (gasp!) eat bacon.

    Do I miss it?

    You bet your ass I do.

    But I’ve managed to convince myself (via self-hypnosis and some fairly painful aversion-therapy techniques) that turkey bacon is almost as good.

  5. Nice pig. So, the obvious question: any hints on what the title translates to in English? The closest I can come up with[1] is something on the order of “Outside of a pig, no one can hear you scream”. Is this even on the right track?

    [1] I never studied Latin, and this is based on the near-gibberish I get from the only online Latin translator that I can get to work.

  6. It just dawned on me to check responses over at Whateveresque, and Kazrak handed out this translation:

    Re: Utere nihil non extra quiritationem suis
    by kazrak on Thu Sep 18, 2008 11:35 am

    “Use every part of the pig except the squeal.”

    Sounds pretty spot on.

  7. @6: the online Latin–>English translator gave me: Either of the two Nothing Not Outside A scream Suis

    I dunno – doesn’t make much sense that way, either.

  8. Kerry, (et. al.)
    Online Latin translators suck. A lot. This one is mistranslating “Utere” which is actually a 2nd person singular imperative of the verb “uti”, “to use”, and leaving “suis” untranslated, which is either “of a pig” or a plural ablative or dative form of “their”.

  9. Quoth tceisele @#6,“Outside of a pig, no one can hear you scream.”

    And inside of a pig, it’s too dark to read a novella.

    But I guess since it was originally an audiobook, it’s OK.

  10. Ok, “Use every part of the pig except the squeal” does make a lot more sense.

    As far as that goes, my original mistranslation would probably make more sense as

    “Inside of a pig, no one can hear you scream”

    I mean, obviously, people can hear you screaming *outside* of a pig, it’s where you generally are when you scream, after all.

    Unless you (and the pig) are in space, of course. Then, I guess nobody will hear you scream in any case.

    On the other hand, if you are, in fact, inside a pig, then you have good *reason* to scream.

  11. As a one-time student of Latin, I get, literally, “Use (imp.) nothing not beyond the cry of a pig” which seems to me to imply a somewhat ironic twist on the common English expression “Use every part of the pig except the squeal.” That being said, I haven’t actually started the novella yet, and therefore can’t begin to guess at authorial intent.

  12. Steven’s post is spot-on. I’d expect something like “Utere omnibus extra quiritationem suis” in lieu of the actual title, but my perplexity has me intrigued.

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