Nov 05 2008

Previously: RIP, Michael Crichton
Ahead: Dear GOP: Please Do Make Sure That Your Next Vice-Presidential Candidate Can Pass a Fifth-Grade Geography Test

Well, Yeah

Published by John Scalzi at 5:53 pm

Just sent to me, the result of the most important election last night:

Man, it wasn’t even close. But how could it be? You can’t defeat bacon. You can’t even hope to try.

(Thanks, Mitchell, for sending that along)

30 responses so far

30 Responses to “Well, Yeah”

  1. lysambreon 05 Nov 2008 at 5:58 pm

    Ahahaha, brilliant :D

  2. skeeleron 05 Nov 2008 at 6:10 pm

    You should have seen that coming, John. The Fries Cat wouldn’t have been nearly as successful as your invention, the Bacon Cat.

  3. Kevin Ron 05 Nov 2008 at 6:21 pm

    I prefer fries with bacon. Can’t we all get along?

  4. Adam J. Whitlatchon 05 Nov 2008 at 6:25 pm

    Bacon FTW!

  5. Hectoron 05 Nov 2008 at 6:29 pm

    Bacon cheese fries…. with chili. A delicious heart attack.

  6. schaferon 05 Nov 2008 at 6:36 pm

    In the middle of such important stuff, there is still ridiculousness. I love it. Be happy it’s just the names we’re laughing at.

  7. Patrickon 05 Nov 2008 at 6:36 pm

    Oh, damn the partisanship! If Bacon and Fries can’t go together, I don’t want to live in a democracy anymore!!

  8. Chrison 05 Nov 2008 at 7:21 pm

    Betcha *that* riding used Diebold electronic voting machines. No way does my beloved starch fall that far behind bacon. That being said, bacon in poutine sounds like an awesome idea.

  9. Zed Lopezon 05 Nov 2008 at 7:29 pm

    But what if the fries were cooked in bacon grease?

  10. Davidon 05 Nov 2008 at 7:30 pm

    OK – Obama beat McCain, Republicans lost seats in the House and Senate, and Al frickin’ Frankin may even still win. All in all, that was a very bad night for my side.

    However, there is _no_ way you are taking bacon to the Democratic Party. Them’s fightin’ words.

  11. Jon S.on 05 Nov 2008 at 8:09 pm

    My god… it’s full of grease!

  12. lilacsigilon 05 Nov 2008 at 8:11 pm

    The former Premier of Tasmania was named Jim Bacon. His wife was Honey Bacon. He died of lung cancer after a lifetime of being smoky Bacon.

  13. ytimynonaon 05 Nov 2008 at 8:30 pm

    That is hilarious…can you imagine the smear campaigns both ran???

  14. Adam Rakunason 05 Nov 2008 at 9:00 pm

    BACON.

    Wrong for lunch.

    Wrong for District 14.

    (Paid for by Americans for Condiment Choice, a Coalition of Ketchup and Catsup.)

  15. Robrobbon 05 Nov 2008 at 9:43 pm

    Actually, it was mostly timing. America, tired of burgers and fries, was ready for change, and the voters of Colorado were not afraid to embrace America’s favorite food that cooks in its own fat.

  16. Madelineon 06 Nov 2008 at 12:29 am

    Bacon. Fries.

    *dissolves into giggling, sleep-deprived tears leftover from last night*

  17. Nargelon 06 Nov 2008 at 1:43 am

    Zed @ 9

    Back in the ’80s I remember a chain that cooked it’s turkey sandwitches in the same deep fat fryer that they cooked the fries in. Turkey flavored fries.

  18. ajayon 06 Nov 2008 at 6:58 am

    Bacon was obviously the target of McCain’s promises to cut pork spending…

  19. hugh57on 06 Nov 2008 at 8:27 am

    I knew Bacon was a Democrat!

  20. John Hon 06 Nov 2008 at 11:03 am

    From AP, courtesy chron.com:

    “I am so pleased that the voters appreciate the work that I have done,” Bacon said

  21. John Hon 06 Nov 2008 at 11:06 am

    Not sure why my linky didn’t work. The link is http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/bizarre/6098199.html

  22. Aelf'enon 06 Nov 2008 at 11:06 am

    Okay, but did anyone send you this link?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qL-CgzQ0FY

    (courtesy of Cherie Priest’s LJ)

  23. Dana Kingon 06 Nov 2008 at 11:32 am

    Bacon is unbeatable, espeically since Fries first name is probably French. Nothing French will ever beat an all-American food, not even in newly-purple Colorado.

  24. bionic slovanaon 06 Nov 2008 at 11:56 am

    dammit! now i desperately want bacon cheese fries with a side of ranch. curse you, john scalzi!

  25. John Hon 06 Nov 2008 at 12:31 pm

    Bacon only won because Spam wasn’t in the race.

    Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, baked beans and Spam…

  26. Steve Simmonson 06 Nov 2008 at 5:55 pm

    I googled to see if this was merely a good joke or an actual race, and turned up a page with a link that seemed to be labelled “Bacon Eats Fries In First Debate.” Turned out it was actually “Bacon Beats Fries In First Debate.” Link: http://www.denverpost.com/election/ci_10907268?source=data

  27. Tullyon 06 Nov 2008 at 11:56 pm

    Journey beat Bacon for District Judge here in Kansas.

    But a trip versus a snack is different from a snack versus a snack.

  28. hackworthlesson 07 Nov 2008 at 6:55 am

    but fries with cheese and bacon? beyond heart-stoppingly awesome!

  29. Chris Johnstonon 10 Nov 2008 at 7:45 pm

    Y’know, John, I finally got hold of some of that Bacon Saltâ„¢ you’ve been touting… Used it up in about a week!

  30. Conallon 12 Nov 2008 at 2:20 pm

    Come on now, that wasn’t a fair fight. Everyone knows that Bacon is the unbeatable champion of the world!

    http://www.chickenmonkeydog.com

Comments RSS

Leave a Reply (See: Comment Policy)