Nov 06 2009

Previously:
Ahead:

Away With Me!

Published by John Scalzi at 10:35 am

Events of the day conspire to keep me from conversing with you via transmission of electrical particles through this system known as “Teh IntarWeebs”! And what events are these? And do they involve tapioca pudding, a polka version of the hit song “Head Like a Hole,” and between two and six stoats and/or ferrets? I cannot say! What I can say is I’m likely to be out for most if not all of the day. Try to get along without me for as long as you possibly can. And when you can’t, well, maybe I’ll put something on my Twitter feed. Maybe. I make no promises. Stoat handling is hard work.

 

27 responses so far

27 Responses to “Away With Me!”

  1. tomon 06 Nov 2009 at 10:44 am

    Clearly JS has been stoat juggling again…requiring yet another trip to the emergency room as well as the 24-hr vet. Please stand by…

  2. John Scalzion 06 Nov 2009 at 10:50 am

    Stoat juggling is not illegal in the states where it is allowed. REMEMBER THAT.

  3. benon 06 Nov 2009 at 10:59 am

    Stoats? Someone has be rereading his Brian Jacques books.

  4. BeVibeon 06 Nov 2009 at 11:01 am

    I vote for stoat & ferret juggling while doing the polka in a giant vat of tapioca pudding.

    Or eating Tapioca Pudding while juggling and dancing. That would be fun, too. :)

  5. Marc Moskowitzon 06 Nov 2009 at 11:03 am

    I have friends who have performed a polka version of “Head Like A Hole” in concert.

  6. alliumon 06 Nov 2009 at 11:07 am

    Stoats? Really?

    Always took you for a cotaimundi man myself.

  7. John Scalzion 06 Nov 2009 at 11:14 am

    I didn’t say they were my stoats.

  8. Captain Buttonon 06 Nov 2009 at 11:16 am

    Is stoat juggling the same as monkey dancing for tax purposes?

  9. Alternative Eric S.on 06 Nov 2009 at 11:18 am

    What’s wrong with those stoats? It’s ermine season! Tell them to get busy on their winter coats or they’re raptor food.

  10. Dave Hon 06 Nov 2009 at 11:26 am

    Just wash your hands when you are done.

  11. ruthlingon 06 Nov 2009 at 11:41 am

    wash what’s left of your hands in any case… weasels got teeth!

  12. Stewart Butleron 06 Nov 2009 at 12:00 pm

    Ferrets, pudding, and NiN? Not the first combination I would’ve come up with…

    An explanation is required. Have you been abusing the cough syrup again?

  13. Steve Burnapon 06 Nov 2009 at 12:09 pm

    Ferrets, but Weezer instead of NIN: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3xAeTmsJfg

  14. Stewart Butleron 06 Nov 2009 at 12:12 pm

    @Steve: That explains it. I think.

    Thanks.

  15. John Sandwich Guyon 06 Nov 2009 at 12:30 pm

    So I can say I knew you in your stoatage.

  16. GL2418 (AKA Michael)on 06 Nov 2009 at 12:39 pm

    OK. Now that I have Googled stoats. I officially have not snappy comments to make.

  17. zakuron 06 Nov 2009 at 12:44 pm

    With enough digging we can ferret out what’s really going on here. Scalzi can’t weasel out of this one. I mink it!

  18. Jeff Zugaleon 06 Nov 2009 at 1:10 pm

    “And there was much rejoicing, and the people feasted upon the lamb, and the stoat…”

    Mmm. Yummy stoat. :)

  19. Barstool Babeon 06 Nov 2009 at 2:35 pm

    Admit it, you’re out blowing dead leaves around.

  20. Thomason 06 Nov 2009 at 2:52 pm

    Now, a polka version of “Head Like a Hole” I’d listen to.

  21. BeVibeon 06 Nov 2009 at 3:12 pm

    19. BarStool Babe – Nah – his father in law does the yard work. He has a riding lawn mower!

  22. frooniumon 06 Nov 2009 at 3:32 pm

    *hopes there’s no invocation of rule 34*

    doh!

  23. Xopheron 06 Nov 2009 at 4:01 pm

    What’s wrong with those stoats? It’s ermine season! Tell them to get busy on their winter coats or they’re raptor food.

    Fun fact: even Arctic and subArctic critturs who are at the very top of their food chain grow white coats in the winter.

    The white fur isn’t so much for concealment as for warmth, because white hair has more airspace due to its lack of pigment.

    So, see, it’s not that I’m aging…it’s just that winter’s comin’ on!

  24. TheMadLibrarianon 06 Nov 2009 at 5:26 pm

    I will see your stoat juggling (with or without accompanying tapoica) and raise you an unannounced class of 4th graders coming in to the library for storytime and research. Really, the teacher should have at least made the effort to call in advance.

  25. Robrobbon 06 Nov 2009 at 10:09 pm

    I was briefly distracted by the polka, then the common thread became apparent. There is only one thing in common between misplaced polka arrangements, tapioca and vicious varmints, and that is…

    Weird Al Yankovic.

    We now know something of your secret meeting. Rest assured, we will learn the rest. I, for one, am jealous.

  26. Peter Mcon 07 Nov 2009 at 8:28 am

    Stoat juggling? Lightweights.

    Here in Yorkshire there are still enclaves of ferret legging, although it is not as popular a sport as it was when we had many coal mines and steel works when men were men and a mustelid chewing on one’s knackers was considered nowt.

    The rules: A man puts a ferret down his trousers against the clock. The winner is the man who keeps the ferret down his kecks the longest.

    I am not making this up.

  27. Tinkeron 07 Nov 2009 at 12:55 pm

    4 hamster and a roll of duct tape.

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