My Wife’s New Toy

We got the new mower a week ago, but fate (and rain) kept it and my wife apart. No longer! Here she is, happily ensconced in its chair, subjecting the lawn to its first whirring slice-ination of the year. As you might be able to guess from her expression, shortly after I took this picture she tried to run me down with the machine. The life of John Scalzi, Domestic Paparazzi, is a dangerous one.

34 thoughts on “My Wife’s New Toy

  1. just wait until she starts to “accessorize” her new best friend…I see a back-hoe, a utility trailer, perhaps a post hole digger accessory and hmmmm, perhaps a wood chipper – and we all know what a wood chipper is good for…getting rid of the body and keeping your lawn nice and green using your own organic goodness. I mean geeze anyone ever bother to watch Fargo? Those folks knew how to use a wood chipper.

  2. John, I can see she’s not wearing noise headphones, but please tell me she’s wearing ear plugs.

  3. wow, no wonder I cost so much I think I had bought cars smaller than that. Honestly it looks bigger than my gen1 FIAT Panda.

  4. John Scalzi (singular) is a papparazo(singular).

    Unless, of course, you have a twin you haven’t mentioned…

  5. Can I just say how AWESOME that is?? I wish I had a tractor like that to mow ANY lawn with.

    My SIL looked at me strangely when I waxed rhapsodic one day over how much I’d like to drive one of those big lawnmowers where you stand on the little platform behind the actual mower. I have no idea why she thought that was strange.

  6. Janice in GA:

    How about if Segway made a mower? I have to admit to a mower fetish myself.

  7. I don’t get to do our lawn as often as I’d like, but after last night’s bout with ol’ shakerattle’n’roll, I can admit to a serious case of Mower Envy here.

  8. That is indeed a nice mower (Though we were always John Deere people when I was in charge of our three acres back home), but the first thing I noticed was WOW your wife’s got some gams on her! How tall is she? (Asked with humble respect.)

  9. The life of John Scalzi, Domestic Paparazzi, is a dangerous one.

    But if she succeeded in her attempt, the life of John Scalzi, Domestic Pepperoni, would not be much of a life at all.

  10. Shouldn’t she raise the “Rollover Protection System”? That’d be more prudent, even if the lawn isn’t very hilly, you never know…

  11. John: How did she like the machines performance? Your previous machine had a much wider cutting swath as I recall. Does the increased traveling speed of this machine equal or better the previous amount of time needed for a cutting?

    And the recent ratio of cat photos to machinery photos is just spectacular! Not that I expect it to continue mind you, I’ll just enjoy it while I can.

  12. Weird. I’ve been hanging around Whatever for — what — four years now and had no idea that you had any neighbors that close. My brain had just filled in the same buffer zone that we see in the front lawn pictures as applying in all directions.

  13. So you got the deal Jeff O got? His new wife (at the time long-term girlfriend/fiancee) wanted a house. He didn’t. So he said, well, “if you want a house you have to do the yardwork.”

    Her response was, “you bet!”

    I didn’t know this until someone (after they moved in and were having a party) said, ‘hey, Jeff, why’s your lovely fiancee out mowing the yard?” (He lived with us for a bit after moving back to KC from a forlorn part of Kansas, and always helped with house and yard stuff.)

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