So, here’s what my brain says to me when I write a certain amount of words of fiction in a day.
500 words (or less): YOU DO NOT GET TO EAT YOU WORTHLESS TOAD.
1,000 words: You’re a slacker. Do better tomorrow.
2,000 words: You’ve hit quota! Have a donut.
3,000 words: ZOMG TODAY SIR YOU WERE ON FIRE.
4,000 words: Whoa, dude. Nice run, but you keep doing this, you’ll collapse a brain lobe.
5,000 words (or above): UUUUNNNGH FLOOOOBA GUNNA UNGH *THUNK*.
The most I’ve ever written in a single day: About 14,000 words. I pretty much slept for three days straight afterwards.
Today I wrote about 5,000 words. Flooooba gunna, dudes. Flooooba gunna, indeed.



The Blatherations of Others