43 thoughts on “Not Dead, Just Writing

  1. I’m not dead either. Half an hour more at work, then I have to prepare a humorous speech for a Toastmasters meeting later tonight. It’ll be about the perils of driving and navigating in France, and it will involve the time I asked for directions to the Holiday Inn near Charles De Gaulle Airport. They didn’t understand where I wanted to go until I adopted a bad French accent and called it the ‘Oliday Een.”

  2. Are… you sure?

    zombies almost never have the introspective capacity required to realize they’re zombies. Maybe you could develop a “How do I know if I’ve become a zombie?” test, and then administer it upon yourself. Granted, there are scientific issues with this approach, using yourself as a test subject being one, and… well… zombies being another. But still. Some scientific rigor is better than none. It’s also better than rigor mortis. So, there’s that.

    Personally, I know I’m not a zombie because when I die, on my deathbed, I will receive total consciousness.

    So, I got that going for me, which is nice.

  3. How are you?
    Heh? Man, you must be strapped for time. How are you. Actually, I would’ve liked ‘Mingle. Discuss’ better, but that’s just me–crusty aging man. Seriously? Don’t apologize. You got work to do. Get on the snake, dude. We all benefit from your work. Keep the joy coming, Mr. Scalzi.

  4. I’m dead. Not literally, mind you, but Monday is always hectic for me.
    I’m afraid I’m unavailable for any zombie armies, however, as I have another hour of studying before I can eat, but luckily it’s my partner’s night to cook. Yay!

    On the sunny side, my younger cousin passed his first black belt test this evening. Not at our school, he’s studying Brazilian jujitsu which we don’t teach, but go him.

  5. Also not dead. And neither is my garden; I have bountiful seedlings. Waiting for a huge pot of chicken soup to be done. Having a pretty good day.

  6. Not dead. Just fighting the temptation to ask you whether the plot hole that bothers me in OMW is really a plot hole or a subtle indication of just how evil the human galactic empire is without saying it outright.

    Also, Redshirts barely passes the Bechdel test and plot-wise it should do better. Won’t complain further lest I spoiler.

  7. See, this is what you get for raising expectations by updating every day. If you were lazier, people would leave you alone.

    On the other hand, if you ever get kidnapped the police will know VERY QUICKLY. “Chief, I have a horde of people trying to file a missing persons report who say they read whatever — I don’t know what that means, but I think some scifi dude has been abducted. Possibly by aliens.”

  8. I just put “whatever blog” in the search box and the first entry was NOT yours.

    What’s happened to the world?

    Other than that, pretty good.

    @Dave Branson – just finished up our humorous contest tonight. Good luck with your speech!

  9. Pretty okay. I’m cycling manic, so I thought it was a GREAT idea to walk four miles today, in heels. Whee. It was pretty much fine, but it took me a while to realize that the Packers were in town, for a sporting even against the local Seahawks. Judging by the jerseys that I saw, the home team is out-numbered 4:1. Fascinating.

  10. Something to make you feel a little less zombified, John. Best tweet *ever*, on Wil Wheaton’s Twitter feed:: “Me: I want a Blue Hawaiian. Anne: The drink? Me: No, a Smurf. Like Jokey, but Hawaiian. Anne: He’d be AlohaHa Smurf. “

  11. I might just be dead. 12 straight hours of focused concentration in public settings has at least turned my introvert self into a gibbering idiot.

  12. Out of curiousity … *how* do they expect you to reply if you *are* dead? Seems like a flaw in their plan – it’s easy to confirm a negative (“John Scalzi not dead, says Internet-famous cat posting on his account”) but very hard to confirm a positive (“John Scalzi is dead and Ghlaghghee did it”).

  13. “He’s not dead, he’s pining for the fjords” How did we get to 32 comments before someone made use of this line? You guys are slipping.

  14. I can’t believe someone thought you were dead yesterday. Obviously you had to spend the day preparing the compound for the inevitable Wheaton retalitory invasion.

  15. As I am locked in a box with a strange poison contraption, my state of death is impossible to determine. I am both dead and not dead.

    Oh, huh, this poison might actually just be a cookie. Omnomnom. Still in a box though.

  16. Well, today I’m relieved after seeing the news:

    A near tragedy averted at the International Space Station when presidential candidate Mitt Romney made a surprise visit yesterday. Witnesses say the Republican presidential nominee shouted “Why do engineers hate fresh air!” before head butting the window causing a rapid decompression of the crew capsule. Luckily, the suction pulled Romney’s head through the porthole, up to his shoulders, sealing the leak long enough for the rest of the crew to evacuate to an adjacent capsule behind an airlock.

    Crewmembers then donned space suits to retrieve Mr. Romney and seal the hole. Technicians on board the space station said Mr. Romney was fine after performing a softboot on his systems, recalibrating a couple of his sensors, and applying a new coat of fiberglass to his hairpiece.

  17. Really, after all the bacon turmoil yesterday someone was concerned you have not posted? Seriously, some of the fans here are pathetic.

  18. The great thing about you being not-dead is during the “predicted” zombie apocalypse, you won’t be at the door asking to “borrow a cup of brains.”
    Cat/bacon video made up for your lack of quantity through quality.

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