Come around and see me. And visit my tiny little hometown. You know you’ve always wanted to. I will definitely be reading from my upcoming novel Lock In, and reading something different than I read at Worldcon, so if you show up you will literally be the first humans on Earth to hear what I’ll be reading. Indeed, the first humans in the entire universe. No one will ever be able to take that from you!
Also, you can pet my Best Novel Hugo if you want, since I will be bringing it to the library. Also also, there will be books for you to buy, if you wish, and I will sign them. To you, or whomever you designate. Also also also: Snacks. Snacks, people. So there: if you live within a 50-mile radius, you now have no reason not to show up.
See you there!