Posted on May 20, 2003 Posted by John Scalzi 12 Comments
Heavy rains are cutting into my ability to stay connected to the Internet through my satellite modem. Apparently it must be raining in space as well. Thereby, updates today may be sporadic if at all. Don’t blame me, blame the position of this planet in an orbit that allows for liquid water.
So many of our problems would be solved if not for that pesky orbit and the presence of water in three states.
Bill, you obviously forgot its even more wretched fourth state: on the brain.
Hey now! Without water, there’d be huge, world wide scale problems! For example, how would I be able to make macaroni and cheese? Think of Kraft before making these silly wishes, man!
So you’re willing to expose the entire world to the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide (http://www.dhmo.org/) just so that you can have your precious mac & cheese? Have you no shame?
Actually, I believe that water is available in all 50 states.
From the looks of it, there may be a shortage of water in Texas if we don’t get some of it pouring out of the skies soon: http://www.cpc.ncep.noaa.gov/
If someone wants to send some rain in the direction of Houston, I’d be more than happy to take it. Especially if it keeps me from having to give up Kraft mac and cheese.
Hmmm, well, it seems to me the big problem here seems to be water falling from the sky. So, the logical thing to do would just be to destroy the sun. No sun, no evaporating water, no rain. While we’re at it, we may as well just get rid of the moon as well. I get a headache keeping track of all these high and low tide things.
I really don’t understand the problem. I mean, John has an umbrella, right?
So prop it up over the dish and upload away.
Since the beginning of time, mankind has yearned to destroy the sun!
“Since the beginning of time, mankind has yearned to destroy the sun!”
I saw that movie!
Well, actually they were just blocking out the sun from the whole planet. Don’t ask me to explain where the food came from, I didn’t write it.
Highlander: The Quickening
or was it “The Sickening”?
As we all know, Soylent Green is made from people. They just rounded up the sun-averse (goths, hackers, etc) and set up a breeding program. Problem solved.
Actually, I have never seen that Highlander movie. My opinion is that when it comes to Highlander movies “There can be only One”. I was thinking of Monty Burns.