Posted on February 11, 2005 Posted by John Scalzi 6 Comments
Since a couple of people have asked about it to me in e-mail, a quick reminder:
I’m moderating comments more than seven days old, because that’s the easiest way to stop comment spam from actually showing up on the site. What this means is if you comment on an entry that’s more than a week old, your comment probably won’t show up right away; it’ll show up when I go through the new comments to clear up the comment spam (comment spam still comes in; it just doesn’t show up where you all see it). If a moderated comment is clearly from a human being, I’ll let it through, so, no, I’m not moderating for content (and more than I usually do, which as we all know is not much). I’m just keeping the spam out for your total reading satisfaction.
I did put in a little note about this right above the comment function pages, but I understand that people don’t always read the fine print (I don’t always, either).
On a related note, now that spam doesn’t actually show up on the site, it’s actually kind of fun to clean it out. I enjoy looking at all those Viagra and poker spams stuck in limbo before I delete them into oblivion. It’s the little things, you know?
The one small drawback is every once in a while I accidentally delete a real comment — I deleted one of my own comments this morning, which is sort of embarrassing. So if one of your comments disappears, it’s not censorship, it’s just me being clumsy. Sorry about that.
That explains what happend to my 700 word opus explaining the colossal benefits of viagra and poker in the era of Emperor Bush.
Found on http://www.bruner.net/blog/archives/011909.shtml, though heaven only knows where it started its journey.
MY NAME IS MBEKI RHODES. IN 1991 MY COUNTRY WAS INVADED, MY CAR WAS REPOSSESSED, AND MY WIFE WAS WIDOWED IN OUR ANNUAL CIVIL WAR. THIS YEAR I AM TAKING OUT A NINE MILLION DOLLAR (U.S. $9,000,000) FREE DISCOUNT MORTGAGE FINANCED ON MY EMPIRE OF HERBAL VIAGRA AND LESBIAN TEEN PORN BUSINESSES. THIS MESSAGE MAY COME AS A SURPRISE TO YOU; I GOT YOUR ADDRESS FROM A LIST OF REPUTABLE BUSINESSES AND ELIGIBLE SPEED SEDUCTION BACHELORS IN THE UNITED STATES AND CANADA. WE WANT A RELIABLE PERSON TO TRANSFER MY FAMILY’S $9,000,000 (NINE MILLION UNITED STATES DOLLARS) IN BREAST AND PENIS ENHANCEMENTS TO THE SANCTITY OF A WESTERN BANK ACCOUNT.
MY WEALTH RESULTED FROM AN AMAZING MULTI LEVEL MARKETING SCAM IN WHICH I OFFER THAT YOU MAY PARTICIPATE. BY ASSISTING MY HUMBLE FARMING AND GOVERNMENT CORRUPTION FAMILY IN TRANSFERING OUR BREAST AND PENIS DEVICES YOU BECOME ELIGIBLE FOR THE NIGERIAN OVERSEAS LOTTERY, WITH A TOP PRIZE OF FIFTY MILLION LASER PRINTER TONER CARTRIDGES OF YOUR CHOICE. YOU TOO CAN BECOME AN INTERNATIONAL SHIPPING AND BRIBERY MAGNATE !!!
*** Real Celebrities! Real Neuticles! See Yourself as Naked as Them!
IF WE REACH AN AGREEMENT WITH NO DISAPPOINT ON YOUR PART, YOU WILL PROVIDE UNTO US YOUR BANK ACCOUNT NUMBER, SOCIAL SECURITY / IDENTITY NUMBER, AND FIRST BORN BABY KITTEN. I WILL REQUIRE AN ADVANCE FEE OF FIFTY INFLATABLE LOVE SHEEP AND FORTY POUNDS OF HUMAN GROWTH HORMONE TO COVER THE BRIBERY OF OUR MINISTRY OF DISCOUNT PILLS. I WILL THEN EFT TRANSFER NINE MILLION DOLLARS IN BREAST IMPLANTS AND HOMOSEXUAL WOMEN TO YOUR ACCOUNT.
CHALLENGE YOURSELF TO THE INTERNATIONAL AFRICAN TRADERS’ GUILD ONLINE CASINO! http://WWW.SCAM-ME-HARDER.COM/TRACKING.PHP?FRAUDSTER-O-RAMA&11A3 THESE ARE REAL FARM GIRLS GETTING DIRTY WITH AFRICAN OIL BUREAUCRATS !!!
YOU WILL FORWARD 50% PERCENT OF THE TRANSFERED IMPLANTS TO MY COUSIN, NGAM’AO RALSKY IN PENSACOLA FLORIDA. 10% PERCENT WILL BE USED TO PAY THE PIPER. YOU WILL KEEP THE OTHER 40% PERCENT AS YOUR TRANSFER FEE AND REWARD FOR CLICKING THE MONKEY.
THIS MESSAGE IS NOT “ SPAM ”. IT IS DELIVERED IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE GALACTIC SENATE BILL 1618 REGULATING THE FREE TRADE IN ELECTRONIC PENIS AND FREE VACATION BONUS. YOU OR SOMEONE YOU LOVE ” OPTED IN ” TO THESE SPECIAL OFFERS. YOU TOO CAN SEDUCE HUNDREDS OF WILLING TEENAGE LESBIANS AT HOME !!! IN YOUR SPARE TIME !!!
*** Earn FREE AIRLINE MILES by STUFFING ENVELOPES !!! Or NAKED WIVES !!!
FORWARD THIS MESSAGE TO FIVE OF YOUR BEST AND MOST TRUSTED BUSINESS ASSOCIATES — DO NOT BREAK THE CHAIN — AND YOU WILL RECEIVE PERFECT LUCK AND PERFECT SEX !!! JOHN WHORFIN OF GROVERS MILL NEW JERSEY BROKE THE CHAIN, AND HE DIED THE NEXT DAY OF ACUTE PENIS REMOVAL !!! CHAINSAW
*** THIS IS NOT A JOKE *** THIS IS NOT A HOAX *** DELETING THIS EMAIL
*** WITHOUT CLICKING THROUGH TO THREE ADVERTISING LINKS CONSTITUTES A
*** VIOLATION OF THE FIRST AMENDMENT *** AND FRAUD *** EAT YOUR SPAM OR
*** WE WILL LAWSUITE YOU *** HARD *** HARDER *** OH YES YES *** BOY ***
TO UNSUBSCRIME FROM THIS FABULOUS AND MIND BLOWING SEX OFFER, PLEASE CLICK ONCE (DO NOT DOUBLE CLICK) ON THE LINK BELOW. PLEASE ADVISE THAT THESE SPECIAL OFFERS ARE ONE TIME OFFERS AND WILL NOT DISCONTINUE.
DISCOUNT PETROLEUM AND PENIS OF NIGERIA, INC.
LAGOS, NIGERIA 419
Oh God, I just about died laughing.
What sucks so bad is that now I want to send that to all my friends, but they’d have to be surfing the next cyber-naked to get that through even the flimsiest tissu-paper filter. Crud. It’s the perfect non-transferable viral email.
*chuckle* Just warn them ahead of time that it’s coming, they’ll often be able to go fish it back out of a spam folder.
Re: Pimping of OMW. My simple comment is, so? Your point? Is one not supposed to be excited or proud. Is one not supposed to openly hope for and bring about the success of his own creation?
It’s refreshing to see your wide open approach to this instead of the toe-shuffling “aw shucks, it was nuthin'” approach of the politically correct.
I loved the book, by the way. It had a bit of that same irreverence.