A Minor Domestic Incident, As Related By Krissy
Posted on September 2, 2006 Posted by John Scalzi 30 Comments
“Well, it all started when Athena wanted a piece of cheese. So I got the block of colby jack from the fridge, put it on the cheeseboard, and started slicing.”
“Then, as I was slicing myself a piece, it occured to me — hey, this isn’t my usual cheeseboard.”
“So I picked it up to look at the back –”
“Uh-oh.”
“This never would have happened with a Hugo.”
*snerk.*
Hey, at least you know it’s got practical applications… I wonder if oscar winners ever use their oscars as paperweights.
No, see, with the Hugo I think you take half an orange and twiddle it on the pointy end, then the juice runs down the fins and — oh, hell, what do I know…?
Funny thing about one’s perspective: When I saw the word “incident” and the knife, I flashed on Krissy was about to lose a fingertip. That’s cause I don’t have good luck with knives. Or saws. Or X-Actos. [sigh]
After Krissie’s comments re: groping, I was worried.
It’s their fault for making the award match your green and wood-grain kitchen decor so perfectly.
Athena’s face in shot number two is priceless. What with that and the infamous Cthulu video, I think she’s destined for cinematic greatness…she certainly knocks the hell out of most British television actors for range of expression.
Which, I’ll grant you, isn’t saying much…
…congratulations, by the way. The tiara was most fetching.
laughing my ASS off!
By the way, who’s the large furry quadraped in the background?
That’s Kodi, our akita.
Clearly this has been staged for camera, as that kind of knife can’t possibly slice Colby. This proves that this blog, and all of its readers, hate America.
What I don’t understand is how the shiny front part of the award got all scratched up when she was clearly using the back side as a cutting board.
Great to see you at Worldcon, BTW. I’m working on that non-fiction book, I swear.
You’d better be!
This is known in the movie industry as a “blooper.” ;-)
It’s not scratched up! It’s supposed to look that way! Honest!
Funny, it doesn’t look that way in the entry “Look What I Got.” ;-)
.hack fan, eh?
Comedy gold.
I’d like to know what other winners have done with their plaques in the past.
Alas, one mystery remains unsolved!? Where’s the cutting board? Hmmmm, bet it’s hanging in the Den on the wall!! LOL, silly mistake anyone could have made it..
My boyfriend and I both think Athena’s got mighty fine acting chops. I showed him Athena’s first day at school, and he was terribly impressed.
…it slices, dices, makes julian fries…order now and we’ll throw in the final version of the book you’re supposed to be working on…
I seem to remember hearing Gene Wolfe once say that Hugos could be used as potato mashers . . .
That’s some funny sight gaggin’ that is. That you got Chrissy in on it is awesome, too.
I showed my daughter (who is the same age as Athena) the Chtulu and 1st day of school videos. I then said, “Do you think you’d like to make funny movies like that?” Her face lit up like I’d said, “Here’s $3,000. Let’s go to Toys R Us.”
You’ve been warned.
Hey now I know where Athena gets all her GREAT expressions!!!!!
Great cheeseboard you got there bro(((wink)))
DonBoy: Best comment ever.
Was it dishwasher safe?
It seems unlikely that we will find out, I must say.
Josh Jasper:
I think that’s what the dog is for.
You should have photoshop-ed the tea-towel out, John. It was a dead giveaway. Reminds me of reading the “Three old guys discuss how they want to die” joke as I was reading my K. Briggs “Mythology and Faire Tales” and stumbled across it. I knew the ending, couldn’t believe I was going there, but just had to keep reading because you just can’t take your eyes off it.
Next thing you know you’ll be going to the local Denny’s wearing the diadem expecting the waiters to taste your food before you dig in. :)
Dork.
You say that like it’s a bad thing.
Actually, it’s 100% jealousy talking. Not for the cheese board but for the partners in crime…
Re-reading that I think I should have made it clearer that the above jealousy was not, you know, in a creepy way…