Avast! Here Be a Scurvy Lass
Posted on September 19, 2006 Posted by John Scalzi 19 Comments
Athena, apparently eager on Talk Like a Pirate Day to replicate the visage of a scurvy-afflicted 17th century sailor, went and lost two teeth today, one on top and one on bottom, the latter coming out after she went to bed and the previous tooth had been nabbed by the “tooth fairy” (while Athena was still awake, how sneaky is that). The tooth fairy’s lookin’ for a Hamilton now, since the current tooth bounty is $4, and you gotta figure there’s a $2 bonus in a two tooth day.
Argh, not the tooth fairy! Argh there’s this matey I met at ye ol’ pirate swaggerin souree name be a Graham Joyce. He too had eyes of steel and a pen full of ink. Wrote this’in tome ’bout a tooth fairy, arg. Never has a scurvier dog been seen. although, given’t the fair share bounty on teeth she has, I figure her such a beast is a different one that matey Graham’s were.
Man, I rememebr when I got pocket change form that tooth fairy. Back in the 70’s. Now I gotta shell out $3-$4 sometimes. Teeths is expensive. And the time when we were visiting Maine and stil lived in Massachusetts when she lost a tooth? Damn! TF had to pay out for the tooth in both states! It was liek $7!!! That’s a Republican Administration for ya!
Oh, sorry! Arrrr, tooth fairies be expensive.
Wow, that’s way up from the $.25 I got more my teeth as I recall. I’m guessing teeth are not tied to core inflation.
Er… Athena has teeth on her “buttom”?
I don’t think I want to know….
Wow, does she ever look like Krissy in that picture. No, not because of the teeth! Geez.
Nice change of background…and Athen’s killer cute.
Even better than finishing a book, methinks.
(last pirate talk, i swear).
Aye, she’s a comely lass, she is! Ye got away cheap.
(hey, 35 minutes left to Pirate Day, so I could…)
Four buck for a tooth? Man, I guessing living in rural Ohio doesn’t lower *all* expenses. We still get away with a shiny gold Sacajawea (sp?) dollar
$2 for a tooth? If my kids got $2 for a tooth when they were younger, I guarantee they’d be yanking out all of their teeth with pliers to earn even more.
$4 Dollars a tooth? That’s a hefty amount of dough for a tooth. We do the Sacagawea gold dollar as well.
My son came into my room one day and said “Did you know that the tooth fairy has ignored the tooth under my pillow for three nights in a row?”
D’oh!
So that night, not only did he get a dollar, he got a nice, handwritten, signed note from TTF, apologizing for the delay. There had been a terrible rush of teeth lost in Europe, as I recall.
He kept the note in a place of honor for a year.
Anonymous,
Nearly the same thing happened at my house. That is further proof that the tooth fairy is overworked, although I heard she got out-sourced and the foreign replacements have let the quality slip downwards.
One year my daughter lost the tooth in question at school, and was very disappointed that she had nothing to tempt the tooth fairy with. I told her to write a note explaining what happened and to put it under her pillow. She got the money, and the “tooth fairy” still as the note…
The going rate in New Jersey is $5 – must be a cost of living thing.
Also, my son was very upset (even upon receiving the $5) that the tooth fairy took the tooth. His summer camp gave him a plastic “tooth box” to hold it in, and he was very fond of it.
Little known fact: when the tooth fairy gives the child money, she also gives the tooth to the parents for safekeeping. Good thing, too – prevented a meltdown at my house…
I have one of those nifty plastic tooth-shaped boxes, too! (I think I must have gotten it from my dentist.) Happily, the TF didn’t take the box, just the tooth. So I still have it (after multiple uses).
And I must also add my “whoa!” to the tooth fairy inflation. I better start saving now, against the eventuality of having kids in the future…
My nephew started losing his baby teeth last year. When he lost the first one, and he was telling my parents about it, he said, ” . . . And it was my favorite tooth, too!”
My brain first read “Hamilton” as “Hamiltonian”.
Perhaps instead of quarters, quaternions. Which is appropriate since the tooth fairy is complex, having real and imaginary components.
After all, Athena’s been doing calculus since kindergarten…
WOW THATS GREAT I MEMBA WEN ME,MY SISTERS,AND BROTHERS ONLY GOT 50 CENT TO A DOLAR FOR BOTH OR ONE TOOTH.She is a *************LUCKY ONE************