In The Air Tonight
Posted on January 7, 2007 Posted by John Scalzi 64 Comments
No, I’m not channeling Phil Collins, just noting I’ll be flying back home tonight and will be back in Ohio tomorrow. Stay strong until then. And in the meantime, one more open thread, with the following starter topic: You can ban one overexposed artist/song from radio for ten years. Which artist/song is it?
You may imagine that I would be nominating Phil Collins. Oh, my, yes.
See you all tomorrow.
While I respect your opinion of Phil, I kind of like the quirky dude — and wish I had the time & money to go to Helsinki when Genesis kicks off their European tour. (grin)
I mainly listen to WLAV Classic Rock on the road and they don’t play too many duds. And some of the more obnoxious people in the world self-destruct — consider Paris Hilton’s “singing” career. I guess I’m tired of anything with Jessica Simpson.
Dr. Phil
Although I do despise the way Paris Hilton somehow became famouse, I do like that song that was out on the radio a few months back. I have no idea how it goes or the name of it but it was pretty catchy.
On the Simpson front…Jessica Simpson doesn’t bother me as much as her sister Ashley Simpson. She should be banned for life from the human race and not just music.
I would ban the The Village People, esp. “YMCA”. God, I hate that song.
anything and everything to do with Beyonce Knowles.
please.
I am about to get majorly flamed.
I would ban Stairway to Heaven. The most overrated song in the history of mankind.
Celine Dion. Yes, I would love to never hear ‘My Heart Will Go On’ again. Ever. Not even on the flutophone, as we have so patiently lived through as our children go through music class.
The US National Anthem…why stop at ten years? Ban it forever like the festering appendiceal hollow vestige of ironic hypocrisy it has become. Rockets red glare indeed.
Just one? Well I guess I’d flip a coin to decide between Whitney Houston and Michael Bolton.
What! I can only ban ONE? (grumble, grumble). Okay then, Mariah Carey. Hands down. Little would give me greater pleasure than to never ever hear her howling, bone-hurting, glass-shattering, orbit-altering, global-warming inducing, terrorist-enabling, earth-piercing warble of a “voice” again, or to never see an entire News spot devoted to her latest eating disorder, nervous breakdown, new boy friend, break up, clothing or lack thereof, or “Comeback” album. Also, I demand that the word “Diva” be deleted from the human lexicon, in any language.
For the past decade I’ve mostly listened to NPR and classical, folk, and bluegrass music.
This is because when I listen to commercial stations I want to rip the radio out of my dashboard in a Jophn Belusi smashing the guitar against the wall kind of way.
Steve Buchheit, I’m with you, Man. If it wasn’t for NPR I probably wouldn’t even own a radio. On the other hand, MP3 players are a pretty cool invention, I can dump a couple of hours of Mark Knofler or Tom Waits on to a memory stick and plug it into the Bose system in my truck for the daily commute into Anchorage. No smart ass DJ’s, no adds, ahhh now that’s technology that enhances my life.
Knopfler, damnit, dropped the “p” somewhere in the bit stream.
I would ban Britney Spears. I must never hear her voice again.
Jim, I agree, and if it weren’t for internet streaming and my iPod I think I’d go stir crazy at work (radio reception in a cinder brick building, it would be an understatement to say that the only station that comes through is so bad I would rather listen to cats being shaved).
Gwen Stefani. Yeah, she was good once. But, it’s time to quit when your new schtick is to do pop covers of showtunes. Get off my radio.
Every time I turn on a radio to Jack FM, within an hour they seem to be playing “Jukebox Hero.” This causes me great consternation.
Lenny fucking Kravitz. Fuck that hack.
Bouncy Knowles, or whatever the frack her name is… OK, if I was that way inclined I’d screw her in a nanosecond, but I was coerced into seeing ‘Dreamgirls’ and she gave a lousy performance in a terrible film of an inexplicably over-rated show. And am I the only person bored to sobs with her fatuously ’empowered’ and ‘socially aware’ lyrics, the stripper dance moves and the dry-humping of her boyfriend at every opportunity?
She beats out Gnarl Barkley’s ‘Crazy’ simply because that ghastly song gets a half star for truth in advertising.
“God Bless the USA”. By anyone, ever. That song… oh, it is everything that is wrong with modern patriotic music. It fills me with disgust. I’ll take the Star-Spangled Banner any day. Or Sousa. I’ll take Kate Smith belting out God Bless America. But not *that*.
James Blunt “You’re Beautiful.”
I think there’s a special place in hell reserved that whimpering little simp. That song just makes me want to pour molten lead into my ears.
I was going to say Chris de Burgh and ‘Lady in Red’, but then the radio played ‘Nathan Jones’ and the answer has to be Diana Ross, and anything by her.
I was going to say Coldplay, the most overrated band of our time, then I skimmed this thread. Obviously, we need to be rescued from a world full of Celine. She, and not the others, should be expunged from musical existence.
All of the American Idols should be set upon with cheese-graters and turpentine.
John Mayer.
Tag you’re it!
http://qainsight.net/2007/01/07/Five+Things+You+Seriously+Didnt+Know+About+Me.aspx
I don’t know how often it’s played on radio, but I nominate “This is Our Country.” ****ing Mellencamp.
I’m totally with Jim Wright on the Mariah Carey nomination. Vocal acrobatics is NOT singing. She was on one of the morning shows not too long ago, and she’s even worse live.
ACCKKKKKK
I know this is heresy, but I’m Sick And Tired of the Beatles. They’re still overplayed, even though the songs are forty years old….
Aaron Neville. Listening to that man’s voice is like hearing rusty metal dragged against a pitted chalkboard.
Someone mentioned James Blunt, and I second that. So unbelievably annoying.
1. Black Eyed Peas.
2. Any starlet whose girl gadget has been exposed in public.
3. Every song played on mainstream radio in Connecticut in 1979. (Because they kept playing most of them on through the 80s and 90s.)
Kinda off topic, but does anyone actually *LIKE* those crappy PBS music specials, with Andre Rieu pap classical, or 60’s folk or doo-wop?
My biggest peeve with PBS is that during their increasingly frequent pledge drives they show crap totally unlike their normal fare which is what people like to watch on PBS. They show crap music specials for baby boomers, or crap motivational speaker infomercials, when what they should be showing is The Best of Nova/Nature/Mystery/Great Performances/Masterpiece Theater/NOW/etc.
At least public radio has it right, and runs normal programming or special pledge drive editions of the usual shows.
For a single song I would have to nominate “Red, Red Whine”, but for an artist – John friggin’ Mellancamp. I realize he’s not objectively the worst out there, but he annoys me over and over again. No other singer I know manages to make me hiss with so many different songs.
Jon H: I recently turned on PBS and, to my dismay, learned it was Pledge Week when the show turned out to be a horrific combination of Christmas Songs, Ballroom Dancing AND Lawrence Welk. All they were missing were people from Riverdance.
As for banning. Emo. All of it.
Evanescence. Remember that one girl in Choir whose “singing” was to drown everybody in class and the jackhammers outside out with her voice? That’s Amy-Lee, pretending to be Goth or Punk or whatever.
I have to go with Whitney Houston. That stupid song from The Bodyguard makes me wish I didn’t have ears.
I won’t defend Mariah Carey’s or Beyonce’s singing talents, but I will say they are both totally HAWT, and for that reason, they should not be banned. Also, Britney Spears, sometimes. However, I really don’t care if they ever actually sing again.
And I want to nominate Jon H for a Bloggy Award for the phrase “girl gadget.”
I don’t know or care who it is, but the chick whose cover of “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” made me want to go dig up John Denver just so I could shoot him for having started the song, she needs to take a hike off the airwaves and maybe a vow of silence somewhere too.
Flyleaf and “I’m so sick.” It’s the only song in recent memory that makes me turn to a different station as soon as I hear the opening. (Fortunately, that band’s popularity spike is now on the downhill, so hopefully I won’t ever have to hear it again.)
Meanwhile my current detestations are focused on Snow Patrol’s “Chasing Cars.” Awesome song on every count, including the singer’s voice – but the lyrics suck donkey balls. It makes me wish it were in a language I don’t understand.
Shania Twain’s “Feel Like A Woman.” In fact, I’d strike her from musical history and replace her with Imogene Heap.
Oh, hell. That’s seriously a tough one. I’d agree on the Collins, but I don’t think they play him on radio nearly enough to warrant a ban. The same goes for Dire Straits. James Blunt is a good call, but he’s already been banned on quite a few stations and doesn’t quite reach the same heights of irritation as a few others..
It’s no use, I can’t decide between Celine Dion and Bryan Adams.
Any and every song, from any and every iteration of, or inspired by, the soundtrack to The Big Chill.
Then, any song proclaimed a “Baby Boomer anthem”, e.g. “Layla,” “Free Bird,” “Hey, Jude,” et cetera ad nauseum.
After that, we’ll get to work on the whole sub-industry of Classic Rock radio, educational though it may be. By which I mean that thanks to one particular mullet-music station in Akron that shall remain name(WONE)less, I learned that between roughly 1972 and 1987 there were only about 38 songs recorded. That station plays them every six hours or so, whether they need to or not.
And Thena — waaah? “Have Yourself…” is like 60 years old and started with Judy Garland. Don’t blame Denver (admission: JD and the Muppets is one of my favorite holiday albums); look at all the other irritants who’ve covered the song over the years.
Anything by Guns and Roses. My radio station has played them so much it gives me a gag reflex where I reach over and turn off the radio. Any inkling of liking them is long gone. Unfortunately none of the other radio stations are worth a crap in my area. Thank god for i-pods.
Anything with Little John. In fact, pretty much the entire “Dirty South” rap movement.
1. My vague recollection is that “Nathan Jones” is post-Diana Ross.
2. PBS in fact used to have Best Of the older acclaimed series during pledge weeks; perhaps the music stuff is meant to be annoying so people pay to Get It Off. (Reference: The playing of Sousa marches during WBAI marathons.)
3. The thing I am, at least at the moment, unutterably sick of is “Come as You Are.” And why is that thing by The Fray getting played well past death?
Rap music of all kinds has no redeeming features, imo.
But if it’s to be just one song, then Sandi Thom’s ‘I wish i was a punk rocker …’ is what’s irritating me the most musically right now.
Hey, I didn’t read the question well enough, so I want a do over. Instead of Aaron Neville, I would have to go with KT Tunstall. Even a great Chicago radio station, XRT, is playing her dull lyrical nonsense ad naseum.
Guess I’m lucky to live in NYC, so there are a lot of choices of radio stations. I am forever using the remote (it was odd when I unpacked the stereo to find a remote, but y’know, the sucker is like 5 feet away from my desk, so it’s just out of reach) to change stations. For most of December, I’m pretty much stuck with tapes and CDs (those friggin’ Christmas songs). But it boils down to there isn’t much I’d need to ban from the radio. If I had to choose, it would be any (or all) of the whiny top 40 songs. You know, the songs that think they’re deep and meaningful and moving because they’re slow and whiny and dirgeful, but in reality, they just suck. Someone mentioned that Blunt “You’re Beautiful” dirge; that’s one of them.
Sting. Just his solo career, though.
Does Toby Keith count? Inasmuch as I don’t listen to any station that plays him anyway, but if I ever cross paths with him on TV, I immediately run for the remote, no matter where I am in the house or what I’m doing. I mean GAAAAAHHH! The world needs to be saved from enduring him on radio, TV, and real life as well, I imagine.
Does anyone know why Celine Dion is allowed to perform anywhere, under any circumstances? Yes, this is a free country, but one can take the idea too far.
I may hate Celine Dion and all that she stands for but I will fight to the death to protect her right to use her talent of summoning Pit Fiends to devour the souls of innocent children. Free speech isn’t free unless everyone has that right. After all, isn’t that what free speech is for? The children?
Matt, Sting’s solo career was solid–not nearly as good as his stuff with The Police, but it was such a tragic shame that he died right after the release of The Soul Cages….
What? What other albums?
NNNNN-NNNNN-NNNNN-MY-FINGERS-ARE-IN-MY-EARS-I-CAN’T-HEAR-YOU-NNNN-NNNN-NNNN-NNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!
That is a tough one, considering my overexposure to music.
I would like to ban entire genres of music, not simply one artist here or there. For the individuals who make this type of music, I have invectives such as “die in a fire” or other colorful ways to wish they would permanently go away. Banning for ten years is not enough–disco has come back with a vengeance. I hated it the first time around, and hate it this time around.
Are you an artist that plays disco? Trance? Techno? Rap? You’re probably on my hit list, and not “hit” as in “I play all the “hits” either.
I’m with Tapetum- I detest John Cougar Melonhead and all that he stands for, including macro-vacuo-cephalic morons scoring beautiful models as wives just because they can crank out the same bland, puerile song over and over again.
This idea reminds me of what I had proposed to a conservative friend of mine: every couple of months, the liberals and conservatives each get to pick one person from the other side to exile to some island without any means of communicating with the outside world. Eg: January, I make Rush Limbaugh go away for ever, he gets to ban Michael Moore, then in maybe March, I strike Ann Coulter, he dumps Al Franken, and so on.
Hmm. My least favorite overplayed song? Well, I’m sure you all know it very well, much to your distaste and eternal sorrow. My least favorite overplayed song is “In The Air Tonight” by Phil Collins. Actually. It’s all “I hate myself and want to die.” I have a low tolerance level for Phil. Or Genesis.
Also:
Simon and Garfunkel’s “Mrs. Robinson”
The Rolling Stones’s “Wild Horses”
Hilary Duff. No one else even comes close in my mind.
The thing is I used to like Melloncamp enough( not exactly headphones music but it played well when friends were around). However he really came down hard on Bob Seger when “Like a Rock” was tapped for the GMC Truck jingle. Now Melloncamp is doing the same thing with his latest music – for GMC. What happened that it is OK for him now, to do the very same thing he was opposed to years back? On the whole I like Bob Seger, but I would ban his song “Turn the Page”.
I know i’m going to get killed…but..The Eagles’,or at least ‘Hotel California.”-especially the stupid flamenco version.
There’s a flamenco version of ‘Hotel California’? Who knew?
As for who should be banned, anything by Madonna. That woman sets my teeth on edge.
There are some freaky remakes out there- last weekend, at a gas station bathroom in rural central Michigan, I heard a country remake of “They paved paradise and put up a parking lot.”
However, the most bizarre was back in ’95 or so, when I was driving through north Texas and heard a real twangy country remake of Morrissey’s “Every day is like Sunday,” where the original’s post-apocalyptic tableau becomes housewife ennui.
And although I know this is Michigan heresy, every one of Bob Seger’s songs sounds the same.
I know i’m going to get killed…but..The Eagles’,or at least ‘Hotel California.”-especially the stupid flamenco version.
You wouldn’t be referring to the Spanish-language version that appears in The Big Lebowski would you? I love that cover!
Plus, nobody f___s with the Jesus.
A few words of support for Bob Seger and John Mellencamp – cause I like them a lot.
Sure they’re gonna start sounding the same eventually – they’ve made lots of albums – and there’s nobody who changes sound/style many times and keeps their fan base for very long. U2 have gone back to their “classic” sound/style, witness their recent best of where almost all the zoo irony phase is expunged. Madonna has just reverted back to disco/dance.
I consider Mellencamp to be a generation before them and Seger the generation before that. Go back through their catalogues and (re)discover what kick-ass rockers they are/were.
I slip into Mellencamp and Seger songs like I slip on a comfortable old coat or slippers. This is an anathema to some I realise, those who like/think music has to have an edge/quirk. I like that stuff too but rock music resonates with my soul.
in the UK, Seger or Mellencamp don’t get played on the radio stations (nor were they ever, even in their heyday) so if you want to avoid them move here (but don’t ride with me in my car cause you wouldn’t like the music).
Music I could happily never hear again:
Boring rap/hip hop – i.e. that without any melody or wit in their “lyrics”
Boy/Girl band pop covers – 99.99% are so much worse than the originals.
Mariah – sorry – too much wailing up and down the scales around every note. Just sing it straight and use the wailing for an occasional accent, please!
As a footnote – if you were to ride in my car, and listen to my music, and dislike it, you’d be exactly like the rest of my family!