Categories Uncategorized Sharper Than a Serpent’s Tooth That’s it. No ice cream for Athena until 2034. Update: Someone’s always protesting. Post author By John Scalzi Post date March 17, 2007 20 Comments on Sharper Than a Serpent’s Tooth That’s it. No ice cream for Athena until 2034. Update: Someone’s always protesting. Share: By John Scalzi I enjoy pie. View Archive → ← Out in the Open (A SFWA-Related Post) → One of the Few Things I’m With the White House On 20 replies on “Sharper Than a Serpent’s Tooth” I promise not to make a response video with a raccoon holding a “Scalzi Sux” sign. Ach, die Waschbar! Well, I’m glad that spirited private citizens are willing to air their concerns with potential Scalzi leadership. Think of the racoons we can save…. Two things: How is it possible to get an entire troupe of girl scouts lost in the forest with a GPS? Didn’t your wife just clean your desk? Man, I’d forget her help in your campaign, as I’m sure you’ve been threatened with the same ass kicking we have. Disorganized. That would be the understatement of the century. Athena continues to amaze. Haah! She made me laugh out loud, wwhich is hard today as I had to deal with a moron at Apple look on the internet for my answers instead of him. Seems raccoons are upset at you. German ones at that. Now whatcha gonna do? OK, so now I’m in a bind. Before, I was perfectly content with my non-SFWA-membership status which prevented me from entering the fray. Now, I find myself convinced that I need to find a way to help Athena and keep the Scalzzzzz from wielding power (in a disorganized and generally lost fashion). The thought that is occurring to me is that us “readers” who can’t join SFWA surely outnumber the “writers”, so maybe we could organize a coup if he wins. It’s just a thought. Either that or we could sabotage the new SFWA tiara, so that we can beam radio waves and control all of his decisions and actions. (Although we should let him exercise free will while writing, otherwise we’ll run out of good stuff to read). Out of the mouth of babes… Hmm, slight misgivings seeing the level of support? Ah, yes, all fun and games while you’re throwing the handgrenades, but once you’re on the receiving end, things change. I fell your pain, brother. Co-conspirator: “Now that we got rid of the bastards on council, two of us have to step forward to replace them. Volunteers?” Me: “Hey, where’d everybody go?” Co-conspirator: “Congrats, Steve, you’re now on council.” Me: “Rats.” Oh, and racoon, you have to stew, not grill. Possum is better, though. Woodchuck you need a few days to marinade. Now, squirrel, them’s good grillin’, but you need a bunch of them to make a meal. You’d be surprised how fast you get full on worms though. A cuskerchuck, noww there’s some fine eating. Days in preparation, but worht the wait. A Maine delicacy. Ask for it wherever Maine foods are sold. Raccoon for eating, huh? Not so far fetched! The American Legion Hall in Delafield WI holds an annual “Raccoon Feed” at the end of January. See writeup here: http://lthforum.com/bb/viewtopic.php?t=11375&highlight=raccoon+feed Some braised varmint from one of these feeds was then used as one course a tasting menu at Moto, a Chicago avant-garde restaurant helmed by Homaru Cantu, an Iron Chef callenger. Sir, Your daughter cracks me up. Maybe she should run as Vice President to reign in your confused ways. That sounds like a great campaign slogan. “John Scalzi: He Gets Girl Scouts Lost in the Forest.” I swear to god, Athena needs her own blog. Did she use the iMac for that? My nephew uses my dad’s MacBook to record pretend world-war 2 dramas. Bwah-ha-ha. Chang: “Seems raccoons are upset at you. German ones at that. Now whatcha gonna do?” Those are not German Racoon’s. They are Bavarian. Never call a Bavarian racoon a German or else you are at risk of the Bavarian Alpine Tuba band coming to your door at 3:30a. Believe me. It’s painful… Seems you have about as much support from your kids as Giuliani has from his… We need an update for the Athena axe-wielding picture, to reflect her actual support for her dad. “Don’t vote for my dad, or I’ll hit you with this axe!” or perhaps the slightly long “Don’t vote for my dad, or I’ll chop you up like the raccoon my Girl Scout troop had to eat when he got us lost in the woods despite using a GPS! (How is that even possible?)” I second the “Athena needs her own blog”. Seriously. Now, did Athena REALLY make this all on her own, or did she have some help from Daddy this time around? “Now, did Athena REALLY make this all on her own, or did she have some help from Daddy this time around?” My 7 year old nephew figured out, all on his own (at least, I didn’t show him), how to get iMovie on my dad’s MacBook to record from the built-in camera. Now whenever he’s at my father’s house, he’s making “Band of Brothers” ww2 movies with him as the star. Athena! Just get a livejournal! You can update via text messages and undermine him from across the internet while you’re at school! oh dear dog, your daughter is hilarious (in a good way). And don’t worry, I can beat that story about girl scout mishaps. My leader did far, far, far worse when I was a Junior Scout. Comments are closed.