Fun Fact For the Day

President Bush is giving a speech right now, about 20 miles from where I’m sitting! Indeed, it’s entirely possible that one of my nieces, who goes to school in Tipp City (where he’s at) is listening to him blather on.

Another of my nieces asked me yesterday, apropos to a discussion of his imminent arrival, if I would want to hear him speak. I told her that given Bush’s propensity for not speaking except in front of vetted crowds, I found it very unlikely I would be let into the auditorium at all. Which in some sense would be amusing, but then not so much when I got put on a watch list and banned from boarding planes. I’ve got traveling to do soon, you know.

Anything exciting going on where you are?

30 Comments on “Fun Fact For the Day”

  1. Can’t spend too much time bragging about how exciting things are right now: I’m too busy fending off NINJAS!

  2. changterhune – Before you hear lies from Chang Terhune himself, we thought we’d tell you the truth: without us, his old action figures, he’d be nowhere. He loved science fiction from way back and began reading it at an early age, but it was through us that he acted it all out. That’s what led to the writing. He watched a lot of science fiction shows like Star Trek, U.F.O, and movies, too. But we were always there to do his bidding. And it’s like they say: you always forget about the little people on your way up. Oh, the 70’s and early 80’s with him were good times! He’d use these blocks and make all the crazy buildings for us to be in his stories. I gotta say the kid’s imagination was pretty damn fertile. Oh, he had friends, but they just weren’t into it like him. He was like the Lance Armstrong of action figures. And of science fiction. At first, when he began writing in the eighth grade, we didn’t mind. He still made time for us. And we knew that when he was holding us in his sweaty little hands and he got that far off look in his eye, he’d come back to burying us in the back yard or - god forbid! – blowing us up with firecrackers. But it was worth it for a part in one of those stories. We loved him for it. He kept us around even when we were minus a leg or two - or even a head. In that mind of his, he found a use for all of us. Then he discovered girls. October, 1986. It was like the end of the world. One day we’re standing in the middle of this building block creation he’d pretended was some marble city on a planet near Alpha Centauri and the next we were stuck in a box in the closet. Not even a “See ya later!” Nope, it was into the closet, then we heard some high-pitched girly-giggles then silence. We didn’t see him for years. We got word about him once in a while. Heard he took up writing, but it was crap like “The Breakfast Club” only with better music. We couldn’t believe it. Not Charlie. What happened to those aliens with heads he’d sculpted out of wax? Spaceships? Those complex plots? All gone. For what? You guessed it: Girls. Emotions. “Serious fiction.” I tell you, it was like hearing Elvis had left the building. During our two decade exile in the closet, we heard other things about him. He went to college. He wrote a lot, but not much he really liked. We knew it even then. It was like he didn’t dare write science fiction. Some of us had lost hope and just lay there. Others kept vigil, hoping for a day we didn’t dare speak about. Then we heard he’d stopped writing in 1996. Did he come to reclaim us? No. He took up music for ten years or so. He took up yoga. Once in a while, he’d visit us in the closet. But it was half-hearted. His mind was elsewhere. Then one day, he really did come back for us. One second we’re in the dark and the next thing we know we’re in a car headed for Massachusetts. Suddenly we got a whole shelf to ourselves out in broad daylight! Then he bought a bunch of others form some planet called Ebay. He’d just sit and stare at us with that old look. But why were we suddenly back in the picture? He had a wife now, who didn’t mind that he played with us. So what had happened? Turns out he’d never forgotten about those stories. He’d been thinking about all of us and the stories he’d made up and then remembered he’d been a writer once. From the shelf we could see him typing away. Before long he’s got a whole novel together! Then he’s working on another one. Word is there are two more in the planning stages! Some short stories, too! It’s good to see him using his imagination again. Its good to know he never abandoned us. He returned to his true love of science fiction. We hear the stories are pretty good. Someday we’ll get one of the cats to score us a copy of the manuscript. Man, it’s good to be out of the damn closet! --- I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me
    Chang, for rizzle.

    I’m eating Girl Scout Cookies.

    The cat is eating crunchy food.

    I just woke up from a nap.

    I may finally get back to working on my novel.

    Life in Maine rocks!

  3. changterhune – Before you hear lies from Chang Terhune himself, we thought we’d tell you the truth: without us, his old action figures, he’d be nowhere. He loved science fiction from way back and began reading it at an early age, but it was through us that he acted it all out. That’s what led to the writing. He watched a lot of science fiction shows like Star Trek, U.F.O, and movies, too. But we were always there to do his bidding. And it’s like they say: you always forget about the little people on your way up. Oh, the 70’s and early 80’s with him were good times! He’d use these blocks and make all the crazy buildings for us to be in his stories. I gotta say the kid’s imagination was pretty damn fertile. Oh, he had friends, but they just weren’t into it like him. He was like the Lance Armstrong of action figures. And of science fiction. At first, when he began writing in the eighth grade, we didn’t mind. He still made time for us. And we knew that when he was holding us in his sweaty little hands and he got that far off look in his eye, he’d come back to burying us in the back yard or - god forbid! – blowing us up with firecrackers. But it was worth it for a part in one of those stories. We loved him for it. He kept us around even when we were minus a leg or two - or even a head. In that mind of his, he found a use for all of us. Then he discovered girls. October, 1986. It was like the end of the world. One day we’re standing in the middle of this building block creation he’d pretended was some marble city on a planet near Alpha Centauri and the next we were stuck in a box in the closet. Not even a “See ya later!” Nope, it was into the closet, then we heard some high-pitched girly-giggles then silence. We didn’t see him for years. We got word about him once in a while. Heard he took up writing, but it was crap like “The Breakfast Club” only with better music. We couldn’t believe it. Not Charlie. What happened to those aliens with heads he’d sculpted out of wax? Spaceships? Those complex plots? All gone. For what? You guessed it: Girls. Emotions. “Serious fiction.” I tell you, it was like hearing Elvis had left the building. During our two decade exile in the closet, we heard other things about him. He went to college. He wrote a lot, but not much he really liked. We knew it even then. It was like he didn’t dare write science fiction. Some of us had lost hope and just lay there. Others kept vigil, hoping for a day we didn’t dare speak about. Then we heard he’d stopped writing in 1996. Did he come to reclaim us? No. He took up music for ten years or so. He took up yoga. Once in a while, he’d visit us in the closet. But it was half-hearted. His mind was elsewhere. Then one day, he really did come back for us. One second we’re in the dark and the next thing we know we’re in a car headed for Massachusetts. Suddenly we got a whole shelf to ourselves out in broad daylight! Then he bought a bunch of others form some planet called Ebay. He’d just sit and stare at us with that old look. But why were we suddenly back in the picture? He had a wife now, who didn’t mind that he played with us. So what had happened? Turns out he’d never forgotten about those stories. He’d been thinking about all of us and the stories he’d made up and then remembered he’d been a writer once. From the shelf we could see him typing away. Before long he’s got a whole novel together! Then he’s working on another one. Word is there are two more in the planning stages! Some short stories, too! It’s good to see him using his imagination again. Its good to know he never abandoned us. He returned to his true love of science fiction. We hear the stories are pretty good. Someday we’ll get one of the cats to score us a copy of the manuscript. Man, it’s good to be out of the damn closet! --- I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me
    Chang, for rizzle.

    I’m eating Girl Scout Cookies.

    The cat is eating crunchy food.

    I just woke up from a nap.

    I may finally get back to working on my novel.

    Life in Maine rocks!

  4. On hitting their watch list. My name is on it, If I don’t use my middle name I get stopped every single time. Too common a name. On Bush. I didn’t care for or trust President Bush before he got elected and like his act much less now. I do have to say the latest on the talk shows is off the hook, bashing wise. He was getting cooked to well done for showing up at the site of the murders in Virgina, so much sooner than he did for the Katrina disaster! “Sorry, you came to quick!” I don’t care for him at all, but I don’t go our of my way to make every single thing he does wrong or evil.
    James A. Harris

  5. amandageddon – She is a slacker of the highest order, a geek of not so much, went back to school to become an even bigger geek and possibly get paid for it. She loves it when a plan comes together.
    Amanda

    I cut my hair off.

    I’m looking into SEO and Google’s AdWords for work, and trying to figure out how to not blatantly lie when doing up a CV to give to a guy my Dad knows that might be able to find me a web geek job that I’m LONG out of practice to do.

  6. Hmm, vetting crowds is nothing new. It’s been going on for longer than GWB has been in office. Can’t say I like our leaders on either side of the aisle behaving in such a way.

  7. I’m upgrading my laptop to XP Professional because our new office network doesn’t play nice with XP Home. I’m also mourning my office couch, which won’t be coming with us. However, since the new office will be twenty miles closer to home and not in the little slice of hell we call Santa Clarita, I can cope.

  8. The dog just puked on my home office carpet.

    Speaking of puking, a former Seattle cop’s blood alcohol level set a new state record at 0.47%, and she’s been charged with DUI.

    And in other DUI news, the Seattle Sonics are leaving Seattle for Oklahoma, home of their new owners. It’s been a long time since I followed pro basketball – the players have become freakish, overtall thugs noted more for their tattoos, bling and transgressions than their athleticism.

    Speaking of bling, SF author John Scalzi is coming to the PacNW next week. I hope the oversized diamond and platinum jewelry he packs won’t be a problem in his carry-on.

    Otherwise, all is pretty quiet on the Kitsap peninsula.

  9. I’m contemplating how I’m going to finish some office work this evening, watch “My Name is Earl” and “The Office,” and avoid getting sucked into the beautiful copy of Tolkien’s “The Children of Hurin” and reading until 2 am.

    I’m also planning for Penguincon this weekend, where I’m looking forward to meeting John Scalzi.

  10. No comment on the POTUS, he’s my CINC and there are rules about that sort of thing.

    As to my day, I’m turning spruce bowls in the woodshop and decorating them with hand-carved salmon. They’re beeeuutiful, if I do say so myself, said I. I may take a few hours this afternoon, before the hellion Jr. gets home from school to work on my book. Oh, and it’s sixty and sunny here in Palmer, Alaska today – so I’ve got the shop door open. Me and the dogs are having a great day! The cats are hibernating in the sunroom, collecting solar energy so they can raise hell all night, bastards. Thanks for asking.

  11. Jim, this would be WAY too scary-coincidental if it were true… but is or was one of your dogs a tibetan spaniel? If so, I have “met” you before on a dog focused forum.

  12. I’m thinking about following Resident Bush’s lead and baking a turd soufflé for dinner than force feeding it to children and brainwashed adults.

    Nah, too much work, I’ll order pizza and work on my book instead.

  13. As Molly Ivins used to say, “our ownliest president” is going to be giving a talk at East Grand Rapids H.S. tomorrow, Friday 20 April 2007. He should have a fine conservative reception from that community in West Michigan. And hopefully, his comings and goings won’t interfere with either end of my commuting by virtue of timing and geography. Not saying this to be meanspirited, just that I have enough hours commuting to a part-time teaching job that I don’t live for having delays due to special movements.

    Back in the days when Presidents road the rails, POTUS specials required crews to go out and spike all the switches along the route and post guards to prevent anyone from tampering with the track. I think Nixon took a Metroliner to New York once and the POTUS rules nearly brought the Northeast Corridor to its knees. There’s been very little President on rails traffic since then — end of an era.

    Dr. Phil

  14. My fiance and I are babysitting his mom’s friend’s daughter tonight. Tomorrow we’re going to a benefit concert (UM Life Sciences Orchestra, for the local children’s hospital) in Ann Arbor. Notably, we’re not going to Penguicon, even though we preregistered at ConFusion, because the hotel was full and then the more-expensive nearby hotel was full and we have a wedding to attend Saturday afternoon. Not that we’re bitter.

  15. Jeri, nope. Sorry but happy to have avoided a scary coincidence. Wheh! (wipes brow). I raise Alaskan sled dogs, shepherd husky mutt mixes. Working mail run dogs, not racers. I fact, Jumper, my lead dog is helping me type this, mostly by keeping my lap warm with her head and making the “give us a treat” noises…

  16. So, you know about the NYC Condoms, right? NYC has an official condom(http://72.32.200.206/flash/) Anyway, organizations can order them in bulk to be distributed at events and such. So I, in my genius, decided that – since I’m currently producing a musical called Emergency Contraception!: The Musical – a great marketing idea would be to distribute these condoms with info about our show on labels on the back – with a tagline along the lines of: Our show should be the only EC you need. Wear a condom. Or something…that’s still being worked out.

    The point is, I was on the phone – at my office, mind you – placing the order, and it amused me muchly that I was at my place of employment saying things like The minimum is 3 cases? How many condoms come in a case? 1,000? OK, so I need three cases of condoms. No…no I didn’t need any cases of lube, just condoms. Yes, three cases.

    So, yeah. That’s what’s happening with me today. :)

  17. ‘Scuse me. Watch list? What watch list? There’s a story there, but he’s not telling it…

    Try being the kid of the guy who’s the head nerd of the biggest independent crime lab in the world, and then having the chief of police in your city recognize you when he’s giving a speech in the auditorium sophomore year. That’s interesting. Or the time we handed out condoms at the Gay Pride Parade, to support my father’s ‘revolutionary’ new test. ‘What’s In Your Genes?’ in a matchbox-type thing with a picture of a jean pocket. I was dared to hand them out in school.

  18. I get to go home soon. I’d be excited but for the tired.

  19. I get to go home soon. I’d be excited but for the tired.

  20. 2 Live Crew recently played a local bar. (I know — they’re still around?)

    No, I didn’t really make any attempt to go.

  21. Let’s see…listening to my one dog cough (he has a “growth” in his heart, which makes the heart bigger and pushes against the lungs). Listening to the other dog snore. Getting ready to watch an episode or two of “Planetes” followed by more of the Criterion edition of the original “Solaris”. Then either “Diamond Dogs” by Alastair Reynolds or “Ghost Brigades” by some hack, followed by eyelid maintenance.

    This after a shift at the part-time job where I was given another Major Task that must fit into the limits of the job (no OT, now, and nothing over the hourly cap!) while not scrimping on the other stuff. Que sera, sera. Or something along those lines.

    This weekend, unless it rains (again), I expect to be mowing the grass. Don’t think it ever got this high this early in the year.

  22. Use to live in Tipp. Graduated from the local high school. Left as soon as possible and have NOT been back.I can see why fearless leader would set up camp there. Not exactly a hotbed of liberalism…Used to be totally snow white town, not a black or brown face to be seen.

  23. Pretty exciting, here, trying to keep from getting caught reading blogs at work.

    Which politicians don’t perform for heavily vetted crowds, aside from the ones who can’t draw a crowd?

  24. It’s snowing. Supposed to snow for at least another day, and on Tuesday it’s supposed to be plus 17. Celsius.

  25. Scalzi, I am constantly amused by your posts regarding your neck-of-the-woods Ohio — my girlfriend grew up in Troy.

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