Mmmmm… Bacon

This arrived in the mail today:

Which caused me some confusion because, well, I didn’t order it. Turns out it’s a gift from Whatever reader Tania, who writes: “This is the year of the pig, you are a noted bacon aficionado, and Epicurious gives the cookbook a good review, so why not send the book? Enjoy!”

Oh, I will, Tania. You needn’t worry about that. For the rest of you who are curious about the book, here’s the Amazon page for it. It even comes with dessert recipes, which you might think go a little beyond the pale. But I can admit that, yes, I once tried to make a dessert out of bacon: I created a maple and brown sugar bacon pie. It did not turn out well. But hope springs eternal.

In any event, thank you, Tania. This book will be loved in Scalzi household, you can be assured.

If anyone else wants to send me anything, this would be appreciated. And this. And this. I thank you in advance.

43 Comments on “Mmmmm… Bacon”

  1. Hmmmmm. Chrissy, the black and white pony mare, is listed at only $100. Maybe you’ll actually get one of your wishes. :)

  2. Okay, who had less than a week until we had a bacon post? And there’s a Coke Zero in the post. All we need is the beautiful Chang (who tain’t Chang) lust photo and the trifecta would be complete.

  3. I think having a legion of admiring fans may be going to your head, John. Wish I had someone I could ask to buy me a Mustang!

  4. To be sure, CJ, my expectations of someone buying me a Mustang (or indeed, even an iPod Touch) are realistically low. The links are there solely for comedy purposes.

    Which isn’t to say I’d turn either down.

    I would probably pass on the pony, however. Don’t tell Athena.

  5. I was just looking at the 16GB iPod Touch before coming here — that does look awesome, but $400 is a bit steep. Plus I already have five iPod somethings floating around (two Nanos, two Shuffles and an old iPod Classic).

  6. This reminds me that I think it would be a very good idea for diners to offer a plate of bacon as an appetizer while you wait for your ‘two egg an y way and meat’.

    How is it possible no one has bacon appetizers?

  7. I hear (only by rumor, I mean, I don’t really know) that some of the modeling sites on the net come with the ability of the guys who log on “just for the articles” to buy pretty clothes for the girls who will then wear them for future photo sets.

    Maybe you should promise that, for instance, you would post a picture of you watching “Heroes” on your new iPod from Steve, giving credit of course to the donor. Or a picture of you flying down an Ohio highway in your gifted Mustang with your combover flying in the wind, with “Thanks Jim Wright” superimposed.

    Just a thought.

    Old Jarhead

  8. Old Jarhead:

    I don’t think I really need to enumerate the many differences between a hot young woman and me. Sadly, these many differences are just the things that precipitate such wanton gifting. Also, alas, knowing my BMI at the moment, I don’t think anyone wants me modeling clothes in any event.

  9. Hell, I ‘m just glad you don’t find it creepy!
    I was in an odd mood and decided you needed the book. Like I said – Enjoy!

  10. I have a friend who put together a quite tasty bacon (well, okay, it was turkey bacon, but still..) ice cream this summer. I could always try to get the recipe for you …

  11. For bacon as dessert, when carving a suckling pig, there is an area, which is divine as a decadant treat.

    Behind the ribs, at the bottom of the roast, about where the waist would be on a person. About 1″ wide, and 3″ long. Delicious.

    Athena would be disappointed in a pony. They are over-rated; and have a nasty trot. A small horse, now that’s the ticket. Icelandics are as small as ponies, but they don’t have the problems. Heck, they even have a lateral gait.

  12. Chang, in that same shopping frenzy I picked up your MP3 album from Amazon’s MP3 store. I’m going to listen to it this afternoon while I’m putting my office back together (work moved me to a new building).

  13. Whoa, whoa, whoa. That ain’t me with the pony offer. That’s some other Steve. What, you want my wife to find out I gave a pony to someone else? She’d kill me.

  14. Ohhhhhhh, I feel my arteries hardening just looking at the cover.

    You know, my Wife used to be able to eat a pound of bacon in one sitting.

    This would be an awesome Christmas present.

    Mmmmmmm, bacon (insert sound of Homer drooling here)

  15. Steve Buchheit Says: Whoa, whoa, whoa. That ain’t me with the pony offer. That’s some other Steve.

    Just to be clear: I’m not Some Other Steve.

  16. John,
    If you’re going to ask your readers for expensive cars, I’d like to suggest the Tesla Roadster.
    (Please note, I have no affiliation with the above, I just think it’s an awesome car, and the geek in me loves that it’s all electric.)

  17. If you really want a good bacon dessert, I can’t recommend Bacon Brittle aka Bacon Toffee ( enough. I’ve made it once and almost went into a bacon pleasure coma. If you have problems with addiction, you may not want to try this.

  18. I will try and bring some of my home-made bacon to Millennicon in March for you. No promises though. The stuff has a short shelf life if my family finds it.

  19. Of course, there will be times that one cannot work bacon itself into a dish. I can’t imagine what they might be, but I’m sure they exist. So, in that event, consider
    (No, that’s not a joke.)