You Can’t Fire Me

Probably because so many friends were recently let go at AOL, I had a dream in which I was being laid off at some sort of organization that was a mash-up of AOL and the Fresno Bee (those two being the real jobs I had, back in the day). The funny thing is that in my dream, I am what I am now, which is a freelance dude who works on contract from time to time. So when the guy came in to tell me I’d been laid off, I just looked at him like he was nuts. Which was a nice feeling, even if it was just in a dream.

Left unanswered was what I was doing in an office, where I had apparently worked for years on end, if, in fact, I was a freelancer, but that’s dreaming for you. Dreams don’t actually have to make sense all the way through, or even part way through.

Also, I’m not sure why I was a parrot. That’s probably best left unexplored.

By John Scalzi

I enjoy pie.

12 replies on “You Can’t Fire Me”

I had the same dream except you were a parrot Jan Michael Vincent. Who went on to star in the remake of Big John Little John.

[quote]Dreams don’t actually have to make sense all the way through, or even part way through[/quote]

Or, they can make sense, but only to you. I wish stories worked that way…

Wait a minute! You wrote a novel someone finds out they’re really a sheep [If you haven’t read it, it’s Trask, which is why he feels so guilty after eating a woman in a wool sweater], and you can’t figure out why you were a parrot?

It’s a Harry Creek novel waiting to happen!

Just don’t tell my wife. Because she’d be all, like, “that’s fine, but I get to watch.” Which would totally throw me off.

A woman after my own heart. And it throws off my husband too, even with his eyeliner and tight jeans!

I just find it surprising that the Fresno Bee once had a good writer outside of the Sports section. Though to be fair to the Bee, I have no idea if you were a good writer then.

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