By the Power Vested in Me By, Er, Me…
… I declare today “National Get Your Wife Flowers For No Reason Day.”
Why? Well, clearly, no reason. That’s right there on the label, people. Pay attention.
If you have not a wife, consider getting your spouse/significant other/longtime object of non-stalkerish affections flowers.
And yes, I participated. Can’t declare it without doing it, now, can I.