How Athena is Spending Her Last Day of Christmas Break
Posted on January 2, 2008 Posted by John Scalzi 37 Comments
Yes, it comes as a surprise to her as well.
And no, I wasn’t really waiting around with a camera for the moment when my precious offspring barfed the content of her adorable widdle tummy into a bowl. This is one of those dramatic enactments you hear so much about on TV. However, she is indeed not feeling particularly great at the moment. Whether this is just a part of a deep game, setting the scene to avoid school when it resumes tomorrow, is something we’ll have to find out. Although with the current temperature at about 8 degrees, and nasty wind and snowdrifts, I expect it’s 50/50 that school will be canceled tomorrow anyway. All this possible dramatic posturing for nothing.
Ahh, the reflective shiny bowl. So that you can see the spewage in real time. The Scalzis are awesome.
Poor Athena. There’s nothing worse than the spews, no matter what age you are.
Feel better, Athena.
I’m pretty sure there was a lot of that going on yesterday morning. Except, I think it was more adults hurling into shiny bowls than nine-year-olds.
Tell her she’s a day late.
Ech. Never fun. I hope she feels better soon. But starting school back up on a Thursday seems stupid to me anyway.
At first I thought she was slurping up leftover eggnog. Sorry to here that she’s making her own.
Oh Kelsey, you just ruined eggnog for me.
Although I must say, that the best part with the shiny bowl is trying to get the image out of your head when you suddenly realize your salad now sits in the same, now dishwasher washed, bowl a few days later at the dinner table.
Fun times growing up, let me tell ya.
Feel better, Athena!
She’s going to love the fact that you posted this online….
She was more upset that I used the phrase “adorable widdle tummy” than that I posted the picture. I mean, she posed for it, you know. She knew where it was going.
After helping my wife through a bout of food poisoning last week, I’ve learned something that might mean that I’m ready for parenting:
The sound of someone throwing up can wake me from a deep sleep.
Feel better, Athena!
Everybody knows you’re supposed to throw-up in a bucket. Shiny bowl? That’s just wrong.
It’s a space-age throw-up bowl mentioned in Old Man’s War, Nathan! It’s just like the astronauts use after they drink Tang. Live in the now, man.
John, you shouldn’t let her watch news stories about Huckabee. Inevitable outcome (so to speak), really.
You’re saving these images up for when she starts dating, aren’t you?
No. For when she’s dating, I’m saving up videos of me with a sniper rifle, shooting the heads off mannequins from 1000 yards.
My then-fiance got a ton of outraged people whining at hime for posting a picture of me throwing up some of that Jones Soda holiday flavors until he pointed out that it was in fact a reinactment.
(We had decided to actually try each flavor. And document each sip with a photo. He didn’t have the camera ready when I went careening to the sink to throw up the broccoli flavor. (Christmas 2005)
It was always shiny bowls when I was a kid. Is that not the standard? Can we do some sort of poll on that?
Caption: Do Not Order the Racoon. It’s not as fresh as they claim.
John, my daughter thought I was a little weird when I framed one of her best pistol targets, a 100/9X string @ 50 feet from when she was 11. I just smiled–it’s for showing future boyfriends. It goes with her karate trophies. ;-)
(I prefer the M1A National Match .308. The Armalite is all swell and everything but it just doesn’t have that extreme range…)
That. Is. So. Wrong.
But if she’s okay with it, I guess it’s fair game.
I’m stuck home with the kid on yet another snow day.
Dear Great State Of Maine:
WHAT THE FRIG??!?!?!?! Why do you react to 6-12 inches of snow like we’re frigging North Carolina?!?! It’s been snowing here this time of year for the last 20,000 years. I think we can prepare better so I don’t have to sit through another day of Charlie and Lola when I’d rather be doing yoga or playing Resistance: Fall of Man. C’mon, peoples! Dammit!
Ahhh, the joys of parenthood: SKB: Spontaneous Kid Barfing.
Distance to toilet (in seconds): 3
Average warning time preceding SKB: 1 second, i.e., approximately just long enough time to say “I think I”m going to . . . ” or “I don’t feel good”.
So I had my five year old go down early since her aunt and uncle get up at the crack of dawn to walk their aging dog.
Aunt: Merry Christmas Sarah!
Sarah: Opens mouth, spews on hardwood floor (luckily)
Sound of uncle running to bedroom, screaming on the way “Your daughter’s sick!” Slam of bedroom door.
Luckily presents took care of most of the pain.
Kate Baker, sorry for ruining eggnog for you. But honestly, who, other than an Orc, drinks something that ends in nog?
I have to agree with some of the others Jon, that bowl doesn’t seem to be the best for spewing. I’d be a little concerned about the “splash factor.” It’s like…
…Wayne’s World: If you are going to spew, spew in this (a little plastic cup).
…when you’re about to blow chunks in the hospital and a nurse hands you one of those kidney shaped bed pans and you give her that ya-gotta-be-kidding-me-I-hope-you-get-splashed-when-I-projectile-vomit -into-this-here-soap-dish look.
Sheesh, school starts again the Thursday after New Year? That’s pretty harsh on the kids – how long do they get off total? It’s normally a good 2 or 3 weeks at least here in the UK. Guess from a parent’s point of view it does make life easier though…
Why when I was a kid we were back in school on the 2nd. That’s what’s wrong with these kids today…(Un)fortunately the local schools don’t go back until next Wednesday.
Might I suggest a smallish trash can, that’s what I always used. Large volume, low splash back. I hope she feels better soon.
Oh, did Athena have too much champagne for New Year’s Eve? And does she have a hangover as well?
Practical observation: A small plastic trash can with a liner is good to keep at hand, and sticking a wad of paper towels in the bottom makes the disposal-to-outdoor-trash much easier by lowering the slosh factor. Also makes cleaning the trash can later a lot less odious.
Allow me to demonstrate.
I also remember my parents giving me a big, shiny bowl to barf in while I was sick. Unless you’re a giant what else in the kitchen is big enough for the task?
Jim: My daughter only got the 24th-1st off. SHe went all day on the 21st, and was back in school this morning at 8am.
Mine got off beginning the 21st and go back tomorrow.
My daughter is back at school today. I, however, am off until the end of the month. Woohoo!
Vincent: “…what else in the kitchen is big enough for the task?”
Well, a colande… no, wait…
The bowl is just for the recreation. I have always felt the small trashcan was the best bet, short of being quick enough to make it to the bathroom.
As far as long range marksmanship and boy friends goes I have always thought that a shotgun was a better deterent. I mean they going to be at your front door. How much marksmanship is involved at less than ten feet?
Have any of you heard Hey Mister by Custom?
Hope you’re feeling better.
I definitely belong to the small trashcan group. Which is why you should never throw anything that can’t go down the toilet in your bedroom trash can.
They could just be brain-dead dumb, but I don’t worry at all about my ability to intimidate teenage boys in person. The long-range stuff is to ensure that they never ever really feel safe just because they can’t see me. I could still be watching. Through a scope.
Oh, lordy. I spent Christmas night in a similar fashion, though as I am an adult I actually got to spend eight hours, more or less, crouching on the very cold bathroom floor just wanting to get it over with so I could go to bed.
I don’t think I ever got handed a bowl. When we were growing up, we had a big old van and the carsick-prone person got tole to “aim for the door well.”
Every time we get a posed photo, I’m most amused by imagining the little 30-second dialogue that led up to the photo.
“Hey, you’re sick, huh? Wanna be blog fodder again?”
Feel better, Athena.
I hope you’re feeling better by now. Though I must confess, I have met six year olds that were bigger than you. (You ever noticed how much smaller kids are when they have nothing on?) The next time dad disinters his last meal make sure you get pictures of the event. Turn about is fair play after all. :)