Temp Cat Gets In Your Face

And informs you I’m very busy today.

34 Comments on “Temp Cat<img src="https://s.w.org/images/core/emoji/13.1.0/72x72/2122.png" alt="™" class="wp-smiley" style="height: 1em; max-height: 1em;" /> Gets In Your Face”

  1. “Hah!” sez Temp Cat, “I laugh at the tuft of Rogaine foam on your hed!”

    What you need is a chimp to give the Temp a good scrubbing in the sink. Comedy gold.

  2. changterhune – Before you hear lies from Chang Terhune himself, we thought we’d tell you the truth: without us, his old action figures, he’d be nowhere. He loved science fiction from way back and began reading it at an early age, but it was through us that he acted it all out. That’s what led to the writing. He watched a lot of science fiction shows like Star Trek, U.F.O, and movies, too. But we were always there to do his bidding. And it’s like they say: you always forget about the little people on your way up. Oh, the 70’s and early 80’s with him were good times! He’d use these blocks and make all the crazy buildings for us to be in his stories. I gotta say the kid’s imagination was pretty damn fertile. Oh, he had friends, but they just weren’t into it like him. He was like the Lance Armstrong of action figures. And of science fiction. At first, when he began writing in the eighth grade, we didn’t mind. He still made time for us. And we knew that when he was holding us in his sweaty little hands and he got that far off look in his eye, he’d come back to burying us in the back yard or - god forbid! – blowing us up with firecrackers. But it was worth it for a part in one of those stories. We loved him for it. He kept us around even when we were minus a leg or two - or even a head. In that mind of his, he found a use for all of us. Then he discovered girls. October, 1986. It was like the end of the world. One day we’re standing in the middle of this building block creation he’d pretended was some marble city on a planet near Alpha Centauri and the next we were stuck in a box in the closet. Not even a “See ya later!” Nope, it was into the closet, then we heard some high-pitched girly-giggles then silence. We didn’t see him for years. We got word about him once in a while. Heard he took up writing, but it was crap like “The Breakfast Club” only with better music. We couldn’t believe it. Not Charlie. What happened to those aliens with heads he’d sculpted out of wax? Spaceships? Those complex plots? All gone. For what? You guessed it: Girls. Emotions. “Serious fiction.” I tell you, it was like hearing Elvis had left the building. During our two decade exile in the closet, we heard other things about him. He went to college. He wrote a lot, but not much he really liked. We knew it even then. It was like he didn’t dare write science fiction. Some of us had lost hope and just lay there. Others kept vigil, hoping for a day we didn’t dare speak about. Then we heard he’d stopped writing in 1996. Did he come to reclaim us? No. He took up music for ten years or so. He took up yoga. Once in a while, he’d visit us in the closet. But it was half-hearted. His mind was elsewhere. Then one day, he really did come back for us. One second we’re in the dark and the next thing we know we’re in a car headed for Massachusetts. Suddenly we got a whole shelf to ourselves out in broad daylight! Then he bought a bunch of others form some planet called Ebay. He’d just sit and stare at us with that old look. But why were we suddenly back in the picture? He had a wife now, who didn’t mind that he played with us. So what had happened? Turns out he’d never forgotten about those stories. He’d been thinking about all of us and the stories he’d made up and then remembered he’d been a writer once. From the shelf we could see him typing away. Before long he’s got a whole novel together! Then he’s working on another one. Word is there are two more in the planning stages! Some short stories, too! It’s good to see him using his imagination again. Its good to know he never abandoned us. He returned to his true love of science fiction. We hear the stories are pretty good. Someday we’ll get one of the cats to score us a copy of the manuscript. Man, it’s good to be out of the damn closet! --- I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me
    Chang, thank you very much

    TEMP CAT HAS PWNED YOUR HOUSE!!! DANG!!!

    You know, I think just opening PhotoShop counts as PhotoShoppery, there JS.

    Steve, I wish I’d bet on Jan. 11th. It’d pay for my new flatscreen!

  3. John, it’s a use of photoshop to manipulate the image other than resampling or resizing, so, while it may not be the full-blown deadline-avoidance tactics we’ve seen in the past (and have come to love and enjoy), I believe it still shows intent to commit photoshoppery.

  4. Don’t you have a deadline?

    (I think it’s pretty clear that whoever gets to name this cat, he’s already yours. Or you’re already his.

  5. Judging from the number of photos of TempCat on this site since you “got” him, I’m thinking Cassie’s right. He’s taken with you and you with him. Fortunately, he’s very photogenic. Not in a Glughaglee (which is how her name sounds in my head) supermodel kinda way, more like Harrison Ford.

  6. Dear god… if you only knew just how much Temp Cat looks like my cat Johm-B… (only of course, Johm-B is dead and buried these last 6 years). But MAN the markings, coloration, expression et alii are EXACT! Downright scary I tell ya…

  7. Just using the cutout filter doesn’t really count as Photoshoppery, does it?

    Um, yes it does. Just because a particular operation is very quick and easy doesn’t mean it’s not Photoshoppery. It may not be Weird-Ass Photoshoppery, but it’s Photoshoppery, nonetheless.

  8. Oh hell. He’s in there watching you go potty, isn’t he? It’s all over–you are definitely owned.

    How are the other cats taking this addition?

  9. O Great Scalzi, it is wonderful to see that you are as smitten with TempCat George as you are with Magnificent She. (Not that it is possible not to be smitten with Her Radiance, unless you are pretty much of no consequence to the universe.)

    The Executive Committee of The Official Ghlaghghee Fan Club expects that She is currently testing TempCat George and that he will come through with flying colors. Then She may work Her magic upon him as She has done for so many others.

    The Official Ghlaghghee Fan Club

  10. TempCat has apparently chosen you as its’ human, I hope Krissy takes that into consideration when she names him! He is so adorable!!!

    be well…

  11. What happens in the bathroom, stays in the bathroom!

    Jeez, I hope it doesn’t stay there for long. Indoor plumbing ranks above sliced bread.

  12. ROTFLMAO. You are so PWND.

    Glad Temp Cat is loved.

    And what IS it with cats in sinks? My Siegfried thinks the downstairs bathroom sink is the best nap spot in the world even though he almost overflows it now. (it’s a single, counterless wall mounted piece of porcelain probably from the 40s, with the original faucet and handles. And eventually to be replaced.)

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