Temp Cat Requires a Name

Temp Cat passed two critical tests in the last 24 hours: The one at the vet that shows he’s free of feline leukemia, and the one here at the Scalzi Compound that shows he knows how to use a litter box and thus can be trusted to stay indoors overnight without pooping on the comforter. He’s now been given his shots (not happy about that) and made a member of the clan. Good for him.

What Temp Cat does not have yet, however, is a name. While Krissy has one or two in mind (including, actually, “Temp Cat”), we thought it might be fun to throw it open to you, the teeming Whatever masses, to see what suggestions you might have. In fact, we’ll make it an official contest, with a prize and everything. And so, I am proud to present:

The Official Name Temp Cat Contest!

The rules are simple:

1. The name can’t be obscene (because, dude, we have to call him this name every day, in front of other people).

2. Pick no more than five names and put them all in the same comment. This is to make it easier on us, and to make sure one person doesn’t just reel off a whole bunch of names. Man, that’s not cool.

3. Sometime next week, Krissy will look through the comment thread and see if she likes any of the names more than the names she’s already thinking about. If she does, you win. If she doesn’t, then, well, you’re all out of luck. Sorry.

Easy enough.

What does the winner win? Dunno. How about a book? I have some lying around. We can decide which one when/if you win. I’ll even sign it.

To help you in your naming quest, some data about Temp Cat: He’s a he, he’s about six months old, about 6 pounds, pushy in a cute way, aggressive without being obnoxious, fairly vocal and pretty active and playful. Black and white, obviously. Eats a lot. Purrs constantly. Is a small carnivore. You know.

All right, get to namin’!

392 Comments on “Temp Cat<img src="https://s.w.org/images/core/emoji/13.0.1/72x72/2122.png" alt="™" class="wp-smiley" style="height: 1em; max-height: 1em;" /> Requires a Name”

  1. My wife and I talked it over, and our joint recommendation as folks who have lived with cats for 30 years is. . . Temp Cat (TM). The best cat names are expressions of your state of mind and the cat’s personality at the time you meet. I don’t envy your task of picking a new name. It will be difficult to come up with something that equals the charm and wit of Temp Cat (TM).

  2. 1. Katze
    2. Kater
    3. Niner
    4. Whip

    1. is the German word for cat
    2. istthe German word for a male cat
    3. has a double meaning, a cat’s nine lives and cat-o’-nine-tails
    4. is funny

  3. Ricardo Restituyo – Misunderstood, slightly megalomaniac, good sense of humor, good-natured, easy-going, unhealthy attraction to complexity... Mostly Harmless.

    1. Finch
    2. Cat #3
    3. Temp Cat (TM)
    4. Aiden
    5. Root

    Temp Cat (TM) sounds like a very good name, IMHO.

  4. I’m rather attached to Temp Cat(tm), but if you feel the urge to change, how about “Gort”? He’s in black and white, is menacing, has laser eyes, stares enigmatically, has great invasion skills, and is superior to humans in every way.

    I will accept “Klaatu” as a substitute.

  5. By all means retain ‘Temp Cat ™’, but consider also

    ‘Jellicoe’, ‘Byng’, or ‘Rozhestvenshy’ (because all cats should be named after admirals – it’s amazing how few people know this!)

  6. Jasper (“dalmatian jasper” is whiteish and black)
    Obsidian (“snowflake obsidian” is black and grey/white)

    Although I rather like Temp Cat as well. Some friends of my had a cat named VK (Visitor Kitty) for years.

  7. PermaCat? since he’s no longer a temp…

    Jellicle cat since we’re told that

    Jellicle cats are black and white
    Jellicle cats are rather small
    Jellicle cats are merry and bright
    And pleasant to hear when they catterwaul…


  8. Macro. Mac for short.

    Although I like the name TempCat, too, like most of the people above. Does the naming contest mean he’ll be staying?

  9. Yeah, I still like Temp Cat best. However…

    1.) Temp to Perm
    2.) Mandibles of Death
    3.) Furry Machiavellian Person (which is really the surname of all cats)
    4.) Winston Churchill (because, dude, look at that face! He IS Churchill)
    5.) Remaindered Cat

  10. Did he learn to make that face from Athena? I think I’ve seen that look of utter contempt before on Whatever from a human.

    Interloper (or just ‘loper)
    Korean Delicacy <–my cat just attacked my foot.

  11. He became famous when he entered your house…
    So how about:

    1. Hype
    2. Snapshot
    3. Cheeky
    4. Hunter
    5. Fame Cat…

  12. *sigh*

    Once again the Whatever readership disappoints, and the Executive Committee of The Official Ghlaghghee Fan Club must provide the definitive answer:

    Insignificant Reflection of Her Shimmering Radiance

    or George for short.

    The Executive Committee will clearly win this contest and rather than have yet another signed Scalzi book, would rather have as prize a week of nothing but posted pictures and videos of Magnificent She along with a selection of choice anecdotes.

    The Official Ghlaghghee Fan Club

  13. I’m kind of partial to human names for cats. And since your 2 other cats have quite unique names, this would be a change of pace…

    1. Bernard
    2. Bill
    3. Ed
    4. Harry (heh)
    5. Lenny G.

  14. My experience as a cat owner is that cats respond better to names that contain sounds akin to “sh” (as in shut) or “cz” (as in czar), and these are the kind of names I’m looking for when getting a new cat overlord ;)

    That being said, I agree with JLowe, in that a cat’s name should reflect your first impression of it. If you want to get rid of the “Temp Cat (TM)” name however, my suggestions would be


  15. I’ll second not-Chang’s suggestion of George, as in “Hug him and squeeze him and name him…”

    Also like TempCat, but have to ask if it meets the name criteria of being able to be hollered.


  16. And considering I already pretty much own all of John’s fiction library and a few nonfic titles, would it be possible to have Joe Hill sign a copy of Heart Shaped Box instead? Just askin’.

  17. Fafhrd (hey, you already have one crazy spelled name, why not another?)

    Frakir (you can always hurl him at your enemies in hopes of strangling them!)

    Chaka (when the walls fell)

    Precious (but you can only call him in Gollum-voice: yessss my Precious, yesssss!)

    I also like PermaCat.

    Or just C.A.T. (make your own acronyms).

  18. It won’t win me any of the Scalzi ink, but I gotta go with Temp Cat as well. The “” really seals the deal for me. It also give the future potential of threatening that the cat is earning his name if he doesn’t cut it out.

    Plus, the cats’ initials would then cumulatively be “GLT” which sounds creepishly close to a certain bacon sandwich. Bacon, of course, being the Scalzi “” so to speak. (See all this pathetic bantering I’m doing, trying to get bookish goodness without actually doing any work?)

  19. My mother knew a couple who’d only let their kids get a cat if they named it after the longest name in the Bible.

    I hear, however, they they were eventually allowed to shorten Maher-shalal-hash-baz down to just Maher.

  20. 1.) The Master (come on, he looks like a Master!)
    2.) Burroughs (has a little look of ol’ William there)
    3.) Hayduke (he does look like a Monkey Wrench Gang member, and you can always shorten it to Duke–y’know, subordinate to the Queen of all Fluffiness)
    4.) Spork (the obligatory Bacon reference, as well as to those feet and claws as dining implements)
    5.) Whatever. Because, after all, he does look like a classic teenager.

  21. If not “Temp cat” then i might suggest:

    Syntax (error)
    Android’s Fantasy
    Grok (you grok?)

  22. 1. Enkidu – Gilgamesh’s buddy – and it rolls off the tongue
    2. Magni – A son of Thor
    3. Scooba – say it: Scooba Scooba Scooba
    4. Smacko – another one that rolls off the tongue
    5. Zippy – I’ve just always liked Zippy

  23. Underpants

    (Hey, some people name their pet “socks”, so why not… plus it’s common knowledge that no one can say “underpants” without smiling)

  24. 1. Scooby Nano
    2. Max
    3. Mr. Fish
    4. Bob
    5. Sylvester

    (I’m not very creative with cat names, I prefer dogs. But for a free book I can’t just not try.)

  25. Jen – wife. mother. knitter. unschooler. band geek. fatass. card-carrying socialist. militant breastfeeder. profane. agnostic. ENFP
    Jen in CT

    How about Temp-to-PermCat?
    Failing that, I’m partial to Larry.

  26. Another vote for Temp Cat. But, since I’m here…

    1. Robert Paulson (though I vaguely recall that one may have been suggested by someone already)
    2. Relatively symmetrical cat
    3. Snarky
    4. Snarky McSnark
    5. The Final Countdown

  27. I vote Oliver. As in Twist. After all, he’s a foundling taken in to a good home. (I’m speaking of the end of the book, not at all implying that you are the Fagin of stray cats.)

    :) ekd

  28. 1) Bartleby (as in ‘the Scrivener’ – if a cat’s face says anything, it says “I would prefer not to”)

    2) Mort

    3) Lovecraft (or, for punnage, H.P. Lovecat)

    and on a similar theme, my favourite:

    4) Cathulhu

  29. I vote for Merlin.

    He just randomly appeared on your doorsteps.

  30. yeah,
    TempCat, because then you can call it Tempe and Tempers in different situations. And those are cute.

  31. Widget (also a common placeholder word)



    Nermal (for when the other cats try to mail him to ABu Dhabi)

  32. car4shane – Roseville California – 54 years old with type 2 diabetes and renal failure. I have dialysis four times a week. Due to arthritis, neither my wife or I can drive a stick. It's not that we don't know how, it's just very painful to do so.

    Plus Kat

  33. Well, I’ve long been a proponent of the fact that cats can have whatever cool name you want, because it’s not as if they’ll come when you call (my three are named “Threnody”, “Hypatia”, and “E Pur si Muove”), so …

    1. Anson (as a nod to Unca Bob)
    2. and 3. Positron, or Quark–when you consider the qualities of these particles, and the qualities of cats, these two make sense.
    4. Mal (which can be a Serenity thing, or it can stand for “Malicious” or “Malodorous” or “Malevolent” …)
    5. Tullamore (because he will Dew what he wants to Dew–though one hopes that will stop after he’s neutered)

  34. 1. John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt.
    2. Hugo Award for Best Fan Writer (or just Hugo for short).
    3. I’ll add yet another vote for Tempcat, which really does seem to work nicely.

  35. For ‘whatever’ it’s worth…

    Temp Cat has my vote simply through the process of it is the name we have all come to know and love him by… (an it’s kinda cool too, gotta story wid it)

    Other than that I offer the names of my cats, now gone from us these past many years… that they might live on.

    1. “The Genie Johm-B” alt “Johm-B”

    A cat we got as a bedgraggled stray also whom Temp Cat may be the reincarnation of… seriously)(I can send pix as proof)

    B. “Ming The Merciless” alt “Ming”

    I had three Ming’s over the years. The last, and greatest of them was, we were told, a Russian Super Blue (IE Russian Blue) but I think he was a Chartreux as he was huge… not fat, HUGE.

    Anyhoo… it would be an honor and a real pleasure to know one of those names lived on if one was chosen. I can no longer have cats due to cat hair induced fatal asthma… *sigh*

  36. First, TempCat is a great name. But if that is not to be made permanent, consider Xanadu, just because it’sa cool name. Or Klaatu, as others have suggested. My favorite cat name of all time was Velcro, which was bestowed the 5th time in one day that said cat’s keeper was removing him from the couch one claw at a time. But I still think the best possible name for a Scalzi cat is Sir Francis.

  37. Schedar (pronounced Shaydar)- brightest star in Cassiopia


    Enheduanna: Sumerian moon priestess, first known author in history


    Mitth’raw’nuruodo (Thrawn for short) -possibly the most brilliant tactician in fiction

  38. 1.) Marvin
    2.) Elliott
    3.) DaVinci
    4.) Mike
    5.) Heinlein

    I know you may be partial to TempCat… but I was a temp for two years at my job and well, it just sucks not to be permanent.

  39. 1. Skizzle (I don’t know why)
    2. Agrinox (combination of “aggravated” and “obnoxious”
    3. PermaCat (suggested already, but that’s a great name)

  40. Ghaeydough (Fido)
    Gheelicks (Felix)
    Ghlasch (Flash)
    TempCat Tim

    How can you go wrong with TempCat(TM)? It’ll keep him in his place, and let him know who’s boss.

  41. changterhune – Before you hear lies from Chang Terhune himself, we thought we’d tell you the truth: without us, his old action figures, he’d be nowhere. He loved science fiction from way back and began reading it at an early age, but it was through us that he acted it all out. That’s what led to the writing. He watched a lot of science fiction shows like Star Trek, U.F.O, and movies, too. But we were always there to do his bidding. And it’s like they say: you always forget about the little people on your way up. Oh, the 70’s and early 80’s with him were good times! He’d use these blocks and make all the crazy buildings for us to be in his stories. I gotta say the kid’s imagination was pretty damn fertile. Oh, he had friends, but they just weren’t into it like him. He was like the Lance Armstrong of action figures. And of science fiction. At first, when he began writing in the eighth grade, we didn’t mind. He still made time for us. And we knew that when he was holding us in his sweaty little hands and he got that far off look in his eye, he’d come back to burying us in the back yard or - god forbid! – blowing us up with firecrackers. But it was worth it for a part in one of those stories. We loved him for it. He kept us around even when we were minus a leg or two - or even a head. In that mind of his, he found a use for all of us. Then he discovered girls. October, 1986. It was like the end of the world. One day we’re standing in the middle of this building block creation he’d pretended was some marble city on a planet near Alpha Centauri and the next we were stuck in a box in the closet. Not even a “See ya later!” Nope, it was into the closet, then we heard some high-pitched girly-giggles then silence. We didn’t see him for years. We got word about him once in a while. Heard he took up writing, but it was crap like “The Breakfast Club” only with better music. We couldn’t believe it. Not Charlie. What happened to those aliens with heads he’d sculpted out of wax? Spaceships? Those complex plots? All gone. For what? You guessed it: Girls. Emotions. “Serious fiction.” I tell you, it was like hearing Elvis had left the building. During our two decade exile in the closet, we heard other things about him. He went to college. He wrote a lot, but not much he really liked. We knew it even then. It was like he didn’t dare write science fiction. Some of us had lost hope and just lay there. Others kept vigil, hoping for a day we didn’t dare speak about. Then we heard he’d stopped writing in 1996. Did he come to reclaim us? No. He took up music for ten years or so. He took up yoga. Once in a while, he’d visit us in the closet. But it was half-hearted. His mind was elsewhere. Then one day, he really did come back for us. One second we’re in the dark and the next thing we know we’re in a car headed for Massachusetts. Suddenly we got a whole shelf to ourselves out in broad daylight! Then he bought a bunch of others form some planet called Ebay. He’d just sit and stare at us with that old look. But why were we suddenly back in the picture? He had a wife now, who didn’t mind that he played with us. So what had happened? Turns out he’d never forgotten about those stories. He’d been thinking about all of us and the stories he’d made up and then remembered he’d been a writer once. From the shelf we could see him typing away. Before long he’s got a whole novel together! Then he’s working on another one. Word is there are two more in the planning stages! Some short stories, too! It’s good to see him using his imagination again. Its good to know he never abandoned us. He returned to his true love of science fiction. We hear the stories are pretty good. Someday we’ll get one of the cats to score us a copy of the manuscript. Man, it’s good to be out of the damn closet! --- I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me
    Chang luv Murrkcurry

    1. Jonah
    2. Temp Cat
    3. Goldberg
    4. Sir Excellent! (must be said with exclamation!)
    5. Vin Diesel, Pony Expert

  42. Cat will come when you call, if you call them by their real names. Mine do. However, only the cat can tell you its real name.

    So good luck. I like TempCat just fine. What does the cat say about it?

  43. 1. Archibald
    2. Mu Meson
    3. Zorch
    4. Frank
    5. Borges

  44. 1. Cat 9 from outer space

    That is my only suggestion. What is good about this name? It has an obscure SF B movie reference in it. Also it implies that there are other cats . . .somewhere . . .3–8 yanno, which is a tad spooky, maybe even ominous. What is bad? Temp Cat might be better. :-P

  45. Figuring him out from the pictures accompanying various posts:

    All TempCat[tm] posts: he’s wearing a tuxedo, or is at least formally dressed.

    From “Yearns for the Bennies”: he’s of a literary bent, and enjoys a life of leisure.

    From “Gets in your Face”: very talkative, not at all shy about expressing himself.

    From “Cattitude”: Enjoys the finer things in life, is quite social.

    This post: can glare with the best of them, and has a giant head.

    The answer is obvious – Truman Capote.

    Failing that, depending how his relationship with Kodi develops, Colonel Henry Metzger (yeah, I love Thomas Perry’s older stuff).


  46. Hmmm, I’m not the best at naming cats (mine are Oliver and Dinah after Green Arrow and Black Canary) but I have a few suggestions:

    1. Russel Crowe
    2. Machiovelli
    3. Mr. McFuzzypants (he’s a teenager, he’s going to hate you anyway)
    4. ManEatingCow (he’s black and white)
    5. Stabby

  47. 1) Batcat (there’s something batmannish over him.)
    2) Dog or Doggie
    3) Felisaurus Rex
    4) Phenomenon…

    … bee dee bee dee dee.

  48. I confess I’ve haven’t read all of the above, so in case nobody’s said it already, how about Sylvester? Tried and true.

  49. Temp Cat certainly is charming, but doesn’t seem to reflect his impending status change. As noted above, PermaCat might be a better fit. Barring that, how about one of these:

    1. Jabberwock (artists’ renditions notwithstanding, Reverend Charles never described the Jabberwock beyond eyes of flame, claws, and jaws)
    2. Portmanteau (Another nod to Lewis Carroll)
    3. Marble
    4. ACME (A Cat that Mauls Everything)
    5. Transcendental Cat (Thanks to Diane Duane)

    When referring to the entire group, you may consider “The Powers That Be” :D

  50. Because I am appallingly unoriginal, I propose variants of a now-classic term which thankfully is not my own: Pixel-stained Technopeasant Wretch

    Which leads to the possibilities of
    Pixel-Stained Technopeasant Wretched Cat
    Pixel-Stained Technopeasant Wretch
    Pixel-Stained Technopeasant Cat (because cats should not generally be labeled as wretched)
    Pixel-Stained TechnoCat

    (And, obviously, all of these lead to “Pixel” for short, a Heinlein-approved, already-suggested name.)

    While I do like the name Pixel, your cat’s coloration leads me to think of Toner (but since you don’t use a printer, that name is somewhat out-of-place).

  51. Rat Jaws (this is a common can name in my extended family)
    Tempy McCaterson
    Chewbacca the Kitty

  52. PermCat, definitely.
    If only for the fact that name will ALWAYS prompt people to ask : “WTF?” and Athena’ll have a story to tell.

  53. — Crash (because of Crash’s line from Bull Durham: “I’m the player to be named later,” and also because it’s a fun cat name)
    — Max (no reason here)
    — Bickle (because he looks very “you talkin to me?” in that photo)
    — The Dude (because I end up calling cats “Dude” despite their having perfectly fine other names)

    I liked the “Bartleby” suggestion too, which we might use for a future cat, except we already decided the next cat will be named “Chicolini” (our current cat is Rufus T. Firefly).

  54. From the look on the Temp Cat ’s face, I’d say he should be named for a villain of some sort. My first choice would have been Ming The Merciless, but I want to win a free book and that’s already been taken (darn you JD Blackwell!). So my suggestions are:

    1. Adelei Niska
    2. Professor James Moriarty
    3. Count Orlok
    4. Arnold Zeck
    5. Macavity

  55. Tres…You know, french for “three”. SInce he is the third cat.

    You can pronounce it “Tray” or “Trace”.

    I am fond of TempCat though, and Schrodinger, since he went around uncertain as to whether he was staying or going…

    So he isn’t the neighbor’s kitty? yay for you…

  56. Temp Cat looks like a Spartan, ready to kick someone into a well

    Tyler Durden
    Julius Attila Hannibal Alexander Tamerlane Dio Khan
    Schrödinger’s Cat
    Von Neumann

  57. 1. Chien (pronounced SHE-en; French for “dog” [the symmetry for my friends who named their dog Chat, French for “cat”])

    2. Dave

    3. Kat

    4. Dawg

    5. Four legs, a tail, fur, and a purr? Ohmigod! I’m not a human!

  58. I think your non-lopsided cat needs some nominal company, so:


    (gh as in rough; o as in women; ti as in nation; br as in broken; ei as in Leicester; d as in Halesword, pronounced as if it ends in the singular definite article)

    Sorry, that’s the best I can do off the top of my balding head.

  59. I’m at work, sorry I can’t take time to read all the above, so please pardon any duplicates:

    Cha’tool (Hebrew for cat)
    Francis (as in Bacon– might as well get it out in the open….)

  60. Adam J. Whitlatch – Bonaparte, Iowa – Adam J. Whitlatch is the author of over sixty works of speculative short fiction and poetry, as well as the young adult science fiction novel E.R.A. - Earth Realm Army and the urban fantasy novella Retribution: Book I of the Blood Raven Saga. His work has appeared in Six Sentences, Northern Haunts: 100 Terrifying New England Tales, Dead Science, Shroud, Crossed Genres, The Drabbler, and Vicious Verses & Reanimated Rhymes just to name a few. Adam lives in southeastern Iowa with his wife and two sons. He is currently studying to become an English teacher.

    Sounds a lot like my cat Klunk. So yeah… how ’bout “Klunk”?

  61. My Black and white Tuxedo cat was called D.K., short for Devil Kitty. Although Temp Cat ™ is my first choice also, he short of looks a little like a Devil Kitty, and since I still miss my D.K. it would be nice to have a name sake. Yes, I AM going for the sympathy vote. I don’t have a signed Scalzi book and I want one!

  62. 1) Third
    2) Lothar or Lothair
    3) Indy (as in the dog from Indiana Jones)
    4) Spaghedeity or Spaghetti (as in The Flying Spaghetti Monster)
    5) Charles Milo McMorlee the IX

  63. Aloysius (pronounced al-oo-ISH-us. It is of Old German origin, and its meaning is “famous warrior”.)

  64. Temp Cat (TM) is pretty awesome, but I like books and have ideas, and so:

    Small Furry Deity. (He’s a cat, after all.)
    Geiger. (Variation on the Schrodinger theme.)
    Pel. (Brust reference.)

  65. The Brain

    “What do every night Pinky….”

  66. Very clever names you guys. But, I have to go with Temp Cat also. I know that won’t win me any prize, but, well, it’s his name.

    I’m glad you’re keeping him.

  67. You’ve got to have a name that’s fun to say:

    1. Mr Wiggles (Mr Wiggles and a bucket of glue, repeat)
    2. Fluffy aka fluffy the fluffster.. (say it just feels good)
    3. Reece (a pretty name)
    4. Raul ( he looks like a Raul)
    5. Stinker aka little stinker(all of our cats get called this at one time or another)..

  68. I’m gonna go with…

    Dee-oh-gee (Sure, I know he’s not a dog…but you might convince him otherwise)
    Seth (or Sethula, just cause it seems to fit ‘im.)

    I’m not averse to TempCat though – it’s a pretty cool name.

  69. My physicist uncle named a cat Muon. The muon is the longest lived unstable elementary particle after the neutron. Neutron may soon apply, but let’s not go there…

    He’s black and white, so perhaps Monochrome. But that word is ambiguous: sometimes meaning a single color (black OR white, not both), sometimes meaning bilevel, and sometimes meaning grayscale. Bitmap or Pixmap might work.

  70. TempCat(TM) is a great name, even if he’s been permanized into Castle Scalzi’s fiefdom. We generally have three cats at a time, and are almost 15 years into the current trio. We have threatened to name the next trio, when we have a need for one that is, after the common Cat Traits: Hoover, Ralph and Whizzer (the last named after a Supreme Court justice). Not that I am suggesting we’d own a cat who pees all over the place, it’s just that we get a lot of clumps in the litter box, so it’s clearly a major source of cat entertainment.

    Dr. Phil

  71. I’d first suggest, “Whatever” for the bounty of meta confusion it might cause in this space.

    Other suggestions include:

    – Darwin (in honor of the man, and your contributions to his cause)
    – Dante (or, Alighieri, which is fun to pronounce)
    – Schrödinger (rather obvious provenance)
    – Scratch (he looks a little devilish if yu ask me… and there’s a pun there for a bonus.)

  72. If you’re going to name him after B-movies, “Klaatu Baradu, um, Necktie!” is a twofer. Plus, as a Science Fiction Author, that gives you classic cred as well as modern chops.

  73. Off of the TempCAT idea, how about:

    Imp (short for impermanent)
    Evan (short for evanescent)
    Backup (no relation to Veronica Mars’ dog, but a back-up cat?)

    or, for ironic effect: Eternal cat, or E.C. (easy?)

  74. Glad to hear you’re keeping the little furball. Here’s my suggestions:

    Skitty (say it… Skitty-kitty!)

    Leonidas (he just looks like an imposing figure from history!)

    Chat Kat

    Mr. Huggins (or simply Huggins)


  75. Tempcat is a good description of the creature you’ve found yourselves to be in the possession of. That’s right, the cat owns you, but at least you get to name it.

    1/ Lutton, farther up suggested TC, so why not spell it out as Teecee? Of course, if this were to win I’d cede victory to Lutton.

    2/ As your newest cat seems to be a good generic cat, Arkey, short for archetype might work, too.

    That’s all i have in the way of names. I’m confident you’ll end up calling this cat something that fits its personality even after you name it. (Playing futurist now) in the future, after the naming ceremony you notice that your new cat stretches a lot, one of you in the Scalzi home will get the brainwave to call him Simmons, and well, that name is the one that sticks.


    3/ Simmons (after either Gene, or Richard depending on temperment.)


  76. In light of the picture: “Imperator Galactica” (Imp for short)

    And, to #38… .anyone who reads this blog and doesn’t know who Pixel is ought to be flogged with a cat o’ nine tails. :-)

  77. Mr. Bigglesworth from Austin Powers

    Since TempCat is not longer a temp, how about Full-Time Cat or Perm-Cat.



  78. Temp Cat is a perfectly cromulent name. Or, I might suggest:

    1. Harry (Creek)
    2. Campbell
    3. Dammit (you will call him this from time to time, whether you formally name him that or not)
    4. Whatever (after your blog, of course)

  79. From your description he sounds a lot like Barack Obama ;^) How about “Obama” or “Bamma” or somesuch? To commemorate the year the cat arrived chez Scalzi.

  80. Tempus, for short, temp for even shorter.

    If I had attended U of C, I am sure I would be able to do the full name of Tempus Fugit (felinus pounceous, or whatever “cat pounces” would be in Latin).

    BTW, 3 cats is hugely more entertaining than 2. Three is the minimal pride number. See Simmel on the triad and all that.

  81. 1) Nermal (from Garfield and if he wanders off then you can say the other cats shipped him to Abu Dahbi)
    2) Lamren (Nermal backwards and sounds like it would be in “The Name of the Wind”)
    3) Um (Thus everyone who calls him this will always be stuck in a thought process)
    4)Snarf (thundercats)
    5)Apollo (the God and kinda goes with Athena)

  82. 1. Oliver and/or Twist – showed up cold and hungry
    2. Hobo – showed up cold and hungry
    3. Fixture – no longer temp
    4. Drac – great black tuxedo
    5. Chauncey – sure found the right home by chance

  83. Like many others I like TempCat. But if he is hired he is no longer TC. I don’t know him so I really can’t sugest a good name.

  84. Discussions like this always remind me of one of my favorite quotes:

    It’s an interesting fact that fewer than 17 % of Real cats end their lives with the same name they started with. Much family effort goes into selecting one at the start (“She looks like a Winnifred to me”), and the as the years roll by it suddenly finds itself being called Meepo or Ratbag.

    — (Terry Pratchett, The Unadulterated Cat)

    My most recent cat never did have a single, official name; depending on our moods, he went back and forth between The Kibbinator (he loved his kibble), Mr. Kibbs, The Cat of 1000 Names, Zombie Bob Johnson, and Inky (he was, naturally, a white cat). Don’t worry too hard about what name you pick; it’ll probably change at some point, anyway!

  85. TempCat is perfect, because you’ll wind up calling him “TC,” which *he* can think stands for TopCat.

    (At least, I hope you wind up calling him “TC,” because if you don’t – if you keep calling him TempCat – he’s likely to develop an insecurity-based neurosis.)

  86. I cast another vote for TempCat.

    Or Robert Paulson.

    I also second Ed’s vote for Brock Sampson, and deCadmus’s vote for Schroedinger. And PermaCat also sounds good. And I enjoy the hijinks of Scratch Fury in PVP as well. (Speaking of comic-book cats, if nobody’s mentioned Percival/Percy from Sinfest, I offer up that as a name.)

    My originality must be at a low ebb today, but other people’s is flowing just fine so I must commend their efforts.

    My own suggestion: Pulsar. Percival Pulsar the Third.

  87. With all of the Heinlein fans around, I was sure someone would have suggested Petronius or “Pete,” from The Door into Summer) by now. Since Pete is my favorite SF cat, I’ll toss that name into the hat.

  88. By the time I got to this post, there were already 188 replies. The idea I had seemed so obivous, I was certain someone would already bring it forth. So I slogged through all 188 posts, and lo, nobody suggested:

    John Perry

  89. Somehow that picture makes me think of General Mattson.

    So I’m voting “Mattson“.

    But, yeah, TempCat is a pretty good name, too…

  90. How about:
    1. Blastit (Get off the couch, blastit! Could be worse.)
    2. LiferCat ( He’s here forever).
    3. TenureCat (Ditto)
    4. Pork Chop ( Keeping in the food chain.)
    5. Pynkough (Keeping with your politics.)

  91. 1. Adrian
    2. Kilroy
    3. Frio
    4. Fiction Cat, or Fic or Ficcy for short.
    5. Zoe seems appropriate, since you’re writing her story and all at the moment.

  92. I’s vote for what you has already named him, Temp.Cat. Ha ha Not that he is .You. took. him. to. the. vet. Admit it, he owns you. Tho if you want to admit your weakness I’d second Mr fuzzypant,.

  93. 1 Kitto (he matches our black and white cat that we named Kitto)
    http://www.flickr.com/photos/bytehead/557570497/ for comparison
    2. Copcar – He’s a black and white
    3. Trey – Third cat (I did this to cat Number Six at the vet’s, which I thought was appropriate the time. It helped that I was hearing The Prisoner’s theme song at the time)
    4. BiColor. Pretty descriptive.
    5. Lokai (from TOS’s “Let That be Your Last Battlefield”)

  94. Holy crap! Look at all the comments already! lol

    1. TempCat
    2. Sawyer (once ‘Lost’, now found, get it?)
    3. Perry (after John Perry, from your books)
    4. Harry (he just looks like one)
    5. Android (another shout out to a book of yours)

  95. 1. Pete- What can I say? I loved that book (Door Into Summer)
    2. Rumtumtugger-from “Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats”
    3. James Bond- he’s dressed for it
    4. Mr. Bill (of OPUS fame)
    5.Jack Sparrow (my son’s idea)

  96. Not that it negates the greatness of the idea, but a family member of mine already has a cat named Temp (shortened from Temporary Cat). It’s a good name.

    Otherwise, my suggestion: Medic

    Be sure to call for him outdoors in the evenings.

  97. Kendra #184:

    Good point. I therefore offer a few of my cat’s superfluous nicknames. He has plenty to spare.

    1. Fanghead
    2. Flathead
    3. Furbert
    4. Vermin (Verm to his friends)
    5. Fuzzbutt

  98. can you name a cat like this?

    (Actually, maybe you’d be best doing so, now that I think about it; I had a cat named Weasel because she pissed me off so much the first week I had her that I called her, “That god-damned weaselbrained cat!” While I normally wait for the cat to clue me into their name, perhaps sometimes, it’s best to hand it over to a bunch of strangers.)

  99. C80
    Chinese Ed

  100. I personally can’t see anything other than Temp Cat fitting him now. It’s the only name that seems to hold up to the likes of Lopsided Cat and Ghlaghghee.

  101. So here we goes:

    1. Tac N’mad (Damn cat backwards, so you get all of the swearage power and none of the embarassed looks)
    2. MacCheesy
    3. Apple Diapers (my student suggested the name, I don’ have any clue)
    4. TINAD (This Is Not A Dog)
    5. Skully (because another student likes it)

  102. Well, someone already suggested “Bob”, so…

    Lloyd (just because I’ve always liked that name)
    King of the Road
    Lucky (really, I can’t believe no one suggested that already!)
    Whatever (in honor of the blog)

  103. 1. Hemingway (although he’s not polydactyl, so it’s not entirely apt)
    2. Paradigm
    3. Miscellany
    4. MacDuff
    5. Pollock

  104. I looked at the picture for a bit, this is what I came up with

    1) Carthoris
    2) Igli
    3) Spot
    4) Frumious
    5) Agamemnon

    But I really have to go with the TC suggestion, so you can keep and use Temp Cat/Truman Capote/Tricky Critter/’Tupid Cat/Testicularly Challenged/etc..

    Congratulations on the arrival of a new family member.

  105. 1.) Phellohiwon — It has it all. When you’re mad at it, the name has “hell” in it; when you’re not mad it has “hello”. You can spell Ohio with the name. It has the words “hi” and “won” in it. Or, if you will, “hi i won”. (I’ll take a copy of The Android’s Dream, signed please.) Backwards the name is Nowiholleph. You could name the Scalzi compound that — like Kipling named his place here in Brattleboro Naulakha — in honor of little Phellohiwon. And it has the phonetic (something I know you like, witness Ghlaghghee) for the first part of feline in “Phel”. And when calling it, you could shorten the name to Phello and as it arrives at your feet offer it a “Good Phello”…On the other hand, if it steals something and gets convicted for it, if you say the name quickly it sounds like “felon”. Or, if it makes fine civic contributions in your great state you could even squeeze “fellow ohioan” out of it. So, basically, with this name you’re ready for anything. Truly, this is the Swiss Army Knife of cat names.


    2.) Just “Scalzi’s Cat”, duh. (As I’m sure you will use this one for various thought experiments. Probably including bacon.)

    PS — Good #1 choice from commenter #12 above.

  106. Call him “Temp Cat,” and his nickname will be “T.C.” We named our Russian Blue “T.C.” (“The Cat”), and we never tire of the way he alerts to the sibilant sound of his name.

  107. Obviously his name has always been George (as in hug him & kiss him & call him…). Great Bugs Bunny reference.

    Or you could go for Yeti!

    Damn, wish my apartment allowed cats. I miss the purring.

  108. Anthony B. got there first with the pun, but the original’s always good:
    1) Cthulu.
    2) Pluto, to reference a famous moment from this site’s past.

    And then, thinking about the fact that he’s black and white:
    3) Casablanca
    4) Citizen Cat

    5) Zarquon (aka Zarquon Lord of the Universe), from Hitchhiker’s Guide.

  109. (The) Inspector
    Fermi (Fur Me?)
    Mishap (Hap or Happy for short)
    Neevil (As in, “an evil” stuck together, like from Chronicles of Narnia)

  110. …uh.

    Temp Cat, however such a good name, can’t possibly apply, as he’s obviously been given the full-time position after temp-ing for a while.

    1. FNG! (What you call every freakin’ new guy)
    2. The Hire
    3. Perm Cat
    4. Exempt
    5. Michael Bolt On (He’s a bolt-on yer family)

  111. I’m voting for TempCat because of the wide array of features it provides.

    Welcome to your new TempCat!

    Many people are unaware of the wide variety of operating modes available in the TempCat line of fine, fine products.

    Depending upon your model (TempCatHome TempCatMedia TempCatPro TempCatOffice TempCatServer) you may have one or more of the following operating modes available (*not all options available for all TempCat versions (**see file “Operating Manual With Critical Warnings and Warranty Information” provided in TampCat setup CD (***TempCat warranty void without proper installation and setup service provided by TempCat, Ltd, SA))):

    [list of features, not suggestions]

    TempusedaxrerumCat [time, devourer of all things]

    And More!

  112. Trace (as in tres, Spanish for three (the third cat))
    Script (as in Script Kitty)
    Five (as in Cat 5)
    Don Diego de la Vega (in honor of #236.1 above)

  113. 1) Interrobang
    2) Interrupting Cat (who can then actively participate in the end of the interrupting animals line of knock-knock jokes)
    3) • (pronounced “Spot”, to accompany Ghlaghghee)
    4) Ender (the Xenocide to mice)
    5) Symmetrical Cat (or Symmie for short)

  114. 1. InternCat™
    2. Lady (I’m quite aware he was male once.)
    3. TempCat® (Now with registered trademark!)
    4. Bond James Bond
    5. Elrond Hubbard (Who sent Frodo to audit the Dark Lord by dunking The One Ring in…a volcano!)

  115. I do like Temp Cat(tm) and Tenured Cat(tm) — the latter being the upgraded version? Some other suggestions though:

    – Garth Marenghi

    – l33tcat

    – Cheezburger

    – T-Rex

    – Giblets

  116. Temp Cat (TM) really is a good one, but here are my recommendations:

    1) Loudmeowth
    2) RodentBane (doesn’t that just sound like an awful D&D name?)
    3) BaconCat 2.0 (now with more bacon!)
    4) LOLcat (mentioned above)
    5) PermaCat(TM) (also mentioned above)

  117. Templeton/Templar (Then you can still call him Temp.)
    Boxey (I’m a new and old BSG fan)
    James Bond

    I remember that it takes time to find just the right name for a fuzzy new member of the family.

  118. Pip R. Lagenta – San Francisco – I make little videos for the YouTube machine. http://www.youtube.com/user/PipLagenta http://www.flickr.com/photos/pip_r_lagenta/ www.facebook.com/pip.r.lagenta http://www.zazzle.com/morbiusathome
    Pip R. Lagenta

    Pip (sorry, I had to)

  119. With an expression like that on his face there’s only one name that would do TempCat(tm) justice:



  120. 1. Mercury
    2. Sheep (don’t upset visitors, confuse them!)
    3. Hayu (ditto)
    4. Leukemia (you’ll find out how superstitious you and your friends are)
    5. Lucky (Because he is. N.B. I know a woman who named her fluffy dog Lucky, he got run over at 9 months.)

  121. I think Scrivener by itself would be a fine name for a felid.

    Or Quillcatch (if there’s a talent for capturing feathered dinosaurs).

    Standard somehow occurs to be.

  122. Er, “Standard” occurs to me. Not be.

  123. 1. Tiglath Pilesar III. (“We’re the Mesopotamians!”)
    2. Hedge. Because he always looks kind of spiky in his pics.
    3. Pooka.
    4. Morpheus. (“Phooey.”)
    5. Fizzgig.

    Our cats are Percival and Nimuë. By some freak chance, Percival’s actually retained his name pretty well, though he’s also known as “fluffy-butt.” Nimuë is most commonly “Mui” or “Mui-cat.”

  124. Patrick Johanneson – Canada, eh – Patrick Johan­neson writes sci­ence fic­tion and fan­tasy, works elbow-deep in WordPress code, teaches judo, and volunteers at a small indie cin­ema. He lives in Man­i­toba with his wife Kathleen.
    Pat J

    Cat’s name: Minou. It’s a French thing, I think.

    Also: Those chairs look to be exactly like the ones we had in the house when I was growing up, only shinier.

  125. Call him TC. Which is short for Temp Cat, but also for Top Cat, and TC is what Top Cat’s gang always used to call him. Face it, if you did call him Temp Cat you’d probably end up shortening it to TC in daily usage anyway.

  126. I had a kid ask me today if I had a frindle. My immediate thought was how that would be a cool cat name. Freaky coincidence?
    My suggestions are:

    I can’t wait to see what you all decide.

  127. Keith Glass – Cyber Security Geek. Long-time fanboy. Gamer. Punster. Wields Snark at +5 normally, gets a Vorpal Snark at 96 or better on a d100. . .
    Keith G.


    Ia Ftagn MeowMix !!!

  128. Mewl (mule)

    Bubba has always been a family favorite nickname for our male cats.

    Mowzer (A black and white cat I had way back when. He was a favorite. Sounds like yours has a similar personality.)

    Fred (I actually typed this before I saw that Mark Whybird had already suggested it. This name really works.)

  129. Gender’s not right, color’s not quite right, but personality absolutely fits.


    (Memory/A Civil Campaign for those who went “huh?”

  130. Scruff.

    ‘Cause he looks a bit.. scruffy, like he’s been riding the rails for a while. A cat with attitude, not pulchritude.

    “Tude” comes to mind as a possibility, also. (“The ‘Tude endures.” — The Big Meowski)

    Dichotomy, from the black/white coloration.

  131. 1. Throckmorton.

    It’s the only name you require; there’s no need to submit 4 more suggestions.

    But if you must have 5:

    2. Throckmorton.
    3. Throckmorton.
    4. Throckmorton.
    5. Phil

    While the beauty of Throckmorton is self-evident, the advantage of is that it is suitable for abbreviation as T-cat, which harkens to Temp-Cat.

  132. I read a goodly way down to realize that my suggestion of Tenure was already taken- but I do not recall an entry immortalizing the felis silvestris catus belonging to Commander Data of TNG.

    Therefore, I submit “Spot”.

  133. A couple of my suggestions have already been mentioned, although not in exacty the same form.

    Petronius Arbiter – not only a tribute to Heinlein’s “Door Into Summer”, but a potentially descriptive phrase, depending upon whether or not he ends up as the alpha cat.

    TeeCee – because he is the Third Cat.

    Kemo Sabe – aka “The Lone Ranger”, from that head-on photo of the masked face.

    Phooey – the name that my son, then five, gave to one of many, many, many stray cats that my wife has adopted over the years. I immediately adopted his suggestion with the comment, “That’s appropriate – Phooey, another da*n cat!”

    With best wishes,
    – Tom –

  134. OK, I got to comment 175 and was going cross-eyed…so I gave up trying to see if anyone suggested my thoughts yet. Here goes:

    1. The instant I saw TC, I thought “Aww! He looks like an Oreo.” So, Oreo.
    2. Why! (Why? Because it’s a great excuse to get all dramatic if he runs away. You can throw yourself to your knees all over the neighborhood, throw your hands heavenward and scream WHY!!! WHY!!!! Heck, you can do that even when you just call him in for dinner.)
    3. Leo
    4. Tiger (because why should all the orange striped ones get that cool name?)
    5. and yeah…TC (formerly known as Temp Cat) is cute. I’m NOT bowing to peer pressure.

  135. In the same spirit: Nonhabet taken from this story http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pope_Joan

    There were associated legends as well. In the 1290s the Dominican Robert of Uzès recounted a vision in which he saw the seat “where, it is said, the Pope is proved to be a man”. By the 14th century, it was believed that two ancient marble seats, called the sedia stercoraria, which were used for enthroning new Popes in the Basilica of St. John Lateran had holes in the seats that were used for determining the gender of the new Pope. It was said that the Pope would have to sit on one of the seats naked, while a committee of cardinals peered through the hole from beneath, before declaring, “Testiculos habet et bene pendentes” — “He has testicles, and they dangle nicely.” Not until the late 15th century, however, was it said that this peculiar practice was instituted in response to the scandal of the 9th century female Pope.

    Sorry, couldn’t resist. Sorry about the double post.

  136. Wow, go go gadget post count!

    A couple more:

    NPC (Non-Politically Correct? Non-Player Character? Non-Procreating Cat? you decide)
    Trogdor (yes a few years old, but still a fave)
    Gorn (I think he could take Shatner)

  137. It’s a boy?
    1 – Clark (for Superman)
    2 – Bruce (for Batman)
    3 – Hal (one of the more popular Green Lanterns)
    4 – Ringo (one of the less popular Beatles, but always my favorite for some reason)
    5 – a president who we only call by their initials, LBJ, JFK, FDR, you pick.

  138. amandageddon – She is a slacker of the highest order, a geek of not so much, went back to school to become an even bigger geek and possibly get paid for it. She loves it when a plan comes together.

    1) TempCat(tm!)
    2) Cat5 (as in the cable) or just Five
    3) Pet 3 of 4 (BORG!)
    4) S.P.A.M. (which could be anything like: Samuel Promethus Asimov McCaffrey)
    5) Catzer Söze (or just Söze)

    I’ve always wanted to get a cat (if I weren’t allergic) or a dog (PUPPY!) and name it SPAM.

  139. 1. Remainder (from Stephen King’s band, the Rock Bottom Remainders)
    2. Raymond Burr’s Cat (RBC for short) — (from the alternate name for Stephen King’s Band — Raymond Burr’s Legs)
    3. Pete (For Petronius the Arbiter, from Heinlein)
    4. Baldric
    5. Cat (simple, descriptive, and really the only thing he’ll ever respond to)

  140. – Big Dick Mouser

    – The Deuce

    – Kody’s Lunch

    – What, am I not good enough?…. Ghalghalee only

    – Captain Scratch

    – Khat

    – Hey,you…

    – Homeless Cat

    – Hugo

    – Whatever

    – Mr. Loves His Wine

    – The Avian Scourge

    – Something to f*ck with John’s head enough so that he starts writing Horror.

    – Puddy Tat

    – Battle Cat

    – Found P*ssy

    – The King Of Bradford Ohio

    – Contingency Plan, or “We May Have To Eat This If My Next Novel Blows”

    – Cat-thee

    – MC Skat Katt

    – Itty Bitty Kitty

    – Fat Cat

  141. amandageddon – She is a slacker of the highest order, a geek of not so much, went back to school to become an even bigger geek and possibly get paid for it. She loves it when a plan comes together.

    Hey Stacey, I think that’s a little more than 5 names.

  142. How about something conferring his regal status:

    1. POTUS (President of the United States)

    2. SCOTUS (Supreme Court…)

    3. POTSH (President of the Scalzi Household)

  143. -Holstein (“Holly” for short; this has the benefit of being a lovely Red Dwarf reference)

    -Dave (everyone needs a cat named Dave, as in “I’m sorry, Dave, I’m afraid I can’t do that.”)

    -Permacat (this would invariably end up with us calling him “Parmalat” around my house)

    -Loki (god of mischief… yeah, it’s asking for trouble, but it’s served us well with our elder male feline)


  144. Five monickers coming at you:

    ?. Wisdom Like Silence

    ?. Bill

    ?. Death of Rodents

    ?. Wage Slave

    ?. Scalene

    “Explain them?” Oh, very well…

    [1] See List of Culture ships.
    [2] = William Howard Taft, or Bill the Cat.
    [3] Loud: always TALKS IN TITLE CASE.
    [4] Obviously not a Temp Cat anymore – he’s in for the long haul.
    [5] Consider the relationship triangle among three cats, no two of which are equal.

  145. Darn, drh (#175) already took mine — I like Fugit (short for Tempus Fugit) too, because you can always pronounce it with a short u and hard g if you’re feeling peeved or the “other people” aren’t around.

  146. It just hit me: TempCat should be named Virtue.

    As in A Cat Named Virtue, by the Weakerthans. (Which is a song that somebody, maybe even Scalzi, linked up on this blog, thus exposing me to it.)

    Click here to listen, if you haven’t heard or don’t remember this song:

    A Cat Named Virtue

    Virtue gives wise advice:
    “Lie down;
    lick the sorrow from your skin.
    Scratch the terror and begin
    to believe you’re strong.”

  147. 1) Pixel
    2) Mungojerrie
    3) Chip
    4) Cthulhu (depending upon temperment
    5) That’s all I could think of. I actually like TempCat best.

  148. 1. Penguin -Well, he does look like one!
    2. Ronin-A masterless Samurai
    3. PermCat- Obviously not temp anymore.
    4. Mr. Fluffy Pants-Self explanatory.
    5. Yin Yang-He prolly looks like a Yin Yang symbol when he is curled up in a ball.

  149. Wow, what a load of suggestions!

    1) TempCat (awesome name)

    However, if not…

    2) Lobo (because, dude, LOOK: http://images.google.com/images?q=lobo&ndsp=20&svnum=10&um=1&hl=en&client=safari&rls=en&start=0&sa=N
    Sorry for the long link, but the first page of images is what you want: comic book character, total bad-ass. Wish we’d thought of naming our cat Lobo, but we didn’t think of it at the time)

    3) Going on the Hitler theme, I know someone who named their cat Kitler, a name which amuses me to no end, though I’m not sure if it should…

    4) Lastly, we named our black and white cat Storm Shadow, after my finace’s favorite GI Joe, the ninja with black and white camouflage.

  150. I always wanted to name my next cat Cardinal Fang, or fang, for short.

    It always reminds me of people who call yip dogs Killer.

  151. Amanda… John knows how I work. He wants 5… I give 50…maybe 5 of them are good.

    “Quantity has a quality all its’ own”

  152. I wrote 50, and none were better than “Chairman Meow” in post #1. The rest of us are a children’s choir that Pavoratti warmed up the crowd for.

    I should add that I’m French, and “Chairman Meow” might not work if you don’t sound like Julia Childs when you speak English.

    Also.. I should add that I brought my new puppy into school when I was teaching, and let a bunch of ghetto thug students name it out of the history book.

    “You should name that sh*t ‘Hitler,’ teach”


    “Naw…all seroius. Quiet is kept, but ain’t nobody else got a dog named ‘Hitler.’ ”

    “There is most likely a reason for that, Antoine.”

    They then suggested:

    – Atilla (which works on a pit bull, not a lab/border collie)

    – Mohammed

    – Ramses (which is a condom, I’m told)

    – Stalin

    – etc…

    One of my kids- from Southie, of course, wanted me to name it “Whitey,” after a well-known Boston mob leader. My dog is jet black, I should mention.

    While we’re debating this, my new puppy has found a Boston Herald, which she proceeds to tear into shreds. This prompts Bashaw- a 300 pound kid from Trinidad who rarely spoke- to say “Damn… that’s a sloppy dog.”

    20 kids … “yeah… you ought to name her Sloppy Dog!!!”

    The animation of the children’s response of course lures the dog over, and she immediately starts licking Bashaw’s face. Bashaw- who has since killed someone- could only lay on the floor and laugh.

    20 kids, again…”Look…she likes it!! Yo, Sloppy Dog!”

    It was THIS cute…my heart beat my brain… and I now have a pet named Sloppy Dog.

    Don’t fall into the same trap.

  153. I, too, must express my liking for Tempcat. But, here’s my 5 suggestions anyway:

    1) Rico (yes, blatant appeal to Heinlein… but it’s a cool name)
    2) Harley (rides which also have been known to purr)
    3) Dev-Null (geeky computer reference, but also a cool name)
    4) Ramius
    5) Uther

    Good luck with tempcat!

  154. Obviously, given his coloring, Harlequin and Domino would be choices. Tempura would fit with his earlier moniker and give him some Japanese culture, or Temptation or Tempetuous.

  155. 1. Vodka – 007 came to mind right off.

    2. Nebuchadnezzar – Because I don’t care if my neighbors think I’m weird.

    3. Jupiter – too much time reading science news

    4. Sven – because everyone needs one

    and 5. Odysseus – he traveled far to arrive home.

  156. Pre-naming recommendation:
    Stop getting new cats, before it’s too late. (I believe it’s too late for me; we are at 6 adopted strays, in 12 years, and that’s too many).

    Pre-naming note:
    My last 6 cats were named (in reverse chronological order):
    6. Scruffy (the wonder one-eyed cat)
    5. Neko
    4. Mr Grey (formerly Ms Grey, we mis-sexed on first encounter)
    3. Juju (never, ever name a black cat this. He’s grown from 6 oz and 6 inches long to 30 lbs of monster muscle now and is indeed bad luck, if very loving and friendly)
    2. Shanachie
    1. Seachay (we didn’t name her, her former now deceased owner did)

    Name suggestions:
    5. Cache
    4. B&W (not greyscale, obviously…)
    3. You
    2. Inkblot
    and finally…
    1. Whatever the cat responds to

  157. To expand on myself at #303: A cat named “Nietzsche” has “Friedrich” as its first name, obviously. When, in the fullness of time, said feline gets chubbier (don’t they always), you would then be known as “Fat Freddie’s Human.”

  158. Chicktar – St. Louis, Missouri, USA – I am a pretty hard-working attorney, primarily blogging to keep a record for myself of my goals, failures and successes in the non-professional aspects of my life. Currently, those are family and friends, quilting, reading and photography. But they are always evolving...


  159. CC (Creationist Cat)

    So-long (as in “so long, and thanks for all the fish”)



    cooking (as in “I’ve just tripped over the cooking fat”

  160. Floccinaucinihilipilificator (because this is what cats are born to do)

    Chiaroscuro (colouring)

    Epicaricacy (again, it’s a cat)

    Ailurophobe (give the thing a complex)

    Bob (it’s a classic, and since you’ve taken its balls I can’t suggest Giacomo after the other cat I’ve lived with)

  161. 1. Bix (Beiderbecke)
    2. Rollo (of Normandy, a Viking)
    3. SZ (Sakall, aka “Cuddles”)
    4. Red (What’s black and white and “red” all over?–sorry, couldn’t resist)
    5. Bertram (Wooster)

  162. You should borrow one of these names (like our family did for our cats) for your new “Cat”…. as in cha, cha, cha.

    1. Chewbacca, Chewie for short; unnhh hunnnh that’s what I said.
    2. A.L.F. As in the NBC series by the same name.

    I will admit it works better if the cat is a male orange tabby.

  163. I like medical terms:
    Bezoar — hairball
    and there’s always Kitty (which we call both of our cats, even though neither are named that)

  164. I suppose I might as well throw my ideas out there.

    1. Edgeworth
    2. Loki
    3. Cartography
    4. Maverick
    5. Drake

    Not the most creative, I’m sure, but eh. SO IT GOES. I like ’em.

  165. My Heavens – Sure are a lot of people who want that free book of yours, John!
    My suggestions:
    Chocolate Chippers
    Moo Moo

  166. Hopefully these haven’t been used yet…

    1. Dirk Gently

    I know, it’s a bit lame, but I’m reading those novels right now and would name just about anything Dirk, or Gently, or both. Maybe you could name your fridge Dirk if you didn’t want to use the name on the cat… Actually, I myself may do that one.

    2. Earl

    3. Interloper

    4. Schrödinger

    5. Till

    The last one being a play on the fact that up ’till now he’s been a temp. Though I suppose it’s a play on impermanence in general.

  167. I do like Temp Cat (TM), but what about the next cat who drops into your life? Hmm. How about “T2” (for the *next* cat — you have plenty of suggestions for this one already!)?

  168. Hello John,

    We have two names for the cat:

    1. Kitty (all of our cats have that name)

    2. Irish (my wife’s name for her early pet cat)

  169. Well, this probably won’t get read, much less chosen, but I’d go for…ChiChi LaSparkle.

    Doesn’t matter that he’s a he. He can be a drag queen, god darn it.

  170. Had a cat with similar markings named Bartholomew. Freqeuntly walked about the house with the same sulky expression. Therefore, I offer you the use of his “other” name:

    Tharbolomew (or just Tharb for short)

    Off topic – had a cat with very little personality that just didn’t name himself – cat was almost 1 year old and still unnamed – people would ask the cat’s name and our response was “Ask him, he’s not telling us.” Finally named the cat Ask-em (or Ask-him, spellling was a bit dodgy).

  171. 1/Cooking Fat
    2/Cfer (for cat)
    3/Spartacus (I..am Spartacus!)
    Anything..just please don’t call him Lucky. We get more cats called Lucky in the emergency room than anything else

  172. Shiva – The consort of Kali and one of the five faces of the devine. Plus sounds cool

    Shiva – Dont!
    Shiva – Stop Fighting!
    Shiva – Come here.

  173. TeeCee, for TempCat TM, is a great calling name. It’s two syllabes and ends with the high ‘ee’ note, which according to some self-proclaimed experts makes it easier for the animal to recognize it’s being called.
    I agree with other posters: your first impulse is best. And it’s certainly the only TempCat TM out there.

  174. One more non-eligible entry:

    Jesus. Pronounced as in the Spanish “Hay-soos,” but imagine the buzz you’ll generate when you can blog things like, “Jesus coughed up a hairball in the living room this morning” or, “Jesus is finally getting the hang of using his litterbox.”

    /awaiting death by lightning strike in 3…2…1…

  175. Damn. I thought I had one that nobody else had, but Bob had my choice back at 253:

    >TempCat® (Now with registered trademark!)

    As I tend to agree that, with permanency, your cat should be upgraded to an assertion of actual registered trademark protection.

    Although, come to think of it, perhaps TempCat© is rather more your bag.

    (Not that I expect to win or anything, but don’t you still owe me a book from a contest, like, YEARS ago?)

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