28 Comments on “Progress Update”

1. Awsome! I look forward to reading it!

   And congradulations on (almost) finishing!

2. I hope you have it to Patrick by Monday. Because I don’t like the alternative.

3. That is, I want you posting your traditional post-mortem entry, and not another member of your family. Though your cat’s view could be interesting.

4. “…if I don’t have it to him on Monday, I’ll probably shoot myself.”

   Seems like a waste of a golden opportunity. Why not auction off — for charity, of course — chances to publicly Taser you*? Something to think about!

   * Bro.

5. I see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it’s not an oncoming train.

   I used this exact phrase a couple of days ago – it’s a good one, I must admit.

   Good luck with the rest of the book!

6. Blather Limiter ON.

   Blather Limiter ON.

   Blather Limiter ON!

   Dammit, this button doesn’t seem to be working.

7. Shooting yourself would, of course, void the massive insurance policy that Tor likely has taken out on you. It would be much more fair to Patrick and the folks at Tor to arrange for an “accident” (like, say, Ghlaghghee falling on your head) that would allow them to recoup their investment (although I’m assuming they’d still fall back on their contingency plan of having Laurell K. Hamilton churn out the remainder of the book based on your notes).

   Then again, finishing the book would probably be even simpler for everyone involved. Ghlaghghee included.

8. Re: shooting self. Self is very rarely the problem. I say: direct violence toward source of problem.

9. G’luck John.

   Remember, save and backup often. Computers suck. ;)

10. In fact, save… right… NOW!
    There, don’t you feel better?

11. @7: Presumably they have Ghost Writer Brigades to handle that.

12. Ghost Writer Brigades would be a Great name for a band!
    Dibs!

13. By all means finish it by Monday! I don’t want to hear about no shooting.

14. Good luck, John! You’re doing very well procrastination-wise (which is to say, not much of that at all). Bravo!

15. Go, John, go!

    And you are not allowed to shoot yourself. Because you have to be President.

16. I’m seeing a great prank w/ a blank gun, a couple of liters of Karo syrup w/ red dye #5, and a web cam. *

    *Safety Notice: Do Not Try This At Home. Even blanks can kill you! Just ask Brandon Lee.

17. You have two frontal lobes?

18. Frank @17
    Luckily he always keeps a spare

19. What Shawn said. Now!

    Of course, you know, you just jinxed yourself. Try the salt over the shoulders, spin widdershins thrice and spit solution.

20. Please don’t shoot yourself John. Besides, you’ve already written the
    ending. How hard can it be to add a little more filler?

21. “Safety Notice: Do Not Try This At Home. Even blanks can kill you! Just ask Brandon Lee.”

    Or, better yet, Jon Erik-Hexum.

22. Can’t wait!

    Hey, what about the –

    Oh, dang! He got away!

23. So why can’t you tell the editor that John Scalvi has almost completed the book, and it would be submitted post hoc. Didn’t that work for Mark Twain, George Eliot, and others who had nom de plumes?

24. Just be sure to shoot yourself… with your bare hands! Gretchen would be so proud.

25. I’ve told Patrick that if I don’t have it to him on Monday, I’ll probably shoot myself.

    I don’t remember you telling me that. I can probably wait for an ARC though.

26. You didn’t say what you’d shoot yourself with. That’s one heck of a loophole.

27. Unfocused raises a very good point. It’s not much of a threat if you end up shooting yourself with a squirt gun or a bottle of mustard.

    Uh, not that I’m advocating that you take any drastic actions. You do realize the chances of you becoming famous after your death are slim, right?

28. I’d want to see video of any shootings with a bottle of mustard.