Your Home Improvement Tip For The Day

From time to time, you may discover that your sink has become clogged with a large mat of hair. When this happens you must take action. First, grab your bathroom plunger, like so:

Then, apply the plunger directly to the mat of hair clogging the sink.

Vigorously move the plunger up and down to develop sufficient suction.

It’s just that easy!

Warning: Depending on conditions, your mat of hair may be entirely unamused by your actions.

45 Comments on “Your Home Improvement Tip For The Day”

  1. Love the last picture!

    So, do you typically move the cat? Or do you go find another sink? [I generally go find another sink, as payback is a really annoyed kitty who can puke on demand. But then I’m well aware who really rules the house….]

  2. I thought I was the only one with this problem…now I know I’m not alone. Thanks for the tip–I’ve also found that running a steady stream of water (hot or cold) can help extract the clog…

  3. You forgot to mention that Drano and electric snakes are HIGHLY contraindicated for these kinds of DIY tasks. But maybe you didn’t need to.

  4. HAR!

    We have a different hair clog problem in our household; our black feline likes to sleep on the floor in the doorway between the bedroom and the bathroom. At night.

    We’ve taken to doing the foot-sweepy gesture when we walk, for punting her gently is less disastrous than stomping on her.

  5. You forgot to mention: Do not under any circumstances apply bacon to your mat of hair. It won’t solve the problem, and will only serve to get you funny looks.

  6. changterhune – Before you hear lies from Chang Terhune himself, we thought we’d tell you the truth: without us, his old action figures, he’d be nowhere. He loved science fiction from way back and began reading it at an early age, but it was through us that he acted it all out. That’s what led to the writing. He watched a lot of science fiction shows like Star Trek, U.F.O, and movies, too. But we were always there to do his bidding. And it’s like they say: you always forget about the little people on your way up. Oh, the 70’s and early 80’s with him were good times! He’d use these blocks and make all the crazy buildings for us to be in his stories. I gotta say the kid’s imagination was pretty damn fertile. Oh, he had friends, but they just weren’t into it like him. He was like the Lance Armstrong of action figures. And of science fiction. At first, when he began writing in the eighth grade, we didn’t mind. He still made time for us. And we knew that when he was holding us in his sweaty little hands and he got that far off look in his eye, he’d come back to burying us in the back yard or - god forbid! – blowing us up with firecrackers. But it was worth it for a part in one of those stories. We loved him for it. He kept us around even when we were minus a leg or two - or even a head. In that mind of his, he found a use for all of us. Then he discovered girls. October, 1986. It was like the end of the world. One day we’re standing in the middle of this building block creation he’d pretended was some marble city on a planet near Alpha Centauri and the next we were stuck in a box in the closet. Not even a “See ya later!” Nope, it was into the closet, then we heard some high-pitched girly-giggles then silence. We didn’t see him for years. We got word about him once in a while. Heard he took up writing, but it was crap like “The Breakfast Club” only with better music. We couldn’t believe it. Not Charlie. What happened to those aliens with heads he’d sculpted out of wax? Spaceships? Those complex plots? All gone. For what? You guessed it: Girls. Emotions. “Serious fiction.” I tell you, it was like hearing Elvis had left the building. During our two decade exile in the closet, we heard other things about him. He went to college. He wrote a lot, but not much he really liked. We knew it even then. It was like he didn’t dare write science fiction. Some of us had lost hope and just lay there. Others kept vigil, hoping for a day we didn’t dare speak about. Then we heard he’d stopped writing in 1996. Did he come to reclaim us? No. He took up music for ten years or so. He took up yoga. Once in a while, he’d visit us in the closet. But it was half-hearted. His mind was elsewhere. Then one day, he really did come back for us. One second we’re in the dark and the next thing we know we’re in a car headed for Massachusetts. Suddenly we got a whole shelf to ourselves out in broad daylight! Then he bought a bunch of others form some planet called Ebay. He’d just sit and stare at us with that old look. But why were we suddenly back in the picture? He had a wife now, who didn’t mind that he played with us. So what had happened? Turns out he’d never forgotten about those stories. He’d been thinking about all of us and the stories he’d made up and then remembered he’d been a writer once. From the shelf we could see him typing away. Before long he’s got a whole novel together! Then he’s working on another one. Word is there are two more in the planning stages! Some short stories, too! It’s good to see him using his imagination again. Its good to know he never abandoned us. He returned to his true love of science fiction. We hear the stories are pretty good. Someday we’ll get one of the cats to score us a copy of the manuscript. Man, it’s good to be out of the damn closet! --- I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me
    Chang, betwixt demons.

    Awesome! That expression simultaneously says, “WTF?” and “Watch your balls next time your shower or go to the can.”

  7. You do know that cats have a League of Assassins, don’t you?

    Beware the cat whose claw is really a Gom Jabbar!!

  8. Good thing you’ve got a competent woman on the job! If the sink unblocking had been left to you, no doubt we’d just get pictures of the mat for the next two months.

  9. *sniggers*

    That last picture’s your template for a CDF solider before their host personality’s uploaded, right?

  10. I would NEVER be able to resist turning the tap on.

    I see number 4 is where Ghlaghghee (did I get that right?) first noticed the camera… he seems a lot more annoyed by that than the plunging action.

  11. It’s Lopsided Cat, actually. And the pictures are in sequence (number one is a detail of number two).

  12. I believe that’s Lopsided Cat, not Garblegarblegee?

    I can’t believe we’ve gotten 25 comments into a Whatever cat thread with no comment from the Church/Fan Club of Garblegarblegee. They’re slipping.

  13. My new kittens haven’t graduated to the sink yet…too small to make the leap. There has, however been an unfortunate incident with the toilet..during use even!

  14. Nathan:

    Yes. On this end Zeus recently learned the hard way why it was not advisable to hop up on the toilet while it was the process of being used, by me, for bladder evacuation purposes.

    In case you’re all wondering, it happened too fast for me to do anything to stop it. Honestly.

  15. Scalzi – It happens here too. The husband always says the same thing, to the same cat (she’s 14, but apparently still hasn’t learned)

    “Goddammit Kitty! Get out the way before I piss all over you!!”

    She’s also the one that wants to check out what’s going on every time we use the shower. For 14 years…

  16. changterhune – Before you hear lies from Chang Terhune himself, we thought we’d tell you the truth: without us, his old action figures, he’d be nowhere. He loved science fiction from way back and began reading it at an early age, but it was through us that he acted it all out. That’s what led to the writing. He watched a lot of science fiction shows like Star Trek, U.F.O, and movies, too. But we were always there to do his bidding. And it’s like they say: you always forget about the little people on your way up. Oh, the 70’s and early 80’s with him were good times! He’d use these blocks and make all the crazy buildings for us to be in his stories. I gotta say the kid’s imagination was pretty damn fertile. Oh, he had friends, but they just weren’t into it like him. He was like the Lance Armstrong of action figures. And of science fiction. At first, when he began writing in the eighth grade, we didn’t mind. He still made time for us. And we knew that when he was holding us in his sweaty little hands and he got that far off look in his eye, he’d come back to burying us in the back yard or - god forbid! – blowing us up with firecrackers. But it was worth it for a part in one of those stories. We loved him for it. He kept us around even when we were minus a leg or two - or even a head. In that mind of his, he found a use for all of us. Then he discovered girls. October, 1986. It was like the end of the world. One day we’re standing in the middle of this building block creation he’d pretended was some marble city on a planet near Alpha Centauri and the next we were stuck in a box in the closet. Not even a “See ya later!” Nope, it was into the closet, then we heard some high-pitched girly-giggles then silence. We didn’t see him for years. We got word about him once in a while. Heard he took up writing, but it was crap like “The Breakfast Club” only with better music. We couldn’t believe it. Not Charlie. What happened to those aliens with heads he’d sculpted out of wax? Spaceships? Those complex plots? All gone. For what? You guessed it: Girls. Emotions. “Serious fiction.” I tell you, it was like hearing Elvis had left the building. During our two decade exile in the closet, we heard other things about him. He went to college. He wrote a lot, but not much he really liked. We knew it even then. It was like he didn’t dare write science fiction. Some of us had lost hope and just lay there. Others kept vigil, hoping for a day we didn’t dare speak about. Then we heard he’d stopped writing in 1996. Did he come to reclaim us? No. He took up music for ten years or so. He took up yoga. Once in a while, he’d visit us in the closet. But it was half-hearted. His mind was elsewhere. Then one day, he really did come back for us. One second we’re in the dark and the next thing we know we’re in a car headed for Massachusetts. Suddenly we got a whole shelf to ourselves out in broad daylight! Then he bought a bunch of others form some planet called Ebay. He’d just sit and stare at us with that old look. But why were we suddenly back in the picture? He had a wife now, who didn’t mind that he played with us. So what had happened? Turns out he’d never forgotten about those stories. He’d been thinking about all of us and the stories he’d made up and then remembered he’d been a writer once. From the shelf we could see him typing away. Before long he’s got a whole novel together! Then he’s working on another one. Word is there are two more in the planning stages! Some short stories, too! It’s good to see him using his imagination again. Its good to know he never abandoned us. He returned to his true love of science fiction. We hear the stories are pretty good. Someday we’ll get one of the cats to score us a copy of the manuscript. Man, it’s good to be out of the damn closet! --- I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me I'm smarter than you I'm harder than you I'm better than you I'm just raw I'm hotter than you More popular than you More clever than you And goshdarn it, people like me
    Chang, cranky.

    I’m always amazed that I have not yet pissed on the cat or the dog’s head. Amazed, I tell you.

    Oh, wait I did tinkle on the dog last week during a walk in the woods. He snuck up on me.

  17. Love the new banner. Unimpressed Cat is Unimpressed. Now off to figure out where my feral kitten has wandered off to.

  18. As someone who’s owned by two cats, I find none of this surprising. The fact that I’ve had to shove Gouraud off the keyboard to type this should not be surprising to any cat staff.

  19. Re #10. This is whatever. I see no connection to people in their right minds. Am I missing something?

    I am with those who would be unable to resist turning the cold water on full blast. This can not only cure the current clog, but often prevent future ones.

  20. Conversations that happen a little too frequently at my house:

    “Hey! You have to come see this picture.”

    (Amiable scuffling by the Not A Night Person in the house.)

    “(reads aloud captions while scrolling slowly through the pictures, then adds commentary:) This is that blog of that guy I’m always talking about…. Look, his wife is laughing at him, and the cat is Not Amused…. I really need to put those books where you can read them, you need to read them.”

    “Mmm. Whatever…”

    “Yes! Exactly!”

  21. Given the positions of facial whiskers, the relaxed posture, the mostly closed eyes, and the general tone and lift of the fur, I would translate that statement as a long-suffering, “while I appreciate the attention I do not share your fetish for rubber. Please go play with the dog so I can get back to sleep.”

  22. John said, “…it happened too fast for me to do anything to stop it. Honestly.”

    Yeah, I bet that’s what you were trying to say as you were rolling on the floor laughing as Krissy was attempting to find out why the wet cat was running through the house.

  23. @ Mike (40): Oh yes, I did. And Terry Pratchett’s Unadulterated Cat, too. Can openers of the world, don’t bother to unite, the cats have you figured anyway.

  24. To #34 and others:

    I regret to inform you that turning on the faucet regardless of force of water provides a temporary solution at best. The hair mat will return!

  25. I like that you put that pic as your header. :-)

    One way to keep said hair mat out of the sink is to have an equally (or more) annoying drip that refuses to be fixed. works for us. My cat thinks the bathroom is a place to get mommy alone for cuddling with no canine interference.

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