Bill Schafer: THE BEST OF NIGHT RANGER has arrived.
Me: What the fuck is wrong with you.
Bill Schafer: Long list. Little time. At least it’s not the Gary Cherone VH album.
Me: I hear that.
Bill Schafer: Oh Christ. They’re touring with Air Supply.
Bill Schafer: Check Ticketmaster
Me: It’s worse than that. They OPENED for Air supply.
Bill Schafer: You have Journey. I have Night Ranger. We should call it a draw.
Me: Journey never fucking opened for Air Supply.
Bill Schafer: What lead singer are they on now? Shouldn’t they just bill themselves as their own cover band?
Me: No argument in either case. Still: Fucking Air Supply. Seriously. Why not just open for Michael Bolton and just get it over with?
Me: I want to cut and paste this conversation into Whatever. If you’d like I will mask your identity to hide your shame.
Bill Schafer: Fuck no. Out me, you worthless bitch.
Me: I’m only trying to protect you. But, okay. Have it your way.
Bill Schafer: I will call down the NIGHT RANGER legion on you.
Me: That’s you and the creepy guy down your street?
Bill Schafer: Across town. He moved.