The Most Horrible Thing Ever To Happen

According to the techs at my DSL provider, my cable modem, which was apparently four and a half years old, has fried itself in its own juices and they’re sending me a new one. However that will take a couple of days, so unless I transport myself down to the library and suck off their public wifi (as I am doing now), don’t expect to see too much of me here in the next couple of days. Likewise, if you’re sending me e-mail in the next couple of days, don’t expect an immediate response — I’ll be able to read e-mail via the BlackBerry but will only be responding to the urgent ones.

(Also, since someone snarked about it, I do in fact have the ability to moderate comment threads here via e-mail. So don’t think the Mallet of Loving Correction won’t fit through my BlackBerry.)

For those of you who can’t live without me until the cable modem arrives, I’ll most likely be posting inanities via Twitter, which you can follow here (my recent tweets are in the sidebar) or through my Twitter page.

And there it is. See you when I rejoin the 21st Century.

32 Comments on “The Most Horrible Thing Ever To Happen”

  1. I do hope the techs at your DSL provider are actually sending you a DSL Modem as opposed to a cable modem. The latter having a round hole and your phone line being a square plug…

    And as to the moderation — well if we could ALL get on board and be blatantly inappropriate, we could effectively wither away your opposable thumbs and give Ghlaghghee a chance. Anyone? Anyone?


  2. Do you have a UPS for all your high tech gear?

    A whole house surge suppressor may have gotten a couple of more months out of the modem for around $100. It also will protect all the rest of your 21st century gear from possible harm during brown and blackouts as well as the occasional electrical stutter.

  3. my cable modem, which was apparently four and a half years old

    That’s 28 in dial-up modem years.

  4. “unread hordes” ? Funniest Freudian typo I’ve seen in awhile, considering that you’re a writer.
    Zoe’s Tale was awesome, btw.

  5. You could have just told us you didn’t want to do Book Hauls anymore instead of, you know, making up wild excuses.

  6. With all due respect to your sexual freedom, I’m not sure I want to hear about you sucking things off at the library.

  7. I feel your pain.

    I recently spent 2 weeks connection-less due to cockups on the part of Tiscali And my library doesn’t do late night opening….

    Don’t they have special urgnt deliveries for important people such as you?

  8. Sometimes it is faster to just drive to the local cable location and pick up the replacement instead of waiting for a service call. Especially if it is just something you need to plug in.

  9. I would highly suggest you look into how to teather your crackberry to your home network while you’re leeching wifi. I have my blackjack set up to be my backup internet connection for when my comcast goes out once a week or so.

  10. I felt completely naked and powerless before the cold uncaring universe when I was DSL-less. I hope your new one arrives beyond fast and you can fully connect again before you start cyber-withdrawal symptoms like I did.

    On the other hand, perhaps this is all a plot by your pets to make you devote more time to THEM. ;)

  11. I remember buying my own DSL modem at the local Best Buy afer my first one died instead of waiting for the telephone company to mail me one. Yes, I’m that much of an internet addict.

  12. Here’s hoping that you use the time away from teh Internets productively. (I like reading your books so this is a self-serving hope.) I think most of us will be here when you return. And maybe we’ll have some better read Zombies, too.

  13. The library? Come on. You can get free wireless at places to numerous to recite these days. My suggestion: Panera Bread (good sandwiches and soup to boot). Even McDonalds, although you’ll pay a nominal fee.

    Join the Hilton Honors Club if you’re not already a member and wander into their lobby to use their internet; I’ve done this at dozens of locations nationwide and they have always been willing to hand over the password for online access.

    Indeed, almost every hotel in America now has free wifi, and few will object to someone wandering in and using their internet in the lobby for a while (ask the desk clerk first). You can probably even mooch some coffee from them in most cases.

    Even rest areas (if you are traveling) in some states now have wifi. I know that Iowa and Nebraska do; many others will probably be following suit in the near future.

    By an inexpensive signal detector and you may find that you can even pick up someone else’s signal in your back yard. In some states, theft of internet service is actually a crime, but one which is seldom enforced.

    In short, unless you live in a really remote or backwards area (e.g., most of Ohio), you shouldn’t have much trouble logging on while you wait for your service to be restored.

  14. Boy, I hope Scalzi doesn’t miss the brief window in which we will all be signing up to receive Jetsons-style flying cars.

  15. Also, since someone snarked about it, I do in fact have the ability to moderate comment threads here via e-mail. So don’t think the Mallet of Loving Correction won’t fit through my BlackBerry.

    (sighs and puts away troll-laden manifesto which blames white childfree confederate-revisionist gay married christian activist judges with guns for the fact that your favorite sci-fi author isn’t more productive)

  16. Weenie. Between the Blackberry and your little netbook, you could stay in touch and do your work. But you don’t want to be seen writing and working in a coffee shop… though I can’t fathom why not.

    Dr. Phil

  17. Hope your ISP does what it sez it’s going to do. Several times in the last year I’ve gotten messages with instructions to do a a hard reboot to the modem on a certain day to upgrade the little blue box’s programming …only to come home and find out the upgrade can’t handle something and I can’t connect to the DSL. So I have to call support and bitch.

    anyhow, good luck with that.

  18. So what’s wrong with spending more time at your local library? Think what a thrill it must be for them when you stop by. Well, i’d be thrilled if it happened at my library anyway. And we have wi-fi too! Why don’t you come to Frankston to do your computing? It’s only on the other side of the planet….

    btw, also loved Zoes Tale. Good luck with the Hugo.

  19. You might want to think about purchasing Tetherberry since you have a Blackberry. Tetherberry lets you connect to the internet through your Blackberry. It’s handy if you travel and don’t want to pay for internet service in hotels or airports (of for those occasions when your modem dies). The connection speeds are surprisingly good.

  20. You may know this – and, certainly, your DSL provider should have told you – but most high-speed ISP’s also have dial-up.

    … I’m just sayin’…

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