May Appearance Reminders

May is going to be a busy month for me in terms of appearances, and then I hide in a hole until the last weekend of July. So if you’re gonna stalk me, May’s your month. Here’s where and when:

May 1 – 3: Penguicon 7.0. I’ll be a “nifty guest” here, which is like an auxiliary GoH; should a GoH fall ill or die, possibly by being pushed from a great height into the liquid nitrogen ice cream maker, one of the nifty guests will fill in. Or something. Wil Wheaton is one of the GoHs this year, and I expect he and I will have lots of crazy, rambunctious fun! If he’s lifted that restraining order from me, that is. No, I don’t want to talk about it. Except to say I thought he would enjoy that badger.

May 8-9: Ohioana Book Festival. Featured Author. Being a “featured author” here means I’ll be doing a library appearance on the 8th, and then a panel and either a reading or a Q&A on the 9th. Plus signing tons of books and generally being available to say “hi” to folks. Ohio folks, the Ohioana Book Festival is free and will have dozens of writers on hand, and you don’t have anything else planned for that weekend. I know, I checked your calendars. Yes, I broke into your house to do it. But that’s not the point. The point is, come down and say hello.

May 22 – 24: ConQuesT 40. I’m the author Guest of Honor. I will be showered in rose petals! Fed KC barbeque at the snap of my fingers! Throw out the first pitch at the Royals game and then be asked to stay on the mound for the next nine innings! Oh, the fun that will be had! By me! Everyone else will have to work. For me. But that’s not my problem, is it? Indeed not. Quite the opposite, in fact.

Related to this, a note from the ConQuest folks, which popped into my mailbox this morning: “You may wish to remind your readers that the next price increase for ConQuest is coming up of Friday. Also, the room block will be released on May 5, 2009.” So if you want the early-bird discount and get the convention room rate, you should book soon. Please book, won’t you? I don’t want to eat my barbeque all alone. Well, all alone, not counting my many minions.

That’s my May, publicly speaking.

35 Comments on “May Appearance Reminders”

  1. I’ll be a “nifty guest” here, which is like an auxiliary GoH; should a GoH fall ill or die, possibly by being pushed from a great height into the liquid nitrogen ice cream maker, one of the nifty guests will fill in.

    Well, Spider Robinson was a Guest of Honor until his wife fell ill recently. I see that Wil Wheaton has been promoted to the position, while you’re still merely “Nifty.”

    Nerd fight, let’s see it!

  2. Sorry for being off topic
    Where do we look for hints about “Weaponize the Muffin?”

    Sounds like you’re in for a hectic/fun May, Scalzipalooza?
    I don’t know if my code of honor would allow me to buy the T shirt without attending.

  3. When you say you thought Wheaton would “enjoy that badger”… No, on second thought I don’t want to know.

  4. OT: It took me several tries to parse your name, BigoldGeek, as Big Old Geek. I didn’t know what a Gold Geek might be, which is why I kept trying.

  5. Somebody needs to update their biography of you, John.

    Consulting with our even more clogged calendar (apparently you checked the April page on my, cause my May is solid) but we’ll try to find a way to Columbus.

  6. Yes, hugh57, that’s what I was trying to subtly imply. I know what ‘Bi’ means, actually, and I’ve met bi geeks, but Gold? Is a gpld geek what we used to call an Alpha Geek? If so, I’m at best a brass geek.

  7. Throw out the first pitch at the Royals game and then be asked to stay on the mound for the next nine innings!

    Given the Royals bullpen, this may not be as far-fetched as it first sounds….

  8. I’ve been in a blue funk all day (family tiff), and your ‘badger’ comment gave me the first good belly laugh I’ve had since I got up this morning.

    God bless you, John Scalzi.

  9. Tell someone to invite you to New England. Ohio was settled by a lot of New Englanders, particularly folks from Connecticut. You’ll feel right at home. Note: No Amish but we do have Shakers. All four of them would be happy to see you.

  10. The Royals are actually (so far) playing .500 baseball, so they may not want you to pitch. OTOH, The Yankees recently used OF/DH Nick Swisher to pitch in a blowout, and the Marlins used OF Cody Ross to do the same, so keep your hopes up!

  11. So John,
    How does one move from minion to sidekick?
    Not that I’m even a minion per se, but was wondering if there was some progression that I could check off on a list or something.
    I used to live in KC many moons ago and love the BBQ joints down there. 8D

  12. I am now even more jealous of my Dude, whom I was supposed to accompany to Penguicon this weekend. A movie he’s in is screening there, and he and the director/writer/fellow actor are road-tripping it. Go see Thac0: the Movie if you’ve got a spare hour — it’s side-splitting!

  13. There’s a chance I’ll be at the Ohio Book Fest on the 9th (my sis is a volunteer) so I might see ya there.

  14. I look forward to seeing you at ConQuesT.

    Menu planning advisory: Jack Stack has lamb BBQ. Yum.
    Then there’s Sheridan’s Frozen Custard for dessert.

  15. Jeff #18.
    Minion to sidekick is a big jump. The usual progression is minion, lickspittle, toady, lackey, underling, sychophant, and then sidekick. There are sub-classifications, for example: Junior Toady, Lieutenant Underling, Assistant-to-Minion (you really don’t want to be this one), but these are mere details.

    AlanM – 3rd Degree Lickspittle

  16. Thanks AlanM,

    I was hoping to skip toady and maybe lackey, I could do underling but from what I’ve seen in politics, one could make a whole career out of Sycophant. 8D

  17. Well, it’s not written down on the calendar, but I’m way behind on the novel critiques. But thanks for checking up. I thought the hair I left over the door cracks was disturbed and replaced in the wrong position.

  18. GOLD is a geek acronym for Graduate Of the Last Decade, so I bi GOLD Geek is a young binary using geek.

    I’m just an old Geek.

  19. Was the badger stuffed? Wait, was it stuffed and then coated in black velvet?! Wait… was it alive and covered in black velvet? Dude… harsh.

    /wishes she could go to Penguicon
    //hopes everyone has a good time
    ///realizes she’s not on Fark but likes slashies just the same

  20. Please warn the ConQuest concom that rose petals WILL stain the carpet (we learned that one the hard way at Westercon 52…)

  21. I’ve seen Wil twice at PAX, but I haven’t seen you yet. I’m so going to Ohioana.

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