25 Geeks NOT to Follow on Twitter
Posted on May 15, 2009 Posted by John Scalzi 54 Comments
Since I was on the list of the 100 geeks to follow on Twitter, I thought it would be appropriate to give a little attention to the other side of that particular equation.
The 25 Geeks NOT to Follow on Twitter
Note that at the time of this entry went up, none of these were actual Twitter accounts. We’ll see how long that lasts.
I dunno. I’d follow @MomSezImSocialized.
Just for the giggles ;-)
Oh and, on the butter thing? What did you decide?
Some of those could form the basis of a really amusing twitterfiction project.
If I wasn’t a lazy bastard, I’d start the sad, sad story of miss @PolyDesperate in tweet form.
I’m impressed. How the heck do you even FIND a list like that?
And here I thought for sure I’d make this list.
And I’d totally follow @SpksOnlyElvish
@Theresa: Um …
Nope, there just isn’t any polite way to do it. Going away now.
Hint: Our host is a writer. Of fiction….
Oh, come on! #17 and #19 might be fun to have at parties, and #21 just needs some encouragement to return to the land of the living.
funny, I thought I was following @SpksOnlyElvish. Maybe they spelled it differently? And in Tengwar characters?
Unfortunately, MomSezImSocialized is too long for twitter.
I bet that list will no longer be accurate by tomorrow, especially if they’re taken up by mostly your followers.
@AynRandBoyToy may not exist, but @johngaltlives does!
I can see some Irish person going for @BathingInMayo. That’s not an ethnic slur, it’s because Mayo is the name of a county in Ireland. See http://www.mayo.ie if you don’t believe me!
I have to say I was actually surprised “BobaFart” had not been taken. Seems like one that should have been.
I was going to use “LubeDude,” but that was taken.
Okay, I’m going to show my age here. Is “twitterfiction” a real thing? If not, I could see how a clever writer could produce an interesting story to be delivered in “real time” over twitter. Is anybody doing that? I’ve never actually used twitter myself.
Johnny@14: It is either a real thing, or I just invented it and can take credit when someone less lazy actually does it.
Kai@10: If it weren’t for the misspelling, it would sound like an Iain Banks ship name.
Thought I’d see something like @EatsWholeStksOvButter considering recent posts…
Someone who truly speaks “Elvish” would specify whether it was Quenya or Sindarin.
Not that I would know anything about this…
I am now BobaFart. I couldn’t be more proud.
Note: BobaFart becomes the first account on the list to get taken by a real person.
ETA: Chris typed that as I was typing this.
Scalzi, I thought we agreed that you would use your powers only for good?
Apparently I was misinformed.
BobaFart is now loose in the twitterverse, and the rest are sure to follow like the evil Golden Army. You’ve opened a gateway into a dimension of evilness that cannot be closed.
I hope you’re happy.
You know I am!
I am pretty sure I used to work with @AynRandBoyToy.
Too bad @ItRubsTheLotionOnItsSkin is too long.
I am admitting now here in front of the Whatever universe that I don’t get the attraction of twittering although I do see the humor in the list of names. Not earning my geek cred today.
I guess that means…
I’m now officially an old fart ready to tell kids to stay the hell off my lawn. I do have an AARP card.
waving my cane in the air… 8 P
@MuggleMugger has shades of SnapeSnogger all over it. Alliterative Harry Potter names are bad news.
Twitterfiction: @Wendell_Howe is a fictitious time traveller who is tweeting from 1877 San Francisco presently. @thaumatrope is an edited publication – many tweets are stand-alone stories, and there are some serials. And @readmybook is posting his entire unpublished SF novel, a few tweets at a time. There have also been mass fiction events, some of which used the tag #tfe (for twitter fiction event).
Well you could always make up a T-shirt for CafePress or whatnot of “AynRandBoyToy” caption and the jacket picture of Scalzi from his novels ;) castigation ummm maybe
/evil mode off/
Good Gravy, Vulture, don’t encourage him.
Remember, in addition to creating the porcine/feline hybrid and unleashing the above named evil army of evil upon the world, Scalzi is the guy who once commissioned a velvet Wesley.
An AynRandBoyToy T-shirt would only make him laugh manically, order a lot of a hundred, and hand them out to Cosplay furries at the next Worldcon. The man is nefarious.
Which, of course, explains his general appeal.
20. Jim Wright – I know you know John better than we do, and even *I* know he uses his powers for much more than good – he uses them for FUN!
And, according to Arthur Bach, “Fun is the most important thing to have!”
ooh, ooh, ooh – Mister Wright – I want an AynRandBoyToy T Shirt for my very own!
I figured that it was going to be a joke when I read the heading of the blog but I was still relieved to not see my name ;)
BeVibe, I don’t don’t know Scalzi at all – the man is a cipher to me. An evil, evil cipher.
JimWright, I know about those! I got one on the back of a box of breakfast cereal, but I acidentally ate the decoder ring. It was an evil cipher, indeed.
@MyEyesYrBoobs has been following me for years.
@ BrentSpiner recently finished tweeting a sort of noir/mystery thing that started with him waking up in the asylum. Quite fun.
I’m still getting pestering emails from the “Klingon” I used to know now going by @StillLivesInMomsBasement.
How he jumped from still using a 486 to skipping Facebook for Twitter is confusing.
Regarding Twitterfiction, another example is Jeph Jacques of Questionable Content, who has created profiles for most of his major characters where he has them interact. And if you check it out from work, do NOT open any of Pintsize’s links.
I was working on some more Twitterers NOT to Follow myself, like @heckraiser and @cannibalrights, when I started thinking about Scalzi’s book titles.
@agenttothestars is a suspended account (John, have you been taunting Twitter?) so I started with some variations for SCALZI SOCKPUPPETS NOT TO FOLLOW ON TWITTER.
“And if you check it out from work, do NOT open any of Pintsize’s links.”
Oh God, you didn’t….?
Now, I COULD have done @oldmanswhore…
Othar Tryggvassen (@othar) from Girl Genius (http://www.girlgenius.net) is another #twitterfiction
My favourite is @Cats6Catbox0.
I prefer a 1:1 ratio myself.
One more: @scarzi (and his brothers @duelingscarzi and @appendixscarzi)
Don’t forget @stickofbutter.
If I were more creative, I’d go grab that one and start tweeting it. (Thereby, again, confirming Stross’s assertion that ideas are easy, it’s the execution that’s hard.)
By the way, does anyone know if John Scalvi has a twitter account?
oneswellfoop@39: If they ever make a movie of “Old Man’s War”, that’ll be the porno “parody”.
I am now following BobaFart. Make it good, bounty boy.
How would “2girls1tweet” even work, anyway? (Bear in mind that I haven’t actually seen the related shock image, and would like to remain blissfully ignorant.)
Unsure what is wrong with this. I find it quite enjoyable, actually. And the dog enjoys cleaning me up afterwards.
Fletcher, I’m not sure how you fend off curiosity, knowing how it is rumored to be one of the most disturbing things ever (rightfully so), but kudos to you. I was caught unawares when I was “made” to see it.
And I have no idea how it would work on Twitter. I’m just glad it’s not there! lol.
If I were to do a @2girls1tweet, I would parody two teenage girls sharing the account, blissfully unaware of the infamous source.
Without a doubt you have touched upon the pulse of our fractured nation…
Genius, Scalzi!!! Terrifying, though, the news that LubeDude is taken. Ick.
Fletcher@46: I was sandbagged into watching that and was violently ill the rest of the night. I clicked it off just as the worst of it began (about 15 seconds in).
But it’s truly comic effects became apparent on FAMILY GUY when Brian made Stewie watch it. I’m not sure what was funnier: Stewie’s eye-bulging reaction to what he was seeing or Brian laughing at him.
Gotta give this one to the dog.
LubeDude probably runs an auto shop. Yeah, that’s what I’m going to assume.
Sihaya – I know a guy who opened his E-mail account as “MrHanger” (he manufactures and sells pipe hangers). He had to loose it after all of the gay porn started showing up in his mailbox.