Oh Noes! It’s The Infopocalypse!

Seriously now, is it just me or are Google, Twitter and Facebook either down or moving incredibly slowly? Is it the end of the world as we know it? And will be stalking our neighbors for their protein value? Someone let me know, please. Because I’ll need to track down some of the more free range neighbors.

40 Comments on “Oh Noes! It’s The Infopocalypse!”

  1. I’ve been having trouble with twitter all day, but gmail, google reader and facebook all seem okay. So maybe it’s only 2/3rds you?

  2. Surfing the interwebs isn’t “real work” Aside from that I would bet on your ISP. Google seems fine here.
    Huh, went back to the Whatever in another window and the posts after The Big Idea are mia.

  3. Of course, since Neil Gaiman announced he’s going off the grid for the next week, the internet might as well shut down until he gets back. These people and their “vacations” and “privacy.” *sniff*

  4. Maybe it’s you?

    Or more seriously, maybe it’s your internet connection. If you want to check, run a traceroute to Google and to cnn.com; if any of the individual hops (given where you live) are more than about 200msec, something’s network.screwy.

  5. I reckon the “free range” neighbors are more likely to be able to run away faster.

    In other words, it’s the sedentary neighbors who will provide the more favorable calories returned per calories burned ratio.

  6. I like how this post comes right after the “Okay I’m srsly gonna go get some work done now I mean it” post.

  7. Google is fine. Who cares if Facebook or Twitter are down? Or, for that matter, have melted in to a radioctive puddle of their own suckage and burned their way to the center of the earth.

  8. Wouldn’t it have been smarter to have hunted down some of those county-fair attending neighbors? The deep-fried Twinkies have got to make them sticky and therefore easier to catch.

  9. Heck, gunt down the ones who placed ahead Athena. Revenge! A dish best served cold — with cookies!

  10. They seemed nice enough kids. And I think that it would set a bad example for Athena. Not every problem can be solved by brutally murdering everyone who bests you in a baking contest. Indeed, very few problems are actually solved that way.

  11. Twitter is collapsing under the weight of its own hype.

    Google is slow because too many people are Googling the Twitter hype collapse.

    Facebook’s been weird for about two weeks lately.

    As for protein value, anyone who wrote a quiz who won’t let you see results until you send it to 20 people should be hunted for protein value.

    And no, I don’t want to grok them. I just think that, after that bit of asshattery, I should be allowed to extract a pound of flesh. That I’m using that pound for cold cuts is irrelevant.

  12. #24 @eviljwinter You can always skip that step to send it to “friends” but it’s usually in smaller type and you have to hunt a bit for it.

    Though, I think the mere thought of the intarwebs collapsing has turned the Whatever site completely white!

  13. John @22: I remember a line in a book I recently read. A character said something like: “This is one of the few problems I’ve run into that cannot be solved by violence.”

    I wish I could remember the name of the book. Sigh.

  14. I thought I was the only person having problems with facebook and such. Glad to know that I am not alone.

    As for those free range neighbors, well……Good Luck

  15. I have been trying like crazy to delete (hehe) my online presences today in an insane effort to streamline my internet energy expenditure.

    Things were a bit slow when I tried to delete a wordpress blog and the wordpress.com pretty much said I was making a BIG mistake in leaving the WordPresser movement. Blogger was a bit better (more responsive) when I deleted my blog there and that’s why I decided to use blogger for my new blog.

    Don’t think it was the internet as a whole… more like that these huge blogging platforms acting like needy dumpees.

  16. And by “internet energy expenditure” I’m referring to the time and energy I spend on the internets (be it the various blogs I kept up to date or the ones I read, etc.) and NOT Al Gore’s crusade…although, as a side effect, that too shall decline :)

  17. According to Six (AKA, Livejournal) they’ve been dealing with a rather concerted DDOS attack–as have many networking/blogging sites. Dunno if that’s true as I’ve not seen much reporting on it and you’d think people would be up in arms over someone disturbing their tweets, but it does jive with what I’ve seen across the board. And Six also offered recompense to it’s paid members due to the issue, which tells me something’s up (though it might just be smoke and mirrors).

  18. #22: Are you sure? I thought that was the alternate ending to Zoe’s tale, after the big “Obin Chef” competition. Allez cuisine!

  19. Er…without Google, Facebook and Twitter, exactly how are we going to stalk our neighbors?

  20. I have some good Soylent Green recipes if you need them. My fav is a chinese-style fried rice…

    4oz Soylent Green(tm), drained
    2 eggs
    4-1/2 tsp oil
    1 tbsp minced garlic
    1tbsp minced fresh ginger
    1/2 tsp red pepper flakes
    2 cups thinly sliced Chinese cabbage
    1 cup chopped carrots
    3 cups cooked white rice
    1/4 cup canned chicken broth
    1/4 cup reduced-sodium soy sauce

    You can substitute tofu for a few weeks while you are waiting for the Soylent to cure and set up.

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