Reminder: I’m in Toronto on Friday

If you are in or around the area of Toronto, this is a reminder that I will be amongst you on Friday, because I am doing an appearance at the Merril Collection of the Toronto Public Library. More specifically, I will be appearing at 7:00 P.M. in the Merril Collection reading room, 3rd floor, 239 College Street, Lillian Smith Branch of the Toronto Public Library.

And what will I be doing when I appear? Oh, you know. Some singing, some dancing, and hosting special guest appearances by M*A*S*H’s Gary Burghoff, Shields and Yarnell, and, of course, Charo. Between us we will re-enact the Star Wars Christmas Special in its entirety! Or, in the event of cancellation by my special guests, I suppose I’ll maybe I’ll do my usual thing of standing up there and blathering on until people tell me to shut up and just sign their books, which is why people came out in the first place. Either way it should be fun.

So come on out and see me. Attendance is free but seats will fill up fast, so get there early. Remember that the first three rows of seats will get wet! So bring a tarp (note: you will not need to bring a tarp (note: he’s lying, you totally will (note: shut up, man, I’m not Gallagher (note: No, but you, like, spit a lot when you talk (note: I do not (note: he totally does (note: I will now strangle you (note: *choke*))))))))

See you there.

37 Comments on “Reminder: I’m in Toronto on Friday”

  1. Did you just choke yourself out? Does that mean you’re now dead and therefore not going to Toronto? I’m no where near there so the Toronto thing doesn’t bug me. But if you have, in fact, choked yourself to death I shall miss your fine ramblings on the intarwebz.

  2. Naturally, I won’t be arriving in Toronto until Saturday… *shrug* then again, family obligations take up the whole weekend anyway. (Though one wonders why it takes so long to wash the sin out of a 1-year-old; I think those priests need to invite a time-motion analyst to figure out where all that wasted effort is going in their baptismal rites.)

    — Steve

  3. Well, darn! Leaving for the Caribbean that morning.

    But then again, I *do* have cancellation insurance…

  4. Scalzi, please ask your wife where the medication is. I think maybe you forgot it this morning.
    Don’t worry about the weird voices, just ignore them. And once you take the medication it will all be better.
    Also, the cats aren’t talking to Charo and Kodi is not Gary Burghoff.

  5. Gah! Now I must select which books of yours I want to get signed. Bringing the entire stack may be unwieldy, will surely irritate people in line behind me, and might possibly give you a hand cramp. At least I got a bit of a head start at Worldcon….

  6. Don’t be surprised if if tons of people show up and are pissed because Radar isn’t there.

    Back in the ’80’s someone at the LSU SF club jokingly added a list of attendees including Anne Rice, it was just believable enough for the biggest turnout ever. Not very happy people though.

  7. Is this the production with Burghoff as Chewbacca or the one with Charo as Princess Leia?

  8. I take it seating will be first come, first served?

    BTW, that particular branch is a very nice building (street view has a good shot of it). It even has a small park out back.

  9. Shields and Yarnell? Only a truly evil man commits Mimes upon this poor suffering world.
    (Can you believe that Mimes were once allowed to have weekly TV programming. What evils the 70s visited upon us.)

  10. I was going to ask if anyone was anal enough (besides me) to count the parenthesisseseses but I see that crayonbaby bet me to it.

    BTW crayonbaby. There are the 8 opening and 8 closing. Looks fine to me.

  11. Hey I went to see Gallager once years and years ago. We were in row L and still got wet, so be warned

  12. Dagnabbit, John, I won’t be in TO until Saturday. Although my fiancee lives in the area, and has my copy of The God Engines. Maybe I can talk her into taking the day off from work.

    Also, at the risk of invoking your ire (because we’ve all seen those little flecks of foam that form at the corners of your mouth when the topic comes up), will you sign my e-book reader?

  13. Whoa — I’d forgotten you were coming here!

    I’ll be there with bells on. And clothes. Clothes, for sure.

  14. If Gary Burghoff and Charo aren’t available for the Star Wars reenactment, perhaps you should try for Donny and Marie Osmond – their career arc probably has left them with a number of openings now… as a plus, they have experience with Star Wars musical numbers:

  15. DavidK:

    The irony there is that Donny and Marie were brother and sister. JUST LIKE LUKE AND LEIA.


    I have no idea what rules there will be on that, actually. My assumption is bring no more than three.

  16. John Scalzi said: DavidK: The irony there is that Donny and Marie were brother and sister. JUST LIKE LUKE AND LEIA.

    This was done before ‘Empire Strikes Back’. Gotta wonder if George Lucas saw this, and thought “Hmm… Luke and Leia as brother and sister – now there’s an interesting plot twist.”

  17. Parentheses:I counted them all too, but in my defense, the first programming language I learned in college was LISP, so it’s almost a reflex.

  18. Could I convince you to travel an hour southwest to wee ol’ Kitchener-Waterloo… Heck I’ll even buy you dinner!!

    I travel to Toronto once a month and won’t be going until Friday May 7th… and unless I call in sick spend the $26 for bus to Toronto I will miss you :(

    So dinner on me??

  19. John,

    Great you are visiting Canada. Next time come to Vancouver. It is a beautiful city, esp now the Olympics are over!!!! And I have a stack of books for you to sign. I will remember the first three rows rule – just in case….

    And I refuse to be a typical Canadian and slag Toronto!!! (Sort of like most Americans slag NYC!).



  20. It’s nice to see that people visit Toronto, though I will be chronically 45 minutes east. :(

  21. Damn, I’ll be stuck just 2 hours down the 401 in London… I’ll try to send Wayfare with my copy of OMW for signing.

    Remember, if you ask for a double-double here, you get a coffee.

  22. I might just be able to make it.

    Any homework in preparation of your visit to “trawna”.


  23. If (as is probably unlikely, given your usual schedule) you take Penny up on that side-trip invitation to visit K-W, PLEASE let me know, I’d love to say hello. No books to sign, I promise … I much prefer mm paperback versions, to save space, but those I have of yours were all bought new from Amazon, not secondhand.

  24. The sad thing is I have been planning this since you mentioned it in Oct!!!!!! Time for me to get a life I guess. BTW last month Joe Hill was at the same spot and recommended we all come back for your reading.
    Making the 2 hour jaunt from Belleville…

  25. Shields and Yarnell? I don’t say this often, but some classes of beings deserve to be inhumanely destroyed…….

  26. Squee! My favourite author at my favourite library (yes, I have a favourite library). I will try my best not to go all fan-girl.

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