Dear Germany:
I love you guys. You are my bestselling market outside of the United States and you’ve given me awards — but even before then I’ve always had an interest in you. Did you know I took seven years of German in high school and college? It’s true, I did. Yes I was terrible at it, and even now I speak German roughly as well as I juggle flaming chainsaws, which is to say not at all. But that’s my fault, not yours.
Heck, I even once applied to spend a year as an exchange student in Germany, and made it to the final round, only to be knocked out of contention because I was one-tenth of a grade point under the person who got the last slot. And, really, Germany, what has that person ever done for you? Nothing. Seriously, I think they got lost in the Schwarzwald while they were there and were consumed by bears. I’m pretty sure that’s what happened. I think I read about it one time. The point is, they never appreciated you like I appreciated you. And they certainly didn’t write you novels, like I did. Full of love. And also spaceships and lasers.
So, yes: Forces have conspired to keep us apart. But no longer. For this October, Germany, I am coming to you. Yes! The United States State Department and Heyne (my German publisher) are teaming up to bring me across the oceans and many time zones and several languages to bring me to you in a multi-city tour. So far, here are the cities in which I am confirmed:
Frankfurt
Saarbrücken
Stuttgart
Tübingen
Freiburg
Munich
And possibly one more city to come. More details, including dates and places, are coming in the future.
Those of you looking at these cities and thinking to yourself “Frankfurt? In October? Will he be at the Book Fair?” The answer is: Yes! I will be there, and other places as well. And from there I’ll be off through your fair land, riding trains and giving readings. It’s all very well timed, since Der Wilde Planet, the German version of Fuzzy Nation, will be released there in September.
So prepare yourself, Germany! For I am coming. And, oh, the fun we shall have.
See you soon,
John Scalzi