The Cats, Displeased With the State of Their Food Bowls, Warm Up Their LASER EYEBALLS

But then they remembered that vaporizing me would still not give them opposable thumbs. Score one for the primates! And yes, I then fed them. Because I am not stupid.

46 Comments on “The Cats, Displeased With the State of Their Food Bowls, Warm Up Their LASER EYEBALLS”

  1. That my friend, is exactly when I treat the animals with Tuna, fish, or whatever special animal treat I might have on hand.

  2. This is a familiar sight. First I feed the two outdoor cats, then the three indoor cats — under threat of death for failure to produce the kitty kibble.

  3. That’s a pretty Ragdoll you’ve got there. Would be a shame if he had to eat your brains.

  4. I think they are the same color. The blue one indicates it is not yet at full power.

  5. O Great Scalzi, what an excellent picture of Her Most Glorious Shimmering Radiant Perfection and Her Most Senior and Trusted Minions, Mighty Lopsided Cat and TempCat Zeus.

    Amazingly well done, in fact. The Beauteous Ghlaghghee is in the correct centered and leading position, flanked by Mighty He to Her Right and then properly trailed by the Lesser He.

    You see how easy that is? You didn’t even have to arrange this image of Superbness. You just had to take it.

    So easy even a Blacklisted and Disapproved Scalzi can do it.

    The Official Ghlaghghee Fan Club

    PS – We know the Seal of Disapproval Award weighed heavily on you and these pictures are your desperate attempts to atone for your faults. The Executive Committee is keeping a close and approving eye on your actions and will soon be in a mood to reward you.

    PPS – But lay off on the inane caption commentary, will you? It’s pretty much wrong all the way through. Leave the analysis to the experts of the Executive Committee.

  6. I used to just leave food out for my cats. They are smarter than dogs about food and seem to know when to stop. If you always do it, then they won’t see it as that big of a deal and just eat when they are hungry.

  7. I can’t leave food out all the time for the cats or the dog will eat it.

    Just wait’ll you have grandkids.

  8. Am I the only one here who clicks on the cat pictures to to see what Chang who is not Chang has to say? 8)

  9. It’s the Midwich Kitties, man. Crap, not original.

    Zeus: Hey guys, what do you think, Lops will hock a hairball in his shoe?

    Lops: Nah he’s already cranky due to the lack of Zero. Lets just stare at him menacingly. GLARES

  10. We have a small room set up just for the cats. It’s got one of those gravity feeders full of cat food, their own water, and a big kitty litter box. And then we put a dog gate in the doorway, so the cats can jump over and get in and out, but the dogs can’t. Simplifies the life a little bit. Plus, we don’t have cats waking us up in the morning just to feed them, which is nice.

    Also, three cats? Who is who again?

  11. where “dog gate” is one of those kids gates from Toys R Us advertised as a way to keep the kids from falling down your stairs.

  12. Ah yes, the kitteh death stare…

    We also use a child gate to keep out grandmooses (my son’s shephard mix puppies) away from the cat food. Works wonderfully to prevent an interspecies conflagration: 4 cats vs 2 very large, but silly dogs.

  13. #20: When Caitlin, my ragdoll, was younger, I had one of those perpetual feeder things set up. Very handy indeed! Unfortunately, now that she’s diabetic, I have to feed her special canned food, so the cost of feeding three cats went up from $7/mo to around $400/mo (no kidding). And that also means I can rarely sleep in anymore–Simba usually wakes me up screaming to be fed.

    At one point I tried using one of those quart-sized perpetual watering things, but Caitlin never could figure out what it was–she kept hooking her paw through the handle and tipping it over.

  14. Oh–and I hope you don’t mind, John, but that lovely picture is now my desktop background.


  15. And yes, I then fed them. Because I am not stupid.

    Meaning you recognize that YOU are their alternate food source.

  16. @Greg I have gates with swing-out doors in the bottom so that the cats can move in and out without the necessity of jumping (which unnecessarily excites the canid).

  17. @merbrat #9 Congratulations, you are a winner! Please contact us to arrange delivery of your Internets.

  18. All three of them with laser eyes, at the same time. Yeah, they looked deprived of food. You are doomed. Mine just try to trip me when they’re hungry. Or I get pitiful cries of anguish.

  19. Love those Bowie eyes on Ghlaghghee (the dichromatism, rather than the frozen pupil).

  20. They must not have been that hungry. After all, they graciously allowed you to take their picture _before_ dealing with the empty bowl crisis.

  21. After listening to an hour of impending disaster news from further nuclear activity in Japan, this was a delightful rescue from a joyless day! Great picture!

    A corner of my desk is now devoted to a bowl of dry cat food because it’s the only place the dog can’t get it and it probably saves me from being threatened by the feline members of my family.

  22. I can almost hear the cats chanting, “One of Us, One of Us.” -whisper-is he going towards the canopener? Say it again,Louder, males.-
    I hope you have some frozen Lobster in the fridge if they lose patience with you.

  23. Kitty mind powers….activate!

    I think I need more coffee (or an eye exam), because I read Tim’s comment (#41) as “frozen Labrador” instead of “Lobster”, and thought, “well, you never know what you’ll find in the freezer….”

  24. I’d call it the kitty mind meld but they look way too aggressive for that. I have a terrier who has
    perfected the mind meld but he doesn’t get that I often say NO to the 3rd bowl of kibble.

    Great photo…whatever Chang/NotChang says.
    Oh…the Fan Club digs it? Huh, we have an accord?
    Cue the Kittehs of the Apocalypse.
    Hmn, maybe these ARE the Kittehs of the Apocalypse.
    Backing away now….

  25. #17, Sadly I am a follower of Chang who is !Chang also. I just can’t help myself. And, it’s getting weirder out there.

  26. LOL! I’d make sure my bedroom door was securely closed that (and every) evening. =D

    I have a similar eye-glowing kitteh pic after we moved into a country house and had to hire an exterminator to rid the house and property of bird and cattle fleas…

    So after all that I thought my cats eyes were glowing from radioactive waste… or whatever was in that killer insecticide. =O

  27. Gotta love the Feline Overlords… :-)

    Our Moggie Horde-let (only three, plus the rotating collection of semi-feral Porch Cats) don’t do the Laser Eyeballs… They just take their cue from the “Simon’s Cat: Wake Up!” video, and copy everything there but the ear-snap and baseball bat… :-}

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