To The Commenter Currently Languishing in My Moderation Queue, and Soon to Be In My Trash Bin
When the first words of your comment are “Apologies for an off-topic comment, but…,” followed by a rather lengthy comment which is indeed entirely unrelated to the comment thread at hand, you are signaling two things:
1. That you are in fact not in the least sorry for your off-topic comment, just like someone who writes “not to be pedantic” is entirely happy to be pedantic, or the person who says “I’m not trying to offend you” is in fact trying very hard to do so;
2. That you may be a bit of an asshole, because what you’re really saying to everyone is “wow, let’s all turn away from the completely irrelevant discussion you’ve been having, and make it all about me and what I want to talk about.”
These two things being thus signaled, you should be glad that WordPress caught your act of unapologetic assholery and punted it into the moderation queue, because that way the only person who knows for sure what you are is me. And I’m not going to tell on you. Today. But if you do it again, I might! So that’s your friendly warning. I understand you may not have intended to be an unapologetic asshole, but of course, comparatively few of the people who are, do. Please keep this in mind.
For everyone else who might be tempted to post an off-topic comment, please, ask yourself: Is today the day you want to be revealed as an unapologetic asshole? If it is, then of course go right ahead, and delight in the recognition you have as such, until the time I get around to malleting the comment. If it’s not, then, please, I implore you, keep your off-topic comment to yourself, at least until such time as a comment thread that it is on-topic for becomes available, when you can post it there. And it will be admired! Because it is on topic. See how that works.