How I Know There’s Something Just a Little Bit Wrong With Me, #7,212
Posted on October 30, 2011 Posted by John Scalzi 43 Comments
This zombie? From The Walking Dead? Yeah, I think she’s a little bit hot. I mean, if one of the undead has to eat my brain? This one.
Don’t look at me like that. I said there was something a little bit wrong with me.
In the nineties it was vampires. Now it’s zombies. Why are zombies the popular rage now? Why do they eat brains? And how can they be the un-dead, or walking dead, if they respire, digest, and do all the stuff that living organisms do? I vote for aliens. Real aliens, not just humanoid monsters from space. Let’s move on already to the next great popular craze. Zombies have had their day in the sun, or is it night? She is a rather hot zombie, but no John, I rather keep my brains intact as they seem quite useful to have around.
I’m not saying I’d willingly give up my brains.
Just the other day, I was thinking that you can recognize the geeks because when they talk about “exotic skin tones” being sexy, they don’t necessarily mean shades of brown or freckles, but grey, blue, or green.
It’s the eyes, isn’t it?
That’s disgusting. Not the picture – stunning. But the fact you used the words “a little bit hot” anywhere near that thing. (shudder)
I’d say it was the point where you said there was something ‘a little bit wrong’ with you. There’s something a lot wrong, dear.
I think I’m with Gwen on this one!
Yeah, no little bit about it John.
Yeah, I see it. That tumble of recently-feral hair, that heart-shaped face with the mouth drawing into a perfectly symmetrical rictus sneer. Mmm.
Well, if your wife were to turn into a zombie, I think she’d probably look something like this.
I think Zaphod Beeblebrox summed it up best when he said, “Put your analyst on danger money, baby.”
“My surname is Li and my personal name is Kao, and there is a slight flaw in my character.”
Little bit? LOL
wow…and my wife thinks *I’m* crazy for finding Flo the Progressive lady hot
She looks better than some of the “ladies’ I see on my drive home from work. I’m right there with you John.
my wife thinks *I’m* crazy for finding Flo the Progressive lady hot.
You think you’ve got problems? I have it bad for Erin the esurance Special Agent.
God, I miss her….
Why are zombies the popular rage now?
Not meaning to blogwhore or anything, but…
I’d go for the Hare Krishna zombie in the original Dawn of the Dead because that’s the most amusing zombie I’ve ever seen and I want to be amused when my brains are being eaten. I’d rather not have my brains eaten, but if I had to – I’d vote for being amused while it happens.
As for why zombies are all the rage – a Danish newspaper had an article on that today. There’s no point in me linking to it (as it’s in Danish), but I can summarize it very quickly. It claimed that there is a connection between the fear of overpopulation and the popularity of zombies; the zombies are like the great, unstoppable masses and they’re different from us – like most of the population growth happens in countries which have cultures that are different from ours. Also – it deals with the fear of losing your individuality in the masses – as becoming a zombie would be the ultimate loss of your identity and individuality.
That doesn’t sound too wrong to me.
@Nikitta: In US politics, zombies are what liberals think of conservatives, and vampires are what conservatives think of liberals.
I like this explanation, for why zombies; http://penny-arcade.com/patv/episode/zombies
I guess the smart marketing money is on what’s the popular rage next? Before vampires, it was wizards (or at least Gandalf and Harry Potter). So what are the logical genre options for The Next Big Thing?
Werewolves (a bit tied up in the vampire thing, really)
Space Travel and/or Aliens (V bombed, though those were mostly evil aliens, and Firefly and SG:U were cancelled – but there is The Doctor going strong)
Robots and/or Virtual Reality (Caprica was cancelled, apparently; I don’t know if enough people were watching it to notice).
Cowboys (as long as we’re talking about mythical heroes)
Knights. Also Samurai. (see Cowboys)
Ninjas (Weren’t the 80s awesome? Also, see Cowboys, Knights, and Samurai)
Cthulhu (or preferably the Charles Stross Logic-Engine-Cthulhu variant, which cries out for film adaptation)
Sidhe (I don’t think this one’s really caught on in mass-market popular entertainment since the Victorian era)
Steampunk (Has steampunk ever really caught fire? On consideration, there’s been a fair bit of it – Brisco County, Junior, The League Of Execrable Gentlemen, Wild Will Smith, and the recent Musketeers – but somehow it doesn’t seem to be a mass-market film/TV genre).
I think it means that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you, especially since I’m pretty sure that that’s your wife with zombie makeup on B-)
The only thing that photo does for me is make me reach for a shotgun…
I just threw up a little in my mouth.
BTW, I’m so tired of zombies. For the last decade they’ve been the “cool” monster; yet they’re so mundane. All they do is eat brains, no creativity involved. Heck, no supernatural involved now since most are zombified due to a “virus” (or rotten milk). Give me a witch, demon or ghost since you never know how they’ll come at you in the scary movie/story they’re in. Plus with ghosts/demons/witches you have the added fear that the character(s) might actually just be insane.
In comparison zombies are just so boring.
It’s the eyes. You can get lost in them.
Yeah, you get lost, right up until she tears your jugular out with her teeth.
In view of the fact that you married this zombie, can’t see anything wrong with you. As I see it, you are partial to cheekbones – and perhaps less interested in, or more broad-minded about, what (if anything) is covering them.
I’ll third ‘it’s the eyes’.
…and the way her shoulder-length hair frames her face.
Yes. From the expression on her face, it’s obvious that she’s way into you, John. She wants you BAD.
In life this one was probably pretty hot, I’ll give you that.
“I guess the smart marketing money is on what’s the popular rage next?”
Well, I did see a shelf of teen mermaids books below the teen vampires and werewolves books when I was in a B&N the other day. But I didn’t look closely enough to see if this represented an actual, reader-driven trend that publishers were responding to, or just a coordinated line of books from a single publisher *hoping* to spark an actual trend.
I would so totally Double Tap that (but only in a Zombieland way).
I’ve never been a zombie fan and don’t care for the current vogue at all, but I do know my monsters. Yesterday on Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me, Peter Sagal said something about zombies’ “traditionally” eating brains, and I thought, “TRADITIONALLY, zombies aren’t discriminating.” I seem to recall, back in the day — when they took the farm house and Monroeville Mall — that zombies were in fact particularly fond of entrails.
Then I realized that I was wrong, too, and you know what, shotgun/machete/flame-thrower warriors? I decided that should the Zombie Apocalypse come, it’s going to be high-larious when the zombies turn out to be old school traditional: vacant, listless, servile, and the most danger any of you are in is from being bored to death. HAHAHAhahahAHHAHAHAHahhahah…
Actually the most danger we’re in is giving them the vote, as we did in 2008 and look what it got us: misery on a national scale. :)
Scorpius: Oh, hell, I’d put it back farther that that. Like 1980! :-D
Take her to the dentist, maybe put some sunglasses on her, get her a muzzle, and we’ll talk.
Zombies have been with ‘us’ longer than one might think…. http://www.bbc.co.uk/nature/15493634
I thought the Mary Jane zombie was hot
Maybe not right now, but you know, at last call …
Jeebus. ‘Nuff said.
John, you like buck teeth?!
Her eyes are WIERD! It looks like there’s no iris AT ALL. just this wide expanse of bloody egg colored eyeball with a teenytiny damn pupil in the center. Creepy Zombie Eyes are freakin’ Beaker out, man. Seriously.