A Promise to Twitter Fulfilled, or, How I Ended Up Covered in Frosting by Roller Derby Girls on Neil Gaiman’s Lawn
Posted on September 16, 2012 Posted by John Scalzi 71 Comments
First, the video, which explains why roller derby girls are covering me in frosting on Neil Gaiman’s lawn, and the subsequent photodocumentation. Stick around for the time-lapse photography!
Second, the image, which illustrates everything.
Three: The poster offer!
Yes, indeed, you can get this awesome picture as a poster, via NeverWear.net. When you buy it, 100% of the profits go to two worthy causes: The SFWA Emergency Medical Fund, which helps out science fiction and fantasy writers in times of medical crisis, and City Kitties, a non-profit going to help out the stray cat population of West Philadelphia. Kittehs and Writers! You can’t go wrong!
For those of you wondering if Neil himself was involved with the production, if you click through to the poster order page, you’ll see a picture of Neil preparing to plaster the last bit of frosting onto my face, right over my mouth. There’s symbolism there, I’m sure.
For more on this madness, check out photographer Kyle Cassidy’s post about it, and Kitty’s Neverwear post as well.
And what what is it actually like, being covered in frosting?
And that’s all I am going to say about that.
Seriously, though, this was ridiculous fun, and the idea of making a pilgrimage to Neil’s place to be covered in frosting by roller derby girls was just too awesome to pass up. My life is strange, but it’s the best kind of strange, i.e., the kind that’s really quite a lot of fun.
Now I have think up what I will do when I reach 40,000 Twitter followers. Hmmmmm.
(And yes, please feel free to blog, tweet and otherwise blab about this to everyone you know. We’re trying to save kittens and writers here. Through the mystical power of frosting.)
Update, 10:36pm: Our first delightful fan art, from Cameragrrl, taking off on a popular internet meme:
I can’t wait to use these in my arguments on the Internet!
I laughed hard.
I’d totally buy a T-shirt of this… Just sayin’…
Buy a poster!
There wasn’t nearly enough frosting involved. “Covered in frosting” must mean something entirely different in Ohio than it does in Chicagoland. ;)
You don’t know just how far down the frosting goes….
True enough, but the video certainly doesn’t indicate any on your shins. :D
Is it just me, or are you channeling Claude Rains in that poster?
I just realized that I watched a guy get covered in frosting by roller derby girls, on the internet, and it wasn’t porn.
Huh – and the only thing that came to mind was the cover of the Herb Alpert album “Whipped Cream and Other Delights” but with John instead of the woman.
Man, I wish I could “like” Laura’s comment, because, yeah.
I agree with N.K. Jemisin. Double plus good to both John for following through and Laura for the comment.
Now for 40,000 followers allow me to put forward a thought: Barbeque.
Thanks for the laugh, although you really didn’t have to try this hard… :-)
Seeing this the first thing I thought about was the Bond Girl death scene in “Goldfinger” where Jill Masterson was killed after Goldfinger covered her in gold. Does this make Neil the dastardly “Butterfinger”? And did he say “No, Mr. Scalzi, I expect you to die”?
Neil Gaiman is the guy that adopted the two white German Shepherds, right? I remembered when I saw one of them in the sped up video. Her name’s Lola, right?
I heard about him. Seems like a pretty cool guy.
You say it isn’t porn, but given this and his reference to frosting eating with his hands at the Hugos, I’m starting to wonder exactly what sort of a frosting fixation this IS…
The frosting comment at the Hugos was a direct reference to this, actually. Consider it foreshadowing.
Nash the Slash is laughing at you…
…your LIFE as a literary element. I like it.
Loved the video! Can’t wait to get a poster! But I was curious who chose the music by Damon Buxton. It was amazing and I am buying an album of his music right now based on the video and the stuff on his website. Did you pIck the music? I ask because it seems a bit different than what you normally post on your site.
Should’ve jumped on his trampoline too! Start a whole set of author’s on Neil Gaiman’s trampoline meme.
Wow…as someone who voluntarily gets hit with pies on occasion, I’ve gotta say, this is pretty out there! Whipped cream I like, but frosting? That’s hardcore.
And no cats were involved. I’m sure Ghlaghghee is laughing in the corner.
Will have to see about poster. That is awesome, as are the causes.
Neil has an interesting idea of entertainment while Amanda is out of town, doesn’t he?
I am really glad that the jacket worked out. When Kyle asked me to help him find an outfit that looks like Claude Rains’, on a budget of like ten bucks, in West Philly, and also I had to guesstimate your size, I feared the worst.
Next project: Sarah Pinborough in Nutella.
I just tried to explain this to my wife. I’m not very good at “explaining things”, especially something like this. She was… mostly confused. Then I told her Neil Gaiman, rollergirls, and good causes were involved, and she said “oh, ok”. Then she said “I’m going to bed to read my book.”
Her current book is… wait for it… Redshirts.
She’s really enjoying it, btw.
Ahahaahaha! This made my weekend. The goggles rule, by the way. And yes, I’m going to second on “liking” Laura’s comment. :)
I like that one of Neil’s dogs was on the scene at the end, snarfing up bits of frosting off the lawn.
I did Damon Buxton’s album cover, which is one reason I picked that music. He’s got three albums. This song is from the last one, “Unbroken.”
Now that dog has a taste for Scalzi. Beware, John!
I want to run screaming for the hills AND lick your face like a dog at the same time. That is not only physically impossible but horrible wrong on a multitude of levels. Well played, Sir.
I’m officially out of poster space on my dorm room walls but I will get a ladder to put this on the ceiling if I have to.
Those roller derby girls should open a frosting salon. They definitely improved your appearance. ;-)
And wow. Neil’s house and yard look to be almost as big as yours.
what a charmed life you lead.
And I thought the Indigestible Man only existed in The Tick.
Also, at 2:00 on the film – “What, no frosting for the dog’s face? I protects you from squirrels!”
It was bound to happen sooner or later.
I think I just feel in love with you.
Fell, feel, whatever!
Procrastination Level: Expert
Nobody does it quite like John Scalzi.
So, who wins in an argument if one person pull this out, and the other relies on Neil on a trampoline? Hmm?
You’re setting an unreasonable standard of confectionary goodness for future SFWA presidents now, you know.
I second the desire for a t-shirt.
For 40,000 followers I think you should demonstrate a use for a spare goat… with roller derby girls… on Neil Gaiman’s front lawn.
Now you know how your cat felt covered with bacon. Payback is a bitch.
Yeah, Jean A beat me to it. The only proper resolution would have been bringing Ghlaghghee to the shoot so she could lick the frosting off your face. But it’s a lovely concept and execution nonetheless.
John, I envy the hell out of whoever ends up writing the definitive John Scalzi biography.
Curiousity lands and explores mars, Chad whatshisname lands Avril Lavigne and John Scalzi gets covered in frosting… 2012.. what a year!
Glorious. Absolutely glorious. Kyle Cassidy. Roller Derby girls. Neil Gaiman. John Scalzi. Frosting. These are a few of my favorite things…
Is Neil Gaiman’s house haunted? Because it looks like it should be. Some ghost should get on that.
Writers and kitties?
Writers AND kitties? Okay, I’m sorry, I can’t ever seem to remember this one; would someone remind me what the difference is again?
If this were romance or porn the next step is the movie showing how the frosting is licked off of your body.
It is nice to see someone famous(!) using the correct flipping-the-bird technique.
Oh my god, that second pic with you in buttercream and the two-handed flip off had me laughing. Otlichno! as they say in Russian.
you, mister Scalzi, are a positive cake model, a perfect conveyance of frosting, a human cupcake! Thank you for your good-sportsman-ship, you are a personal hero. Kitties & authors, no soul could resist that peanut butter & jelly combo. Already dreaming of the 40K ceremony.
and yes, gentle reader, Mariam W, Neil’s house IS indeed haunted, by very sweet ghosts of indeterminable origin.
This project has been amazing so far, let’s see what happens when Gaiman unleashes his followers…
When the posters get here, I am sending you a big batch to do with what you will. My love to your radiant wife.
-Kitty Cat (@neverwear on the twitter)
PS my husband, Drew the Tall, has now devoured all your books and is probably going to harangue you, George-R.R.-Martin-fanstyle. I told him you are Not his bitch, but he feels a bee-sting bond with you. Feel free to ignore his mewling pleas, write at your own pace, don’t hurry on account of us poor roadies, the deprived wanderers of the world, slavishly bringing the entertainment to the masses.
For 40K followers, you should repeat it with bacon grease. Cold, congealed bacon grease. On Neil’s dog’s birthday.
This is a beautiful thing! and, City Kitties is a great organization…I think I will need to find some wall space. It will be perfect to bring to your next Philly signing!
Maybe somebody has already pointed this out but I scanned the comments and I don’t think they have. So let me say that “Frosting Scalzi” would make an awesome band name.
“Frost the Scalzi” is the 21st Century “Candy-coat.” As in, “I’m not going to frost the Scalzi for you Ms. Thompson. Your son may never play the violin again.”
Well done, Scalzi.
Long, long ago I passed out on a sofa backstage with my head hanging over the arm of the sofa. When I came to, I discovered my head (other than my nostrils and mouth but including my glasses) had been covered with paper mache. (The rest of the story … nah, not as good as your Claude Rains impersonation.) I can assure you, though, that frosting is a much more pleasant experience.
Frosting Scalzi is the name of my next band….
“The Best Kind of Strange” has got to be the title of your auto-biography.
Neil must really miss Amanda.
@Miriamspia: Well, if he’d lain down on the lawn the dogs would’ve probably taken care of that very quickly. So, is that porn?
Now I’m wondering if in 25 years we’ll have a successful broadway play “Frost/Scalzi”?
Tagline for the movie poster: “It’s alive! Diabetic, but alive!”
I think this should join the Bloggess’s collection of photos of internet (demi?)-gods doing things. Though collating papers and holding twine are perhaps more pedestrian than being covered in buttercream….
“Frosting Scalzi” has to be a Flogging Molly cover band.
I don’t have any interest in a poster (more accurate: nowhere wife-approved to hang it) so I went and gave $5 each to the kitties and the SFWA fund. And I have to say, it is way too hard to give a few bucks to the SFWA fund, John. You should wave your clout around and make that easier. I know paypal is unpopular in a lot of circles but clicking one button to give is sooooooo much easier than entering information in two separate forms (with some duplicated info across the two).