My Poor Stoned Puppy
Posted on February 6, 2013 Posted by John Scalzi 57 Comments
Daisy has developed a nasty cough and the vet gave us some cough suppressant, which she warned might have the side effect of making Daisy drowsy. Well, it has the side effect of making her stoned, is what it does; after I gave it to her, she sat one of her beds, head wobbling, and just, like, really looked at her paws, man. For hours.
Poor puppy.
It’s so sad when they’re drugged to the nines. They don’t seem to enjoy it much, but it has to be better than a racking cough.
Did she eat all the Doritos and play Halo 4 all day, too?
Awww…poor girl. Hope she’s better soon. Pericat’s right, it does seem to make them unhappy when they’re feeling weird like that–they probably think “man, I’m even SICKER now. This CAN’T be good,” But I know she’ll get lots of love and attention to make her feel more secure.
I am sorry that Daisy is sick but hooray for another pup photo! She is just gorgeous.
Did the vet give you a diagnosis? Some canine coughing can be indicative of very bad things…Like canine flu, bordatella, etc.
Until you have thoroughly studied the paw, it is really not fair to disparage the deepness of these hours of paw meditation.
Aww. Poor girl, hope she feels better soon!
I hope Daisy’s all right!
A couple of my dogs had a cough for a day or two, but it went away. Hope that sweet puppy of yours gets well.
Gregg Bender:
Nothing too serious.
Cough suppressants are the devil. They suppress a rather broad band of useful things inadvertantly. Not that I’m speaking from personal experience. DEVIL.
John, How many hours did YOU spend looking at Daisy looking at her paws?
Well I would not feel so all alone… ;-)
Gregg Bender:
I am resisting my impulse to do a Google search for bordatella.
I find my interpretation of what that illness is (she is in danger of becoming a border terrier) to be much better than reality could ever be.
Poor? Nah. People pay good money for that feeling. I think she was super stoked.
If she sits in the middle of the floor & tries to debate the cats on hidden meanings in Steely Dan lyrics, cut back on the meds.
@JReynolds: Don’t resist anymore. Bordetellas are a bunch of nasty small gram-negative feckers that you don’t really want to touch without antibiotics.
Bordatella sounds like something you’d get on an antipasti plate, until you find out what it is. Then you really don’t want to find it on an antipasti plate.
“Did you ever, like, totally contemplate your paws? Because they’re, like, TOTALLY… paw-like, dude.”
Poor puppy, my ass. I wish I could get stoned and sit in one of my beds looking at my feet for hours today. Poor puppy about having a nasty cough, though.
Well, have you every looked at your paws? Really looked. They’re amazing! So – wow. Just wow. Where are the snacks?
Poor Daisy. I hope she feels better soon. This reminds me of when I took my cats in to be fixed. The female, Gizmo, had to be fully under and was loopy the whole day afterwards and was in utter and complete love with me and wouldn’t let Popper, my male cat, near her. Now, this was a cat that was normally skittish around everyone, so to have so much kitty love was a treat.
I just wish she didn’t have to be drugged to the nines for it to happen.
“Dude, my paws are huuuuuuuuuge.”
Not seeing what’s sad about this. I mean. People spend a lot of effort and money trying to enter such states; maybe dogs like them too?
Now we’ve ALL looked at Daisy’s paws.
Poor puppy. Hope she feels better soon.
This doesn’t have anything to do with your poor dog (I wish her a speedy recovery), but, although I have been fighting the temptation for several days, I just have to say, in my best Elmer Fudd voice: “You–you–you WABBIT!”
Thank you for your tolerance. I feel much better now.
My thoughts are with Daisy as she endeavours to work out why her paws look different; on the other hand, I suspect that elsewhere on teh Internet kitten wannabes are gearing up to include dog drugging amongst our host’s many crimes…
“Internet kitten wannabes are gearing up to include dog drugging amongst our host’s many crimes…”
Yes, that much seems certain.
You can post this yet when I get my dog stoned I get the cops called.
My husband went to the doc for a cough today and all he got was antibiotics. If he’d got what Daisy got, our evening might have been a bit more…relaxed.
Good health and happy frolicking to the pupster, though!
Bordatella sounds like compulsive dancing caused by the bite of a border collie.
At least she’s handling it better than the elephant scientists pumped full of LSD back in the 60s. Yes, they really did that, and no it did end well.
You know what you need to do now? Give the cats some catnip. Then you’d have a *party*.
Just put on some Grateful Dead and she’ll be ok.
@ da beans – I was thinking some The Dark Side of the Moon and The Wizard of Oz, but whatever floats your boat.
When my elderly cat had to have some teeth pulled a couple of years before he left us for good, they gave me some painkillers to give him for the first couple of days after the surgery.
So much for my dignified cat. He was all *over* me. Affectionate and lovey and purring louder than I thought it was possible for a cat to purr. I swear I could hear him in the next room. He wanted to love on his brother as much as he did on me, but apparently the meds made him smell funny, because his brother wouldn’t have anything to do with him (that was usual with those two — any time either one of them went to the vet, it took till several days after any meds were done before things were back to normal).
I still miss those cats, even though I love the kittens I got this past summer, too.
Daisy looks like she got the same kinda meds the doc gave me once for Pneumonia. With about the same side effect. Play “Dark Side of the Moon” for her and see if she experiences time standing still also. When you can pluck a photon out of the air… ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo…
If you were really cruel, you would replace all her dog toys with cat toys and start feeding her cat food.
Aw, poor pup. Dozer had some hydromorphone last week and he hated it. He was all, “What am I doing here? I … what? What am I *doing* here?” with added whines and whimpers. It was very sad. Hope Daisy feels better at the soonest.
@heckblazer: Jesus. That story was so sad.
Any issue w/ pets, I refer to the wife, because she works in the vet industry. So, we’ve had a lot of pets. What is so awful, is that you can’t explain to your cat or dog why everything is all wonky. They just have to endure, and sometimes that is totally not cool. So they get freaked out by being wonky and drugged, without understanding why, and that sucks. Love them lots, it helps.
@kevin …. Remember, start it on the second roar.
John- can I have your vets name? I have a cough and stoned is better than antibiotics.
Best wishes for your poor pup. She’ll be better soon.
Awwww…
We have to give our dog a sedative to get her claws clipped, and she’s similarly stoned every time.
It’s interesting that only beings capable of higher reasoning enjoy being drunk or “drugged to the nines” and losing said ability.
In fact I’d say there was a strong positive correlation between the ability to reason and enjoying being “out of it” just look at most of my peers, mathematicians, who enjoy an 80-proof drink with their math proofs.
Not me, of course.
I had to laugh a bit, but I seriously do hope Daisy is feeling better. I always feel to badly for critters when they don’t feel well.
It’s interesting that only beings capable of higher reasoning enjoy being drunk or “drugged to the nines” and losing said ability.
In fact I’d say there was a strong positive correlation between the ability to reason and enjoying being “out of it” just look at most of my peers, mathematicians, who enjoy an 80-proof drink with their math proofs.
That puts me in mind of claims I’ve heard that people in positions of power often enjoy playing the role of sub in BSDM activities – they get sick of always having to be in charge or control, and find that indulging in the aforementioned activities allows them an escape from that. I imagine that Charles de Gaulle was getting at the same thing (in a decidedly less extreme fashion) when he once said, “Hearing Mass is the ceremony I most favor during my travels. Church is the only place where someone speaks to me and I do not have to answer back.”
Re Daisy’s apparent distress at being stoned, I’d have to say I can relate. My first experience being stoned was certainly not one I enjoyed – it probably didn’t help that I’d ingested the dope unsuspectingly (by consuming some strange-looking (and rather disgusting-tasting) greenish cake at an equally strange party (one where I knew hardly anybody)*). Suddenly finding that time seemed to have broken up into a million disconnected moments, with things that happened even a few seconds earlier seeming really unreal and dream-like, proved a most disorienting and frightening experience for me.
*In my defence I was very young and naive at the time.
Best of luck to her. She’s a lovely dog
Naa, She’s looking at her paws and thinking “If I had thumbs, I COULD RULE THE WORLD!!!”
How’s the stoner pooch doing today?
The real problem will happen in a couple of days when the poor googie is running around frantically begging you for another hit!
“Come on MAN! JUST A TASTE! I NEED IT MAN!
The last time my greyhound got stoned, it was because the dumbass ate a battery and had to go to the emergency vet and be encouraged to cough it up. The injection they gave him to make him vomit also stoned him off his freaking gourd.
Which worked out, actually, because our dog is stupid, and believes that riding in cars is a time to test his balance, rather than a time to sit down so he will not injure himself or block the rear view mirror. When we take him in the car, one of us has to sit in the back seat and hold him to keep him still.
So we got into the car after we left the vet, and he just face-planted right into my lap. He spent the trip home actually lying down, and sorta vaguely trying to figure out what his tongue was (because he could see it hanging out the side of his mouth), and why he was unable to lick it.
Needless to say, we hide the batteries now.
I hope Daisy feels better–poor girl.
So Daisy’s experience demonstrates that cough suppressant is ecstasy for dogs?
“Duuuuude, I can taste colors…”
I hope Daisy’s feeling better today.
John, I hope Daisy is better. I
I apologize for not completing my irrelevant comment. Dreaded invisible computer gremlins have invaded my laptop and I must go fight them now.