Look! The Cover to The Mallet of Loving Correction!
Posted on April 3, 2013 Posted by John Scalzi 70 Comments
And it is epic:
I love love love this cover. The artist is Nate Taylor, who some of you might recognize due to his work on this. He nailed this cover about as hard as the cartoon version of me is about to nail that troll. So kudos to him. This is awesome.
Also, this is a fine time to remind you that The Mallet of Loving Correction’s signed, limited edition hardcover is available for pre-order on the Subterranean Press Web site. Only 1,500 hardcovers will be published! Avoid the rush!
This *is* epic! I already ordered my copy, and am looking forward to receiving it and reading it!
That’s the best cover for a book I’ve seen in years! Also for some reason I actually envision you doing a running leap with the mallet in real life!
I love the cover. Maybe it’s because we’ve been reading his stuff with my 6-year-old, but it reminds me very much of Shel Silverstein.
Oh, and John? Nice pants. ;)
So it’s tough-loving correction, then.
A thing of beauty, top to bottom. And the two tiny figurines on the desktop are a wonderful touch…are they identifiable in a larger version?
What are the two little figures on the corner of the desk?
I love you baby. You need to reign in the ego a bit. I am speaking as a friend here. I have been where you are going and you don’t want to go there.
My advice is to find a group of people that are smarter, more talented and more successful then you and spend a lot of time in their company for awhile, avoid the worshipers for a bit they are getting pretty thick around here.
Nice! I enjoy the fact that the mallet is drawn to scale and that you’ve choked up on it for control. No wild malleting.
Is killing trolls with hammers the gateway to doing the same to hobos?
What are the two little doodads on the edge of the desk?
Excellent work, made me snort, but I have to disagree with Dave Branson. Given that this is an accurate representation of your form, you need to move your hands down to the bottom of the Mallet to get more leverage and Mallet-speed. And keep your knuckles aligned with each other. And make sure the trademark on the handle of the Mallet is facing you, so you don’t break it. Go to any batting cage for practice, you’ll be in mis-season form in no time!
“A Friend”:
Actual friends of mine wouldn’t post a comment like yours anonymously. Therefore, I will give this opinion the consideration it deserves.
I was hoping for a sequel to the Sub Press cover of “Hate Mail”. Scalzi, photoshopped into an avenging angel, wields a flaming Mallet…of Love.
Is there going to be a Kindle version of this?
And you could pose like RSHD does in his flaming sword pic!
Nobody thinks Mr Scalzi is a god, and so far as I know, nobody worships him. We do, however, respect his far greater than ordinary ability to write stuff we like to read. It’ll never win, or even be considered for, a Nobel in literature, or a Pulitzer prize. True. So what. It’s fun. That’s too rare in the current publishing world.
You got Shel Silverstein to Illustrate the cover… beyond the grave!
First book cover I’ve wanted a poster of. Well done, Mr. Scalzi and Mr. Taylor!
Hm. John’s not quite as manic as I thought he’d be….
Just to clarify you don’t know me or anything and I do enjoy your work. It’s up to you what to do with my comment and I won’t post on it again, don’t want to troll.
The other thing that helps is watching fight club over and over for about a week…
That is a thing of beauty right there.
What a cool cover!
Am I the only one who had flashbacks to Better Off Dead and Lane’s cartoons?
I didn’t know you could levitate!
My only question is, what cartoon sound does The Mallet make when it strikes, a la the Adam West Batman series: BONK? BONG? BOING? BOIIINNNG? For some reason, I see it as a “B” sound
As much as I want this the shipping cost up to Canada is ridiculous, nearly equal to the cost of the book itself.
Stil, that is a very cool cover.
@David Gustafson, I think it depends on the skull it’s striking. I’m picturing sort of a >BLORT<.
I especially love the fact your glasses are part way off. Good artists are worth their weight in gold.
That is indeed an epic cover. I love how the troll just looks so innocuous sitting there, while you’re the one who looks batshit insane. Fun reversal of what’s actually the case. :)
I think it makes SMOOCH.
POSTER! You and Nate must put this out as a poster. It will fit perfectly right above the altar, Matted under glass of course to protect it from the motor oil and mayonnaise.
That is a fucking awesome cover. I worship the deity that’s watching over your publishers’ choices of illustrator and translator :P
Aaaaauuugh such a freaking great cover! Congratulations on scoring adorable art for your book.
– An Actual Friend
I think you might have over shot the troll :)
Can’t wait for the book. I Ordered my copy the second I heard about it. I freaking love the cover to this. Nate Taylor’s drawings are some of my favorites. He does some awesome sketches over on Pat Rothfuss’ site. Congatulations on all the nominations this week!
I like how “A Friend” assumes that Mr. Scalzi for one knows nothing about internet “fandom” and two that he’s going to a dark place, like it’s some sort of AA meeting. I have to say that was the best cry for attention to get a response in years. Love reading comments on this website, you never know what you’re going to get
“Friend” needs to learn it’s “rein in,” which makes sense, not “reign in,” which doesn’t.
Pet peeve of mine.
I think the cover’s wonderful, done with just the right amount of the right details.
I had actually convinced myself that I wouldn’t buy this (the wife and I are trying to save money but the Human Division hardback is in the budget!). I may have to go without a few lunches just for that cover! Its like Shel Silverstein came back from the grave!
I just had a tiny joy-gasm in my heart. ^^ This would make a fun poster.
Perfect. Tee shirts and plush toys to follow?
Not to mention a musical…
How’d he know what I look like?
I am really looking forward to my copy of this.
I use some of the blog posts in my daily life (the ones on writing for people who don’t write professionally), get a good chuckle out of others and find some really thought provoking. The readership here is pretty intelligent, the comments are worth following and trolls get malletted; usually before it turns into a poo-flinging contest. If not then John cleans up the threads and keeps people on track in a way I wish to see more of in national newspapers and other forums.
That said I’ll continue to buy these books so long as they continue to be published.
Awesome cover! Will there be a paper back version? I vote for tee-shirts, myself.
I can’t understand how anyone can see that cover and get ‘egotistical writer with a god complex’ out of that. If that were true, wouldn’t you have gotten yourself done by someone like Boris instead of the very funny cartoony-but-still-realistic cover you have?
For the record, I imagine a Boris Vallejo painting of you would be kind of awesome, in the same way as that Velvet Wesley was.
I love the unbridled enthusiasm on your cartoony face. :D
Reblogged this on The Blunt Instrument and commented:
Best. Cover. Ever.
There has to be tee-shirts in the near future. I want this book just for the cover. No eBook either, not that I don’t like them. Of course I’ll read it. I need some laughter.
What are those small figures on the table?
Good cover. Except for the choke hold on the handle of the mallet. What are you doing … going to freaking bunt the trolls head? All weapon nerds know that you really need your hands out at the ends of the handle to get the biggest swing arc, which gives you the largest increase of momentum. Which equals a bigger hit. Just like a good golf swing with a driver.
And for some reason that troll reminds me of the Great Ahz …….a little older and seedier.
Incredible.. Nate’s artwork just succeeded in selling another copy of this book. I was going to grab the kindle edition, but now I’m grabbing both kindle and hardback.
That’s just full of so much awesome.
A few people asked about the little statue thingies on the desk, but got no answer. Is it safe to assume that they are Ensigh Dahl and the UU Capital Ship Intrepid?
I wasn’t intending to buy the book (because, you know, I’ve already read the content) but the cover a) is making me rethink that and b) is the first time I have laughed out loud at cover art. Nice one.
That cover. It’s ‘zine-licious. I wasn’t gonna buy the book, but maybe…
I always thought of you applying the mallet with a “more in sorrow than in anger” look.
That cover is highly amusing.
Beautiful cover. Will this version include any of the comments from the site? I have always enjoyed them together. My two sons (17 & 14 at the time) loved ‘Hate Mail’, and I’m sure we’ll all enjoy this one as well.
Chris:
I don’t own the copyright on the comments and tracking down permissions would be a pain in the ass, so, no.
I don’t think you’ll overshoot the troll. I think you’re on the down-swoop from your rage-induced kungfu leap. After all, you have been raising your baby blog for fifteen years – I know how I react if someone attacks my guys! (And the little Star-Trek figurines on the troll’s desk are a great detail).
One more copy ordered – I wonder if they planned a large enough print run?
Oh man. Oh MAN. That is simply, utterly perfect cover art, and it made me laugh so hard that I nearly hurt myself.
I love everything about this.
I love it. LOVE IT. I wasn’t going to buy the book originally, but the cover is changing my mind. It’s so perfectly full of joyous cartoony rage.
I like how Nate Taylor drew you, John, but he drew my computer wrong.
John,
Love the cover. Nate did a great job.
I 2nd the suggestion on making posters. Or possibly small 81/2 x 11 prints. These would be great to have available on your book tours for those who want to pick up a little special something either for themselves or to give someone as a gift.
Maybe I missed it, but will the shaded background for your posts ever be coming back? It was always nice to have your comments stand out from the others.
In regards to comments and copyrights. It is great that the a commenter retains the rights to their posts and that there is not some mumbo-jumbo in the small print that says you are entitled to use the comments as you see fit. Now I need to ask, why don’t have some mumbo-jumbo above the comment entry box that would allow you to use comments in your Whatever collections?
Accuracy is important, but trolls have thick skulls. In real life, I think you should
try holding the mallet further down the handle and getting a real swing on it.
Practice may be needed ….
Will
You CAN’T judge a book by it’s…never mind, it’s awesome.
Great cover. The author is obviously getting his inner samurai on.
The next volume of selected Whatever essays needs to be called “The Kittening Setting.”
@Dragon: John’s posts are still green shaded for me…
And it looks even more wonderful in colour reverse; truly the artist is a genius…
@Brian Mann: Thanks. I almost exclusively check in on Whatever during the day on a different computer. Well I’m home now and checked in to see what my screen here shows; what do ya know it’s green. Now what the hell is up with my other monitor???
In case you need to replace your mallet, there’s one recently available that has some previous usage on trolls. Swedish archaeologists report discovering it (The Local: Swedish news in English) during subway construction in Stockholm. Although analysts have yet to identify the metal, experts told Stenarna it was likely a complex alloy, as there was no oxidation on the surface of the giant hammer. “The object, engraved in intricate runes and lightning bolts, measures more than 60 centimetres from handle to head. Once removed, experts said it would likely weigh more than 50 kilogrammes. Because half of the hammer head is still stuck in the rock, archaeologists have said they do not want to release the translation of the runes to the public before they can access the entire text.”
Why yes, the article was posted on 1 April, why do you ask?
heh heh hee
yes, yes, that’s an awesome cover.
I just got one of the limited signed editions after placing a regular order through a customer service agent at a store. Very nice, since it was my husband’s birthday gift for me, and a pleasant surprise. How were there any left this long?