And Now, Here I Am in a Regency Dress
Posted on July 16, 2013 Posted by John Scalzi 144 Comments
So, Mary Robinette Kowal is over for a visit, and she brought her Regency dresses, because why wouldn’t she. Someone on Twitter mentioned that they wanted to see me in one, so I said, fine, if people on Twitter could send $500 in donations to the Clarion Foundation in half an hour, I’d take a picture in one of the dresses. We raised $600. Here I am in a Regency dress. And it looks fetching on me, I have to say.
Maybe that curious Mr. Babbage will let you help him with his thinking engine.
Not bad at all.
Not really your COLOR, though, John. I’d say something in primrose, or orange blossom, with amber ribbons…. much more your color scheme.
Just trying to be helpful!
Is she visiting so you can prepare your plans for the True Dungeon session?
That poor dog!
Your stays need tightening, dear.
That is just lovely, sir. Lovely.
Note to self. Never be in mid-sip of my coffee when paging through Whatever.
I disagree: I think that’s a LOVELY colour on you, but the mint green against the hot green of the lawn is a little jarring.
Can you offer us some more congenial poses in a different environment? Maybe another dress? This is just my colour sense speaking, of course.
Empire silhouettes totally work for you, John. The headpiece is a nice touch as well. But no gloves? tsk tsk.
I dunno, I think the color is designed for a redhead.
And when you say “fetching” I assume that the dog was involved….” You do look quite delightful, sir! (Though I dare say a proper tail coat might be quite the thing.)
That shade of green is tough to carry off, but I think you manage it. Without your beard, though, it would totally wash you out.
Feather brings it all together.
But now that you know your fundraising power, can you really stop? It’s like your superpower. Would the internet pay $1,000 to a worthy cause to see you in, say, Steampunk wench?
Couldn’t get enough of dress up as a child?
Not only are you a man of your word, you know how to accessorize!
the dress makes you look fat
It is a truth universally acknowledged that an author in possession of a good Twitter following must be in need of … invitations to commit photo stunts that raise money.
You, sir, are a mensch.
Underpinnings man! You can’t run around naked under your dress!
Soooo … definitely *not* “the next Robert Heinlein”, then.
Just as well, really.
That shade of green would clash worse with http://d3j5vwomefv46c.cloudfront.net/photos/large/790849652.jpg?1373913997
(Lifted from http://www.jimchines.com/2013/07/pc-monsters-of-genre/ which also features your house guest I see)
There should be a stretch goal to double the donation to post a video of Mary and your Wife waxing your chest…
Unfortunately, there are some things you just can’t “unsee.” I’ll be afraid to go to sleep tonight. Nightmares.
Would a gentleman really have shown that much décolletagé?
Forsooth, thou do seriously rock.
Also, love your fine canine’s expression.
I especially like the fascinator.
EEEK!
Hydration. Lots of fluids. The heat can really mess with your mind this time of year….
Too much bosom on display, not nearly enough leg.
Good thing I haven’t had lunch yet. Uh, I mean, very nice, sir. Ma’am. Sir-ma’am. Sma’am.
@Canyon42: that’s the Regency for you…
@John Weiss: True, true – no matching shoes? How could he…
@Bruce: I’d recommend a parasol just as well.
You look lovely, but I think pearls would suit you better, and you need a nice wrist bag. ANd shoes. You’re showing far too much ankle.
John this just ups the ante for any future stunts. What happens next? A full body wax?
Stylin’!
Difficult color, green.
The fascinator really brings the whole thing together.
The hat definitely makes the look. Assuming that’s the look you want…
Bit of synchronicity, that. I’m reading through Boneshaker just now and that dress just seems to /fit/.
It’s scary how well that dress fits.
Well that’s just darling! Lucky she had one in your size.
Charming, my dear. Absolutely charming.
Lovely!
Boldly going where no fundraiser has gone before. Impressive, innovative and successful. I would suggest not just twittering these efforts – add FB too and I think you’d really increase the $ you raise.
Now you are just trolling your stalkers.
Is that a skunk on your head?
I’m imagining a new title for a space opera adventure: A Return to the Empire [Waist].
Definitely confident in your manhood! However, the stays of the day did help the silhouette, and, as previously mentioned, no gloves and parasol in the sun? Fascinator the best touch of all. Your fundraising tactics are to be admired.
I genuinely think it looks nice, no comical “oh ho ho middle-aged man in dress”. Except for the red neck thing — what is that?
“You’re showing far too much ankle.”
I suppose he didn’t have a choice, the dress was probably originally made for someone a bit shorter.
Still not as extreme as the time a friend of ours tried on my wife’s old prom dress. She is 5’2″. He is about 6’5″. The dress fit him surprisingly well around the body, but it was supposed to be floor-length, and on him it was a knee-length skirt.
The problem is that this is obviously an evening gown and therefore inappropriate for the daytime.
I was once told by a young lady in a con elevator that the reason she loved Regency dances so much was that ‘everyone has boobs in a Regency dress!’ She appears to hve been proven correct…
Lady Grantham: “One can’t go to pieces at the death of every foreigner. We’d all be in a constant state of collapse whenever we opened a newspaper.”
The dog is thinking “Business as usual at the Scalzi compound.”
I find your dress…disturbing. Not the best color on you, I think you need a warmer tone.
Congrats on the fund raising. And nice hat.
@Allison:
I don’t know, it might be a day dress, but he needs a Spencer jacket, lace neckerchief, and a bonnet or straw hat to wear it outside. Also, accessories–gloves, reticule, parasol, SHOES. The fascinator is definitely only for evenings, though. Rather risque, our host. Ah, well, writers are notoriously eccentric in their attire.
He’s showing exactly the right amount of ankle. We’re the same height and it’s a ball gown. Ankles were not risque until the Victorian era.
Does this mean you and Mary are the same size? Because that seems . . . highly implausible to me.
Re: accessories. He needs an instrument. Yes, a uke playing a bit of whimsy… perhaps Tiptoe thru the Tulips?
$600 in half an hour. Sir, it’s a good thing you only use your powers for good. :)
Even Daisy has a look that says, “Dafuq is going on here?”
That, or “I wish there was a squirrel.”
One of those.
You’re a good, brave man to make such an offer, and an even better one to follow through.
It’s a good thing you have a WAY big yard, John. Most farmers don’t horse around with telephoto lense.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!!!
*gasps for breath*
Nice! And you raised some quick money for charity on the bargain! The feathery thing and the fetching chest hair are just so out of place…but surprisingly good-looking.
The only thing that could make that picture better is you holding a gun and doing a seductive pose in the dress. I think I saw a spy novel cover like that once.
Did they not wear chemises in the regency?
“Not the prettiest of the Misses Bennett, but with a wonderfully good heart.”
@ Xopher:
Nah, Scalzi’s definitely good enough to pass for Elizabeth Bennett. Now we need Mrs. Scalzi in a Mr. Darcy suit…
Sweet Jeebuz, Mr. Scalzi. You’re acting like that closeted kid in college who enjoyed turning every game of Truth or Dare homoerotic. As an adult you can embrace your inner cross-dresser without a veil of twitter charity.
@ Floored, what a brilliant idea. The already drop dead gorgeous wife of our esteemed Author, would absolutely slay, in proper men’s dress.
Replace Daisy with a couple of corgis and you’d have a fair impression of the queen going on.
That’s really unfair; Daisy is far prettier than corgis!
@ Xana: Oh, totally. Now, we need a Mr. Collins (not very bright, annoying–I know a few creationists who would be perfect) and a Mr. Wickham (asshole–take your pick).
I’m sorry, V’s Herbie; I should have saluted your insistence on the underpinnings before I pointed out that Daisy is far prettier than corgis.
On the other hand, I really can’t see Scalzi getting into early 19th century stays..
Really need a coach & four in the background…
Would it have killed you to wax?
All in all I would have to say that you have truly found your look. You OWN that dress and will undoubtedly need the dog to ward off suitors who will be following you everywhere.
So, just thinkin’.
Dogs freak out when things change. That dog looks calm. Sooooo… I infer that you wear dresses like this a lot.
Which is pretty cool, because the look sorta works.
JOHN: Stylin’!
DOG: I wonder if he’s going to feed me any time soon.
I think Iggy Pop said it best: “I’m not ashamed to dress ‘like a woman’ because I don’t think it’s shameful to be a woman.” – Iggy Pop
Go SCALZI!!
You’ll be the envy of every girl at the ball. Finally! We can find you that husband and save Uncle Juan’s fortune.
I’m suspecting you paid the $600 yourself so you could feel pretty.
You look…stunning.
I am decidedly proud to have instigated this. *g*
It’s the coordination of your necklace and Daisy’s collar that really sets the whole ensemle off.
Seriously???
You cannot go out dressed like that without a proper bonnet.
What the hell are you thinking???
giggle. gigglegigglegiggle SNORT! HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA whoof! – gets breath back.
You don’t look half-bad, and well done on the fundraiser :)
The high, empire waist really flatters your bosom.
[Deleted for line-crossing, which was possibly unintentional – JS]
On behalf of the Clarion Foundation, let me just say Thank You, Thank You, and Thank You again. Your shameless offering is our deeply appreciated gain. You are a peach, as are all those who responded to your peachiness.
Did poor Mary have to burn the dress after this desecration?
I’m really impressed that Mary was willing to risk her awesome hand-sewn dress on you!
Also, my brain is reeling at the proof that you and Mary are approximately the same size. I’ve met both of you in person, even seen you standing next to each other, and wouldn’t have thought that.
As others have said, though, it’s not really your color. Something red or reddish. And gloves and a parasol (I’m thinking Mary’s gloves would in no way fit on your manly arms).
I’m agreed with @Floored that now we need you in this get-up and Krissy as Mr. Darcy. It would be, as the kids say, hawt.
LOL. Maybe I could borrow it–I’m going to the JASNA AGM in September and have nothing to wear to the ball. :-)
I can’t tell if Daisy is gazing at you in admiration, or she’s trying to “think” you into changing out of that silly dress so you can feed her.
It is awfully hard for men to find delicate dancing shoes that match their dresses.
I’m starting to think, “I’ll do it if it’s for charity” is just an excuse here. Oh, sure, justify it by claiming you’re doing a good cause for money…but really, you just wanna dress up and show it off on the Internet. Good show, sir!
At this very moment, the designer of that dress is thinking about enrolling in one of those long-haul-trucking classes.
Ah! I finally understand the whole ‘corset’ thing… Uh, not that you’re not totally stunning the way you are. No, really! I mean, um, really, really, um, stunning. Yes. That. Sorry, got to run, there’s a, uh, croquet match I’m late for…
I see you have the fierce hands on hips model pose down pat. Tyra would be so proud.
Looks like things are going to take a really weird turn in season 4 of Downton Abbey…
Ravishing, sir. Simply ravishing.
Both the style and the color are extremely well chosen for your figure and coloring. True, the vivid green of the grass in the background is perhaps a bit overpowering, but if you posed appropriately in a proper drawing room….
I must respectfully disagree with those who advocate waxing. I firmly believe that the hirsute decolletage is a truly spectacular fashion accessory, and one to which most of us cannot aspire.
Erm, just one minor suggestion, if I may be so bold. A good corset would greatly improve the fit through the midsection, to say nothing of increasing the prominence of that manly decolletage. They’re really quite comfortable once you get used to them, you know.
Would you do a Molly Millions outfit for $1000?
You make one, ugly woman, Scalzi.
;)
Yes, but how much is Daisy’s therapy going to cost?
So, if $500 buys us a regency dress, what can we expect for higher amounts?
Perhaps some day, purely as an experiment of course, you should volunteer (threaten) to model something unless you get $1000 in donations before a certain time.
John – the dress is smashing but the cornfield in the background has to go…now, something on the order of Brideshead…
Jim Hines shaved. Just saying…
Are we thinking about starring in a remake of TO WONG FOO, THANKS FOR EVERYTHING, JULIE NEWMAR?
And what did Krissy and/or Athena have to say about your little foray into crossdressing?
I support the right of every man to wear the frock of his choice, but you’ll get sunburned if you go out in the daytime without your bonnet.
Even though the feather is just charming, and brings out your eyes. And pea green is really your colour!
[Deleted because this dipshit is stupid enough to think calling me gay is an insult. Poor sad little homophobe – JS]
Fetching…Yes, THAT was the word I was thinking of….
How about Scarlett O’Hara’s green curtain dress next time? Or maybe the white one with green squiggles and the big hat that she wore to the picnic in the beginning of the movie.
I was taught to compliment people and how well they wear things, so to twist your comment around:
You look very fetching in that that dress, John! ;-)
I do feel quite under-dressed for this blog, however. . . .
I just thought of Mr. Scalzi in a corset. That was ten minutes ago. I have been laughing since then.
Congratulations to Mr. Scalzi for being secure enough in his masculinity to share this picture. I regret to say that, although I am certainly more secure in my manliness than absolutely nobody at all and his gibbering thralls, I am not as self-confident as Mr. Scalzi. One day, though, this will change. Probably when I am about forty, with a hairy chest.
That dress makes your butt look big.
I wondered how that got started. I saw the end and was like, “Why would he even think to do something like that?”
Absolutely fetching and for a wonderful cause no less! You are a wonderful human being! I wonder how much money you could raise if you and Wil Wheaton dressed up like that together! ;)
I, for one, welcome our outgoing Vitamin D deficient overlords.
That’s something I won’t be able to un- remember.
“As he ransacked his jewelry boxes and drawers, Mr. Scalzi felt a brief pang of regret that he had passed on the Campbell tiara….”
I officially forgive you for never picking a caption winner.
Maybe this needs one of the robots from Pacific Rim…
You look lovely. Thank you for this, I didn’t have enough random weirdness in my day until now.
How much for a picture of the Dog in a dress?
Thanks for helping out Clarion. You are a scholar and gentleman.
The high feather sells it beautifully.
Colonel Snuggledorf, “Hirsute Decolletage” would make a totally great hipster band name, possibly one that involves ukeleles.
I’m impressed by the period-authentic dog. Nice touch.
A parasol would be just the thing for this ensemble. Perhaps one in a lovely coral to match the necklace? :D
Seriously though, you sir are the best. You somehow manage to make people’s day better AND donate 600 bucks to charity in one blow. Thank you!
I still think it’s the coral beads that really pull the look together. (Mary told me on twitter that they’re real beads from the early 1800s–they’d be very appropriate to a lady of fashion, and certainly no less appropriate than pearls).
The sleeves of the dress are wonderful: but the colour, a tad too pale on you. I agree with the commenters suggesting reddish or darker green tones. I can’t entirely agree about the coral beads. Jade, yes. Rose quartz? Maybe.
A brown spencer on the top -VELVET, YES- would have carried it over.
The feather was absolutely the right choice.
Oh…my. That’s a feather in your cap. Quite literally. :) Go, John!
Did Daisy get to try on the dress? She looks like she’s politely waiting for you to offer.
Sudden thought: we need all members of the PC Monsters of Genre in Regency dress. I know Jim Hines could pull it off, but would love to see Myke Cole and Saladin Ahmed in a frock like this. The ladies can wear suits.
Another charity idea?
I think it’s lovely that you’re so capable of expressing your femininity! (But then, I *would* lol :) ) If this style appeals to you, you might consider something like the HolyClothing Haley, or perhaps the Timandra. I have three HolyClothing dresses myself and LOVE them!
I would have put you in periwinkle, or another deep blue, but this works. Lovely silhouette.
Oooh! Many bigups to Amygalert for the heads up on HolyClothing — the Haley is *very* tempting.
Okay, so you lived up to the Twitterbet by donning the dress after they raised $500, but it sounds like you added the choker and fascinator just because you wanted to.
Considering the heat in Ohio this time of year, shouldn’t you have worn something more Eyere-Y? (I told myself I shouldn’t do this, but I have no self-control)
All that grass! All that well-mown, richly green…. work.
Ok, I’m finally thankful for my 2nd floor apartment…
I want to be there on the day you casually mention (preferably to PNH) that you wish to use this photo for your next author pic.
Dang, you look classy. Thank you and MRK both!
You look great. I love to see a man who’s man enough to make that bet and see it through. Good for you! (And I came here from your “feminist” post – good to see a man who’s man enough to be a feminist, too.)
This is FABOOTY! Darling, as a dedicated Star Trek drag queen (Yes, I’m Moxie Magnus, the Chief Cosmetology Officer on the USS Enterprise under Captain James T Kirk–How do you do?) I cannot express how much delight this post has brought into my already overly fabulous day! Why I might need some smelling salts!
Anyhoo, thank you, thank you and thank you. Some people are the cat’s pajamas. You my dear are the negligee of the cheetah!
THIS is what a smackdown looks like.
Thank you for your understanding the fear and self-hate that keeps thousands like me in the closet for decades and lifetimes. Your image which requires “bravery” for a man is uncomfortable for those of us who will be seen the same way if we live our souls publicly at least early in our transitions. Several of your followers with their humorous comments reinforces our fear to try to live honorable lives as we must. Your statement on transgender sent is admirable as is your awareness of your lack of some understanding. I do believe there is a general social blindness to “man in a dress” as humor. To me it is as inappropriate as is rape humor or blackface and I win few or no friends when I try to make this point and I have lost several… in fact one very important today. If there where motivation to support a group I would suggest the Trans Youth Network. http://www.transyouthsupportnetwork.org
Thanks, Jeanne. I’ll definitely check out that link.