Today’s Song I Kinda Hate
It’s this one:
Why do I hate it? Basically because it sounds like someone listened to “Everything is Awesome” from The LEGO Movie, didn’t realize the song was being played for irony in that film (possibly because the film had, you know, LEGO), and strove to recreate the song’s valorization of a mediocre existence here in the real world without so much as a hint of self-awareness. I mean, for fuck’s sake, the lyrics in the chorus are:
Can’t complain about much these days, I believe we’ll be okay…
We’re screaming out, I believe we’ll be okay.
Really? That’s what we’re screaming out? Unless we’ve just fallen six stories out of an open window and are letting our terrified family members know we’re still alive, the hell we are. Having an okay existence, pretty much by definition, is not worth screaming about. Winning the lottery? Scream away. Been proposed to by the person that you want to spend the rest of your life with? Totally screamworthy. New puppy? Scream your heart out. Your life is okay? That’s an indifferent shrug. At best.
Which is why the song bugs the crap out of me: It’s like the national anthem of lowered expectations. Your uplifting chorus is “I can’t complain”? What the hell is wrong with you? Please show us on the doll where life kicked the shit out of you so damn hard that being okay is a cause for unreasonable celebration. This is the summer song for the emotionally dead inside.
Or worse than that —
(turns off the lights, turns on flashlight underneath chin for spooky, paranoid effect)
— it’s a song specifically designed to define down what you should be expecting out of life. Things being great? Yeah, that’s a little much for right now. Maybe you should scale it back, friend. Be okay with okay — no, scratch that: Be ecstatic about okay! Scream it out! Wheeee! Life is marginally better than entirely full of suck! Have a beer!
(turns off flashlight, turns lights back on)
Seriously. Fuck this song. Fuck being okay. I deserve better than okay. So do you.
(Shakes cane, shoos this band off his lawn)