This is How You Handle Arbitrary Milestones on Social Media
Posted on July 11, 2014 Posted by John Scalzi 32 Comments
And now you know. Go ye forth and do likewise.
Posted on July 11, 2014 Posted by John Scalzi 32 Comments
By the way, my 50,000th tweet is just a few tweets away now. I WILL FILL IT WITH WISDOM THAT WILL CHANGE THE WORLD. Or a picture of cat.
— John Scalzi (@scalzi) July 11, 2014
If you imagine that every cat picture on the Internet is a lost chance to express universal wisdom, it certainly changes what cat pics mean.
— John Scalzi (@scalzi) July 11, 2014
OH GOD HERE IT COMES EITHER WISDOM TO LIGHT THE WORLD FOR GENERATIONS TO COME OR JUST ANOTHER PICTURE OF MY STUPID CAT PREPARE YOURSELF
— John Scalzi (@scalzi) July 11, 2014
— John Scalzi (@scalzi) July 11, 2014
Thanks for your attention during this time of monumental transition. Please feel free now to go back to your quotidian lives.
— John Scalzi (@scalzi) July 11, 2014
"BUT I WANTED A CAT PICTURE" ::sigh:: Fine. Here. ENJOY THE EMPTY CHARADE THAT IS YOUR EXISTENCE. pic.twitter.com/FRJXr3DHVI
— John Scalzi (@scalzi) July 11, 2014
And now you know. Go ye forth and do likewise.
Category: Uncategorized
Taunting the tauntable since 1998
John Scalzi, proprietor – JS
Athena Scalzi, editor – AMS
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Your dog is oddly foreshortened.
I am certain there is significance in that if you look for it.
More wisdom: http://gilmoure.tumblr.com/post/91456521216/sasha-aka-big-dog
Isn’t Daisy saying “But! I’m so much better than a cat!”
I gained considerable wisdom from the cat photo.
Long haired cat=lots of time will be spent vacuuming. :)
They are wonderful animals and you have taken many nice pictures of them.
But these particular photos, I think, are not photos we would want to put in one of those souvenir capsules they send into deep space, as representative of life here on Earth….
I’m glad you treated that with the solemnity that all social media milestones deserve.
That’s 21.72 tweets per day, or roughly one per hour.
50,000 tweets at 70 letters per tweet is 3,500,000 letters.
Average of 7 letters per word is 500,000 words.
A median-length novel is 65,000.
That’s 7.7 novels you could have written !!111@%!!!!eleventy
HOW CAN YOU SHORTCHANGE YOUR FANS SO BADLY>????@!!@ AFTER ALL THE BACON WE’VE BOUGHT FOR YOU!!
What Not the Reddit Chris said. Seventy seven novels! (OK I see the decimal point there but I don’t care)
I, for one, welcome our new Cat Pix curious overlords.
Wait a minute. He could have written 777 more novels in the last six years if he hadn’t been twittering? What is up with that John?!!!!!!!!!!
Actually, the way I handle arbitrary milestones on social media is more along the lines of “Oh, hey, looks like I hit a thousand tweets a few tweets ago.”
To give historical context to What Not the Reddit Chris’s back of the envelope: my late friend and collaborator Isaac Asimov wrote 363 days per years (wife #2 forced him to take 2 days off, during which he had withdrawal symptoms), typing for 10 hours at 90 words per minute… AND SELLING EVERY WORD.
“Oddly Foreshortened.” That’s a strange name for a dog.
And the name of Scalzi’s next band will be:
Oddly Foreshortened Dogz
Damnit, I wanted wisdom. Or at least a Time Lord. Geez. Have some twerking stormtroopers:https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=751853328160332&set=vb.100000070158932&type=2&theater
Erm, Go ye forth, surely?
That’s a lovely picture of Ghlaghghgee. It’s times like this that I sorely miss chang who is not chang.
Oh, and congratulations on the monumental transitional moment :).
The old switcheroo.
Well, duh. See how far spelling cat backwards gets you.
you live in ohio and you did not tweet that Lebron is coming home? I need to shove a little dudebro down your throat. Dude… wtf?
Guess:
You don’t actually pay attention to my Twitter feed, do you?
look at the tweets listed on your blog. never used twitter.
ok i feel stupid and old.
I came to see if you’d heard the Selective Service is implementing the “Old Man’s War” gambit… http://m.washingtonpost.com/national/men-get-draft-notices-100-years-after-the-fact/2014/07/10/dffac3c2-083d-11e4-8615-4eddc1f1cffa_story.html only to find you frittering away you’re time on twitter milestones. Sad.
Schnauzer:
Yet again, it pays to pay attention to my Twitter feed.
We don’t need no stinkin’ twitter feed!!
For my own part, I live in Cincinnati, *not* Cleveland, so I really don’t care what LeBron does.
Well, I think Daisy is saying, “OMG, and I have to live with this maniac!” And Ghlaghghgee is saying, “Yeah, he does get into these moods, doesn’t he?”
Something in this thread triggered this: I’m now imagining a Scalzi-written Doctor Who episode called “The Doctor and the Dudebros,” where the Doctor realizes the menace he’s up against isn’t actually alien at all, but just a bunch of MRAs. He gives them a peek at the Untempered Schism, and they see what losers they are and implode.
Have to wait for the post-Moffat era, of course.
Shortest Dr. Who episode ever!
But posting cat pictures is universal wisdom!
Okay, and posting dog pictures is, too.
This was epic. I actually rolled on the floor with laughter for several minutes when i saw this.
Well done, sir!
Wait a minute. He could have written 777 more novels in the last six years if he hadn’t been twittering?
Obviously he’s only half the writer Isaac Asimov was…
Yes, John really could have written 7777 more novels if he hadn’t been Twittering, but the reason he moved to Ohio is writing is considered an agricultural activity there. John actually receives federal crop subsidies not to write. This helps keep the price of fiction high enough to support writers in reasonable comfort. (Theoretically. In practice, it’s the John Scalzis and the Stephen Kings of this world who reap the benefits, and the struggling family word farm continues to suffer.)
[Deleted for being nowhere on topic – JS]