In Which Mary Robinette Kowal Reads My Sexy, Sexy Tweets

So yesterday evening I was feeling saucy and decided to invite all of Twitter in my Lair of Sexiness. It went a little something like this:

Then, in conversation, I noted that Mary Robinette Kowal should read them in her Phone Sex Voice, because that would be awesome. Well, guess what?

Truly, this is the best of all possible worlds.

26 Comments on “In Which Mary Robinette Kowal Reads My Sexy, Sexy Tweets”

  1. Well, no one wanted to say anything, so I was standing here at the gate and they kicked me in. So, um, hi. I was told to say, ‘What are you doing exactly?’ Okay, now I’ll ask my question. Wouldn’t sriracha sting like the dickens? What? I mean, in your eyes. Geez.

  2. OK, this has convinced me that it’s really time for me to go to sleep. I’m sure this won’t be as weird in the morning.

    Or maybe it will.

    Oh hugh57. Now someone has to write that! I’m tempted myself. “Once she was quite thoroughly bound in silken scarves, he employed the tiniest of cold glamours…her nipples stood up rather nicely, he thought.” And so on.

  3. @hugh57: No, I believe you’re thinking of The Dimly Lit War of the High Thread Counts, Book One: The Late Night City: Prologue, which was still way batter than Fifty Shades of Cliché.

    @Xopher: Yup, off to the relative normalcy of Dreamtime…

  4. I’m just glad it is unguents in the lair, and not an assortment of ungulates. People need room to MOOO-ve around after all.

  5. Also…

    Really John, Sriracha is not a hot-tub type of condiment. Wasabi on the other hand… yeah baby! ~cannonball!!!!!!~

  6. The only way in which this could possibly be better is if Mary had read the sexy sexy Tweets in Puppet Voice, b/c that shit? Is hilarious.

    We lost it at her rendition of (porn music).

    hugh57: That is a book I would buy.

  7. The perfect accompaniment to First Coffee on a saturday morning. Sadly, the rest of the day will be a disappointment by comparison. :)

  8. This was aces! It also reminds me I need a go-to sexy voice person in case the need ever arises. *gets Yellow Pages*

  9. Yep, I might as well go back to bed, because the rest of Saturday, as Kaal said, will really just be pitiful after this. (Are you people supposed to be having that much fun? ‘Cause I’m a grownup too, and *I’m* sure not. I am questioning all my life choices.)

  10. lkeke35 – I am a Librarian Clerk in the Midwestern US. Its my job to know stuff (or at the very least, admit I know nothing, and go find out!) I love SciFi and Horror, Books, Movies, and television shows. I celebrate Blackness all year round. I am intolerant of intolerance.
    lkeke35

    Okay! I couldn’t even finish watching that because I’m at work and my sight is all blurry now.

    Wow!

  11. Mary Robinette Kowal – Mary Robinette Kowal is the author of SHADES OF MILK AND HONEY (Tor 2010) & won the 2008 Campbell Award for Best New Writer. She is also a professional puppeteer.
    Mary Robinette Kowal

    @hugh57 Fifty Shades of Milk and Honey? You mean this?

  12. Richard Gadsden – Manchester, England, UK – British Lib Dem, sf nerd, amateur historian, election-systems geek, professionally a developer, can be found as po8crg on most platforms.
    po8crg

    I always suspected that Mary Robinette Kowal was evil, but now it’s confirmed; there’s no link there.

  13. DangerKitty – I like my family, running, triathlon, F/SF and my job. I use my job to pay for the others. I believe in doing the right thing even when no one is watching.
    Randall

    Well, my life is now complete.

  14. Mayonnaise hot tub for the win! Illegal*, immoral, AND fattening! It’s a trifecta!

    *several food safety laws, at the very least

    And congrats to MRK for keeping a straight, if pouty-lipped, face throughout the reading.

  15. Was that Wren imitating Celeste, or, more likely, Celeste imitating Wren imitating Celeste? (Either way, my morning was “incrementally” better for it! :-D) [Go listen to Kowal and Ray Porter reading ‘The Incrementalists’, at Audible.com…]

  16. I had to rest my head on the desk after the porn music. This was made to share with everyone I know. Thank you so very much for this.

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