This Year’s Selection of Christmas Stories

I have a few! Here are some, for you to pass the time with this Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.

The Ten Least Successful Christmas Specials of All Time

Interview with the Nativity Innkeeper

8 Things You Didn’t Know About Your Favorite Holiday Music

Script Notes on the Birth of Jesus

Interview with Santa’s Reindeer Wrangler

Merry Christmas!

7 Comments on “This Year’s Selection of Christmas Stories”

  1. What a delightful giggle-break in the middle of the holiday prep chaos – thank you! I particularly like the interview with the innkeeper; you caught his voice perfectly.

    If you ever consider doing a fundraiser chapbook of your holiday stories, I would buy the heck out of it. Just sayin’.

  2. Hell is not hot enough nor eternity long enough! Clearly, you are the chief architect of the downfall of Western Civilization. Apart from that, you’re okay.

  3. As someone named Barbara who also loves Christmas (although my house isn’t decorated to QUITE that extent), I love the caption of that photo.

    As an aside, my brother is named John (although we never called him Johnnie), and he would TOTALLY have tried to creep me out like Johnnie does with Barbara at the beginning of NotLD if we were in that situation. Siblings; you’ve gotta love ’em.

    Merry Christmas, John!

  4. I think anyone who has worked retail can tell you that the real zombies are inside the shopping malls.

    They’re coming to get you Barbara.
    They’re coming to take your life away.
    They’re coming to suck your mind, and steal your time
    And wreck your shelf display.

    I was going to link to a video of Dr. Dour and Peach singing that, but the video isn’t finished yet and the album is still at the Kickstarter stage. Too soon!

  5. Re the Interview with the Nativity Innkeeper, all I could think of was a surprisingly well-written (i.e. not leadenly reverent) Nativity radio play I heard decades ago:

    (Joseph knocks)

    Innkeeper: I’m sorry, I have no rooms.

    Joseph: But…my wife…she’s going to have a baby!

    Innkeeper: Mazel Tov! I still have no rooms!

    (I don’t remember the exchange over the barn verbatim, but it wasn’t too far off yours if I recall correctly.)

    The British comic Jasper Carrott also pointed out that the Wise Men’s gifts included gold – and with that, if he’d been Joseph, he’d have checked the whole family into the Bethlehem Hilton.

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