Last week was EMPIRE'S END. This week is THUNDERBIRD. Two new books out — which means, in five years, I've published 20 novels. Um. Huh.

— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) February 28, 2017

SETTLE DOWN CHUCK

— John Scalzi (@scalzi) February 28, 2017

MAKE ME, DAD

— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) February 28, 2017

GO TO YOUR ROOM. AND DON'T WRITE ANY BOOKS WHILE YOU ARE THERE.

— John Scalzi (@scalzi) February 28, 2017

I AM IN MY ROOM NOW AND I AM WRITING A BOOK ON THE WALLS

HA HA HA YOU CAN'T STOP ME DAD

— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) February 28, 2017

(comes up the stairs with a bucket of flat white paint and a roller)

— John Scalzi (@scalzi) February 28, 2017

THAT'S MY MASTERPIECE YOU MONSTER PUT THAT PAINT DOWN

— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) February 28, 2017

IT'S JUST THE WORD "JELLYBEAN" OVER AND OVER

— John Scalzi (@scalzi) February 28, 2017

THAT'S CALLED "ART," DAD.

ASK AROUND, YOU PLEBE

— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) February 28, 2017

(spreads the paint on the wall)

LOOK NOW WE'RE COLLABORATING

— John Scalzi (@scalzi) February 28, 2017

OH MY GOD YOU CAN'T JUST TAKE A POOP ON A PLATE OF FOOD AND SAY YOU'RE THE SOUS CHEF

— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) February 28, 2017

(Splashes paint on the poop plate)

THERE NOW IT'S ART

— John Scalzi (@scalzi) February 28, 2017

OH GOD THE POOP PLATE WAS METAPHORICAL JEEZ YOU REALLY DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING

— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) February 28, 2017

THEN WHY DID YOU HAVE A PLATE OF POOP IN YOUR ROOM CHUCK YOU KNOW WHAT I'M DONE WAIT UNTIL YOUR MOTHER GETS HOME

— John Scalzi (@scalzi) February 28, 2017

MOM LEFT YOU SIX YEARS AGO, DAD

THAT PLATE OF POOP WAS HERS BUT IT'S LIKE YOU DON'T WANT TO ADMIT IT

— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) February 28, 2017

(opens closet)

(sees poop collection)

THIS EXPLAINS ALL THE FEBREEZE YOU BUY, SON

— John Scalzi (@scalzi) February 28, 2017

ALSO I DRINK IT

THE FEBREZE NOT THE POOP

I FEEL THAT CLARIFICATION IS IMPORTANT

— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) February 28, 2017

OH MAN FEBREEZE SMOOTHIES AMIRITE

I DID NOT KNOW YOU LOVED THEM TOO

COME HERE SON LET US HUG OUR LONG ESTRANGEMENT HAS ENDED

— John Scalzi (@scalzi) February 28, 2017

FEBREZE SMOOTHIES AND BABY SEAL BURRITOS FOR ALL

*pulls lever*

*baby seals rain from ceiling as we embrace and weep*

— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) February 28, 2017