Me (to Krissy): Hey, you know how I have a photo program to even out skin tones and otherwise do some tweaking?
Me: So, I took one of your pictures and ran it through the default setting four or five times and came out with… something terrifying.
Krissy: What does that mean?
Me: Well, here, look:
Krissy: What the fuck.
Me: Right? Like, this is a picture where if you saw it on Tinder, you’d be all “My libido says to swipe right, but my brain says to swipe left and then chuck the phone as far away as I can.”
Krissy: I’m creeped out, and that’s me.
Me: So can I put it up online?
Krissy: Hell, yeah. And send it to me. I’m going to make it my Facebook photo.