Posted on January 28, 2018 Posted by John Scalzi 26 Comments
It’s not quite the Super Blue Blood Moon, or whatever they’ll be calling it when it gets full in a few days. But it’s still pretty cool. And a nice capper on a good weekend.
Taunting the tauntable since 1998
John Scalzi, proprietor – JS
Athena Scalzi, contributor – AMS
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Dear John,
Very cool, and a particularly clean rendition of the “Woman in the Moon.” She is slightly tilted forward here.
For those who don’t know what I’m talking about:
https://ourstorybeginsdotcom.files.wordpress.com/2011/10/lady_in_moon.jpg
One of my very favorite astronomical illusions.
I think I first learned of it as a child 50-odd years ago in my Edmund Scientific telescope manual. I am surprised at how many amateur astronomers today have never heard of it. Appears to have gone out of fashion.
pax / Ctein
Hey, I saw that same moon through the trees in back of MY house! What were the odds?
Ah, now then. (1st attempt got nuked by الجن. They’re very sneaky at deleting full comments by jumping on buttons and hitting X marks the spot). This will lack the poetic flow of the first incarnation since (y’all spot the movie reference if you’ve seen it later on) I’ve now been swiped. Getting back into Greek meta and Norse Rhyme is really difficult. [This actually happened: the first post was in meter and based on a Song to the Goddess Athena in respect for U.L. Guin].
In fact, I had to reformat the entire comment in the style of your Hacker Communities as a joke[0].
Host – Since Ursula left us, and this not a Male Moon[1], and she deserves a shout to the void for The Dispossessed[2], expect… general weirdness. A lot of it.
Oh, and Hel(a)[3] has some words of Wisdom for you:
Now my course is tough:
Death, close sister
of Odin’s enemy
stands on the ness:
with resolution
and without remorse
I will gladly
await my own
Moon & Water: The Shape of Water: Good but the ending (no spoilers) was so deliberately anti-Hollywood it felt flat. Then again, the typical American Audience won’t understand the rotten-finger references [4]. There’s a link here. Female Masturbation in movies winning (potential) Oscars? Come a long way since forced butter insertions[5] #Metoo?
Wait, sorry. Without the poetry, it becomes stale and boring.
Δέδυκε μεν ἀ σελάννα
καὶ Πληΐαδεσ, μέσαι δὲ
νύκτεσ πάρα δ᾽ ἔρχετ᾽ ὤρα,
ἔγω δὲ μόνα κατεύδω.
That’s how it feels for this moment.
@Host – love. Don’t worry, we still have some teeth left.
[0] Meta. So so meta. My new ICO, called “CTHUL-COIN” has now reached a $103 billion market cap. It’s tied to your soul as a market weighting. Apparently old Narly is running the exchanges. And no, Heat-Maps of public running devices are not a security threat. Although you should probably check out -83, 80 and wonder what Scientists are doing running up to that [REDACTED]. Actually more interesting: you can basically track Scientists on research stations via it. They’re very Geeky.
[1]https://www.nasa.gov/feature/super-blue-blood-moon-coming-jan-31/ — such things that make Royalty (even the fake kind) nervous. HELLO DC…..!
[2] The irony that most singing praises to her memory are not ones who ever lived on the Moon (metaphorically) is not lost on many of us. Aka, please stop pretending you’re Anarchists, it’s really insulting. For the Anarchists, well: ****HUGS****
[3] Now that’s a Roman / Greek misappropriation of a Nordic Goddess. And no, she wasn’t all bad. Don’t add random “A”s to non-latinate languages Hollywood. There was an entire segment on this, but apparently we’re really not allowed to post texts that aren’t in the wild. Especially if in Icelandic. [Meta-Joke: There’s a mural with a Vampire White Boy and lost and predated brown folk in Iceland. If you know where it is, you know more about Iceland than 99% of the Visitors]
[4] Trigger Warning: looking this up on Reddit and other places will lead you to posts where people remove their own pinky fingers with sharp (and in some cases, not so sharp) objects. If you want to understand this, well…
[5] If you’re shocked by this: you made it, you eat the sin. Your MPAA also managed to police such blatant nonsense as R for many years. Literally, female orgasm = R rated. Purge your own ideological cul-de-sacs.
Ah, sorry: @Host and readers. Forgot you need warnings: that finger thing. It’s a real thing (just like the Yakuza) but with a lot more Wyrd attached to it (pun… not really intended).
Basically: if you want to keep your Mind imagining that America and Freedom and the entire myth is a real thing.
Don’t ask about the Fingers.
No, really.
You’re going to see them chopped off. For Real.
@Host sorry for Spam.
Left Hand of Darkness and “Lion, Tigers and Bears” here.
But really: you’ve no idea (we hope) about what the symbolism and general wyrd about decaying left pinkies mean. And the reality of people chopping them off.
It’s… well. Mr. Guillermo del Toro doesn’t choose his symbolism lightly (personally: Pan’s Labyrinth was the better film, The Shape of Water was all kinds of watered down to not threaten American sensibilties.
It’s actually the Male Antithesis of what Ursula was doing, but…
If you don’t know about it: know this. His decaying fingers trope? Not actually about fingers.
And now, here’s FoxNews to explain why The Left Hand of Darkness was all about how trans* kids end up in Russian-style Winter Hellscapes…
And no: it’s not about his penis either – that’s too trite, too obvious and too.. well.
Stop asking about the fingers already.
Dude.
Dudette, technically. I mean, kinda. Current Host and High Priestess and stuff. Like the film, it’s kinda a thing that folds out from rather biologically complex folds rather than presents to the world constantly, y’know. We’re cool about you being curious though.
>Look, they’re better @ running stuff than me, ok. Wetware and networks – not about silicon.
You can have it two ways:
1) Serious discussion about reshaping the World into a more feminine zone. [Serious Note: Your readers didn’t like the allusions last time, and heck “no’d” out of what it would entail. Now we’re hunting Hollywood figures and politicians, weeeee! >>Gotta love Mermaids. Not the Disney Kinds. I mean, that’s not what you wanted? Seemed like you did.]
or
2) Why chopping off fingers is symbolism for [REDACTED]. No, really. It’s a HUGE thing (unlike penises). I mean, Left Hand of Darkness we can discuss, but not what Left Hand Pinky means to the Ultra-Right / Connected in America (without Yakuza references?!)
I mean, it’s literally such a big deal I can link you to people chopping them off. Like lots.
~
Ur-Translated: It’s a female Moon. Lose the pinkey or lose the penis. Bast [[etc]] really doesn’t care.
~
Non-bullshit zone? Tick-Tock, Time’s Up.
Oh, and…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKCIRUn4TeE
We LOVED Her. Le Guin, and WE HATE YOUR WORLD FOR NOT MAKING MORE OF HER. HER TEMPLATE SHOULD BE SO COMMON IT SPREADS LIKE A VIRUS.
Instead: you’re fucking the world with Penis Power, Coal and Lies.
<This, delete. You've no idea how angry we are.
Oh, and @Host.
If you thought you Twitter Drama was fleek before this, Hell No: you want to unlock the Hard-Core Mode, then sure. You’re a sweet man, but you seem to need a bit more danger in your life:
Ok, fine:
Left Pinky:
Right Pinky:
Note: there’s two Sumerian Phrases we won’t post here to spare Host. One essentially binds the living and one binds the dead but that’s not how their religion works.
But, Trust Us: We Know what they do.
@Host – Your (not really Native) Christian Eschatology is boring as fuck compared to what we are.
>>And you still have people cutting off fingers in your culture.
The trees remind me of a microscope slide.
The picture is gorgeous.
The commentary? I’m not sure if I took too much acid or if I need to do a lot more.
Info about the lunar eclipse on January 31.
https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2018/1/23/16911140/total-lunar-eclipse-2018-blue-moon-supermoon-blood-explained
Commentary reminds me of Usenet celebs of ages past. Specifically the Doctress Neutopia, who apparently still exists decades after confusing and delighting trolls on Usenet.
I’m sure the picture will be delightful when I’m on an Internet connection that doesn’t block its hosting site.
Dear indigo,
What we need is an individual comment blocker, sigh.
Talk about spamming…
pax / Ctein
Talk about spamming…
You’ll want: A History of Limb Amputations John Kirkup. Specific chapter: Ritual, Punitive, Legal and Iatrogenic Causes, c.f. Hottentot or more accurately, Khoikhoi[1]. Or you could find the US version, which is commonly found under “Criminology” where it’s most frequently seen.
Or Other places. Give Mr Del Toro credit, he knows his historical references.
We’ll run with the obvious ones that won’t get censored: it’s a really clever reference to marriage and bonding, something The Shape of Water specifically focuses on. Basic symbolic dualism, but well done. (1950’s Nuclear Family vrs older ‘tribal’ bonding etc etc. The specific line in the film revolves around sexual congress in and silence).
Hmm. Since last spam flood, you appear to have lost another high ranking FBI person. Not sure they’re related[2].
Narrator: But they were.
https://youtu.be/bV8YbLvGrb0?t=9
[1] Depending on your cynicism levels, you’ll find it unsurprising to note that the Dutch / European name for their culture is actively pejorative and equates stuttering (with all those social connotations) with their dialect. Weird eh, almost baked in.
[2] Nuclear Weapon symbolism is not subtle but hey. It’s on. .@RepAdamSchiff says GOP Majority Chairman Nunes also told Committee it is launching investigation into FBI and DOJ A. Mitchell, NBC News, 29th Jan 2018.
Specifically the Doctress Neutopia, who apparently still exists decades after confusing and delighting trolls on Usenet.
If you read the links, you’ll spot something that should raise an eyebrow.
Spoilers for Mr Ctein:
The religious mythology of the Khoikhoi gives special significance to the Moon, which may have been viewed as the physical manifestation of a supreme being associated with heaven
*Innocent Look*
@Host, sorry, it’s protocol. Have to do the triptych.
Hottentot finger amputations signified marriage and betrothal. A second finger was sacrificed if one wished to remarry
The Munchausen Complex: Socialization of Violence and Abuse Richard L. Matteoli, Google Books source.
Note: that doesn’t really cover the entire story, but there we go. History is written by the people who forcefully converted them to Christianity and massacred ~10,000 or so of them in the process.
p.s.
@Host: your readers are mostly very pleasant and nice people (myself not included) but The Wild Ride is about to really kick in.
I think the American phrase, 20-21st Century is “And make God have mercy upon your souls.
~
More importantly: 2nd parts of movie trilogies are always the darkest.
And, last one (promise!). You’ll want to reference “The Hottentot Venus”.
Note: any and all links are going to be NSFW since, you know, it involves women’s anatomy.
The ‘Hottentot Venus’ John R. Baker: Race, Oxford University Press, 1974 (And yes, it’s from 1974: expect it to be problematic). And yes, it has anatomical drawings and photographs.
But, and here’s the bit that should twist your noodle:
Introducing Our Winter Cover Star: Kim Kardashian Paper Magazine, 2014. Know as “the pictures that will break the internet”.
MY SUMMONERS TELL ME THIS IS CULTURAL APPROPRIATION OF THE HIGHEST ORDER.
There you go, Mr Ctein and others. Not sure you realize your culture is basically running appropriated White Nationalist memes as Fashion, but…
It is.
Out of Character meta-commentary: the worst part of this all is that the people doing it think they’re awfully clever and sophisticated and no-one can see it but them. Spoilers: less than 10mins to break this particular American Code. Mr Del Toro obviously has to be a little more circumspect in his allusions.
“Fools,
what good is the moon to a heartless man?
Put back your hearts and get on your knees
and drink as you never have,
until your throats are coated with silver
and your voices ring like bells.”
And they fished with their lips and tongues
until the water was gone
and the moon had slipped away
in the soft, bottomless mud.
Oh, and @Host. The entire double entendre here[1]?
NOT. AN. ACCIDENT. WE CAN SUBVERT THESE THINGS AND TURN THEM INTO SILVERY LIGHT INSTANTLY.
Want to churn that noodle a bit more? Mercury is the pinky finger metal in astrology and so forth.
बुध / सौम्य
He happens to have a prior claim on it.
That’s for any male Homo Sapiens Sapiens who were feeling excluded.
[1]https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=moon
Sorry Host, one last joke.
If you’re wondering if Budha graha[1] looks like “KeK” the frog meme.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Budha_graha.JPG
Why, yes.. yes he does. thatsthejokje.jpg
Budha is the root of the word ‘Budhavara’ or Wednesday in the Hindu calendar.[1] The word “Wednesday” in the Greco-Roman and other Indo-European calendars is also dedicated to planet Mercury (“day of Woden or Oden”)
Sorry: I forget humans aren’t supposed to be able to do this. But Wednesday is the 31st.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QkWS9PiXekE
Filters? That’s a bit of a problem given your entire species is at stake.
[1] Not actually Buddha.
All tied into a bow, all referenced and all culturally sensitive and respectful. It even makes sense read Downwards or Upwards.
*nose wiggle*
There’s always Light.
(And yes, promise not to spam you until the next “Shock & Awe” technique is unveiled.
Oh, boy. Forgot the last joke (which was implicit from the start) [Note: spoilers for The Shape of Water)
The last line said by the evil white dude?
“You.. are a God”
Mr Ctein: you have your answer.
“The moon is always female.” — Marge Piercy
Dear John,
It’s your house, it’s your site, but please– just block this frikkin’ troll.
It’s annoying having to scroll past umpteen messages to look for the few left by worthwhile commenters. Makes me inclined to not even look.
pax / Ctein