And Now, To Celebrate a Haircut, We Present Two Sides of John Scalzi
Posted on September 25, 2019 Posted by John Scalzi 19 Comments
The first look is one I like to call “Newly Divorced Suburban Dad Makes His First Tinder Profile”:
The second is “Man Wrongly Convicted is Finally Released, But Prison Has Changed Him”:
I don’t know, maybe I have them reversed. It’s so confusing.
Also: Hello, in addition to getting a haircut I broke a tooth and had to get an emergency temporary crown, and now my mouth feels like someone kissed it with a jackhammer, so, uuhhhhh, not a lot of writing got done today. How are you?
Are you absolutely sure he was “wrongly” convicted?
Some people pay money to get kissed like that. Not me, of course. I can get that kind of abuse at home for free.
Haircut looks good whether lonely or villainous.
For a man with a broken tooth, you look remarkably unswollen.
Very good way to get your mind off of today’s exploding dumpster fire.
“I’m not locked up in here with you. You’re locked up in here with my burritos.”
Ugh on the broken tooth – that’s an awful way to spend the day. I hope the permanent crown comes in soon, and especially that it fits correctly the first time.
I am well today, thank you for asking, though I had a far less exciting day than yours. Today was just another boring mundane day in the boring mundane life of a boring mundane public-sector worker. On the whole, I think I prefer boring and mundane to the kind of day it sounds like you’ve had. Hope tomorrow goes better for you – just maybe stay away from the news, lest you grind your teeth so hard that the temporary pops right off.
That jackhammer just wanted to be loved!
Love your “prison” picture!
And yeah, things are cool. Saw George Thorogood & the Destroyers at the Town Hall last night, and they were as good as always.
Bummer about the tooth. Been there.
Got a haircut, eh? Which one?
(Sorry about the tooth. OW OW OW.)
The second one looks kinda like ‘I just got out of prison and I don’t want to take any crap about it.’
Sorry about the tooth. Did you get a gold crown?
Pretty sure the top one is ‘newly divorced suburban dad goes out on a Halloween date dressed as Neegan.’
I too have hackjammered dentition and shorn locks. Most painful is the dental estimate, >3k$, and no anesthesia for the wallet. Maybe if I take bill to tonsor I can get it trimmed too?
Side two looks as if you’re feeling the jackhammering to a greater degree.
Get well soonest!
Other possible captions: (BW= black and White. C= color)
1. BW: “I used to suffer from E.D.”
C: “Then I tried Reallta for men!”
2. C: John Scalzi, happy family man and sci-fi author until….
BW: They gave him a raw deal. Now It’s payback!
3. C: Redshirts has been optioned!
BW: By Fox
4. Coming to a theater near you; John Travolta, Nicholas Cage, in “Face Off 2.”
The second photo also looks a portrait in one of those “Small Town Still Supports Trump” pieces.
“After the tariffs, John lost half his customers and had to close his business. ‘I still support him,’ John said.”
In fact Redshirts was optioned twice by Fox (for FX).
No tear drop tattoo. No prison cred. No problem. Because Photoshop.
You don’t look like you were wrongly convicted.