Not a Single One of You Correctly Guessed the Holiday Song I Was Thinking of for the “Murder By Other Means” ARC Contest
Posted on December 19, 2020 Posted by John Scalzi 28 Comments
None of you! 577 comments, not a single one correctly guessed the song I was thinking about.
Which, incidentally, was this one:

Now, “Santa Claus’ Party” is not a “top tier” holiday song in terms of popularity, but I didn’t think it was so hopelessly obscure that out of a few hundred people not a single one of you would think of it. But, I guess, I have learned something new today. And so have all y’all, namely, this song. I hope you enjoy it!
Since no one correctly guessed the song, I asked Alexa to randomly pick a number between one and 577, that being the total number of comments in the thread. Alexa picked 493, and I counted backward to find “orkydd” in that comment space. So congratulations, Orkydd! I have already sent you a confirmation email.
Everyone else: Thank you so much for playing, and thank you also for a very interesting collection of holiday songs in the comment thread. Some, I dare say, are far more obscure than “Santa Claus’ Party.” I’m going to enjoy seeking them out.
— JS
New to me! Never heard it before.
I think if the contest was the most annoying song (the one that won’t go away ever in one’s brain), I would have won with my guess (Wonderful Christmastime). Oh, well. At least 2020 is almost done with. :)
Never heard of it! But now I have. Thanks for a new tune in my Xmas repertoire.
Cool! I love it!
Thanks!
Never heard of it.
Nice one! Thanks to you, John, I now know a new song!! And you know what I am going to put it out there in my LinkedIn group for Wishing my friends and colleagues as my Christmas song! Thanks again for the fun of the contest! Wishing you and your loved a lovely holiday season, awesome Christmas and New Year! Vaccine time hopefully. This is Karthik Menon from Singapore. A new fan of your writing from Singapore. Read and loved The Dispatcher :-) now looking forward to your other works. God Bless
And here I was going to go with The Ramones “Merry Christmas (I don’t want to fight)”
Huh. Still think “Christmas in Prison” offered the best mix of relative obscurity and metaphor for Holiday Season 2020, especially since John Prine succumbed to Covid.
I don’t know many obscure Christmas songs. And playing Wonderful Christmastime should be considered a violation of the Geneva Convention.
I’m guessing it is hopelessly obscure. I’ve never heard that song, and I’ve heard a lot of Christmas music. I’m not old enough to remember it from when it was new (1952), but neither are you.
Be aware. I have contacted many important people who are willing to sign an after david that I won the contest. So please cease and resist this attempt to deny the will of me or I will be forced to release the Krakauer. This I swear under plenty of perjury.
I guess none of us are mind readers. Who knew?
Thanking you John (and Athena) for a most excellently designed contest (and masterful application of randomness). Postal service ‘enhancements’ notwithstanding I eagerly await the prize in 2021. In the meantime I have a wicked selection of holiday songs to assemble into a playlist.
release the Krakauer
Go tell it on the mountain.
Johnny wants a pair of skates
Susie wants a dolly
Violet wants a story book
She thinks dolls are folly!
When I went to make my guess, I had three songs in mind. But I stuck to the rules and guessed only one. I had one in mind above the other two and nobody had guessed it (yet) so I went with the Spinal Tap Christmas song. My second choice was Father Christmas by The Kinks and many others had already put that one in.
I was surprised that no one guessed my third song (last I checked) which was The Season’s Upon Us by The Dropkick Murphys. That one is MUCH more recent than the other two. I would have found it funny if that had ended up being the song.
@Shrinking Violet Originally Nellie in the song. I’m assuming you are personalizing it. Hope you enjoyed your story book!
It’s Theodore in the Chipmunks version. The other two children are also renamed for the Chipmunks, and other words are changed so the song still rhymes.
Hm, I guess my avoidance of holiday music must have been more effective than I imagined, as I can swear I never, ever heard “Santa Claus’s Party” not even once in my life. And I’m horribly susceptiboe to earworms around this time of year.
Rump a pum pum …
Never heard it before. You sure picked a non-standard.
@Shirley Marquez Yes, I identified strongly with Nellie! It was devastating one year to receive a Midge doll when every other girl got a Barbie. A book, any book, on the other hand… ^_^
I’m old, and yet in 70+ years I never heard of it either. Yes, it’s obscure.
I’d have gone with “Blue Christmas” by Porky Pig.
FYI: Julia Mattison and Joel Waggoner does songs… hilarious… pandemic twist on traditional Christmas carols: “Vaccine For Christmas”
https://broadwaypodcastnetwork.com/in-the-room/gettin-cozy-with-castmates-adventcarolndar-feat-joel-waggoner-julia-mattison/
What’s next Mr. Hargrove? Marital law?
Never heard Santa’s Christmas Party before. Thanks for the jolly addition to our Christmas play list.
Here is a great Aussie Christmas song by Paul Kelly.
https://youtu.be/iYqIF2XkqKU
Dear Phil,
I shall resist, with vigor, any law requiring me to get married!
pax / Emily Litella
Dear Folks,
My favorite holiday album, by far, is “Watching the Snow by Michael Franks.
jest sayin’…
pax / celebratory Ctein
I’m a little sad that no one suggested “Christmas Card From A Hooker In Minneapolis.” especially the live version from Austin City Limits that starts out with “Silent Night.” 2020 sure feels like a Tom Waits Christmas.